Ricardo Lopes is an award-winning author, speaker, trainer, and coach at Advanced Leadership. Advanced Leadership is a creative and enthusiastic group that’s passionate about empowering businesses, and the people in them, to meet with greater success. It lends expertise and support in communications, training, employee engagement, and performance. In essence, it helps organizations, and the people in them, better communicate, collaborate, and generate extraordinary results, both within the organization and with their customers.  Ricardo has held several communications, training and development, and national sales development roles generating perennial record sales performances over multiple decades. Ricardo has coaching, speaking, and training accreditation from The John C. Maxwell Team and licensed access to its training materials. John C. Maxwell is a many time over best-selling author and is recognized internationally as one of the world’s top leadership and management development experts. Ricardo talks about coaching and how it helps improve performance.

Ricardo please tell me a little about you?

I’m a coach, speaker, and trainer at Advanced Leadership. We’re a learning and performance company that empowers organizations and the people in them, to better communicate, collaborate, and generate extraordinary results – with their peers, customers, and the teams they’re privileged to lead.  I’ve worked for almost 30 years in the business and corporate worlds, contributing in several roles such as a national business development coach and communications specialist more recently, and as a sales manager, sales officer trainer, and communication consultant, etc. prior to that.

How do you help executives increase their unique value proposition?

I work with individuals to identify the strengths that make them unique and help them play to them.  No one does you as well as you do you.  When you contribute to areas of strength, results come more naturally to you and you can accomplish far more in that area than someone who’s struggling or not engaged in the task at hand. The trick is to challenge yourself continually, by applying those strengths to new challenges, to ensure you keep growing.  

How important is it for an executive to communicate effectively?

I can’t think of anything MORE important.  But let’s be clear about something, according to the Mehrabian’s 7-38-55 Rule of Personal Communication, words only make up 7% of any message. Voice tonality and body language contribute 38% and 55%, respectively, to the intended meaning of a message.  This is why you can watch two people relay the same request with great variation in how people respond.  There are a number of leadership skills that executives need to develop to better influence, inspire, and generate results.  These are the soft skills that are mandatory and are very accurate predictors of how far any leader will go. No one cares how smart you are, the question is, do you have the leadership skills to influence, inspire, and generate results with a group of uniquely skilled individuals around you?

Is it important to get a little deeper when networking or should we just get the business card?

Less is more.  Meet with fewer people, get to know them, and build trust.  We do business with and create business opportunities for, people we know, like, and trust.  You can have the greatest skills or widget to sell, but if you fail to develop that connection, your business card will meet with someone’s wastepaper basket.  I might be showing my age but I love business cards.  I think they say something about a person.  I like to write two or three things that make that person unique right on the card when I get home and save them. You can only discover that information after investing some time with them. I organize them by groups of people I affiliate with and like to flip through them before I attend an event.  Even with the best of intentions, it’s hard to remember every detail when you meet so many people.  It takes a little bit of effort to flip through these mini cue cards, but the reward is seeing the smile of appreciation on that person’s face when you’ve remembered them and made them feel special.

How important is it for an executive to have balance in their lives?

Very Important. Balance brings a diversity of experience and thought that makes you more valuable to the organization. Balance makes sure you have the energy to endure the crunch. Balance ensures you are clear about your ‘why’.  When you clearly identify what you value outside of work, and allow yourself to participate in those activities or the lives of others, they become inspirations.  They help you find the last bit of gas in the tank that you need, to do what you must, in order to provide the means to continue to enjoy those moments outside of work.

You were in financial services for more than two decades give me some personal advice on finance?

First save, save, save.  Deduct right off your paycheck and learn to live within what’s left.

Second, there’s a great little button on most income tax software, “How much can I borrow such that my tax refund will pay off the loan”.  Now take your refund and pay off the loan you just took to grow your savings.  Let’s say you borrowed five grand and deposited it to your RRSP savings, now you have five grand plus all the growth it’s going to generate between now and the day in retirement when you take it out. All this, for what it cost you in nominal interest charges incurred from the day you borrowed and the day your tax refund was applied against the loan.

How is your coaching unique and helps executives feeling more empowered?

I love that word! If I could describe what we do in three words, it would be “Authentically you, empowered”. I would say my approach to coaching draws a clear line between coaching and mentoring.  They are not one and the same.  It’s troubling to watch pairings of individuals where the expectation is that a poor millennial is supposed to somehow follow, and start emulating, a decorated baby boomer or GenX for example.  I’ve met with success in leadership positions driving sales etc., but it would be a less productive coaching session if I tried to grow a mini-me.  What worked for me played to my strengths and worked in a time and place.  Even if I executed exactly as I did some years ago, the dynamics and circumstances could have changed and hence the same approach, by the same person, executed the same way, isn’t guaranteed to work.  I encourage clients to identify their strengths and play to them, this generates small and large wins that build confidence and momentum.

One other unique aspect I would say is addressing belief paradigms and the battle between the conscious and unconscious mind.  The unconscious is supposed to protect us and keep us safe from the unknown or re-experiencing something that put us in harm’s way.  Sometimes, those belief paradigms serve us well, other times they’re holding us back, and we need someone outside our head to encourage us to push past them. Once we’ve pushed past them and succeed, our subconscious accepts a new normal and will no longer generate the very real physical manifestation of pain, anxiety, etc. in its attempts to discourage us from going for it!

What other value do you bring to help authentically empower others?

I like to describe our company as a passionate and enthusiastic bunch who enjoy empowering organizations and the people in them, to meet with greater success.  How we help, is by lending support and expertise in four key areas; communications, training, employee engagement, and performance.  What we do essentially is to help organizations and the people in them better communicate, collaborate, and generate extraordinary results, both within the organization and with their customers.  As an example, to kick off the new year in 2019, we’re doing training for entrepreneurs and small business that is open to the general public.  We’re helping them craft messages to effectively promote their business in public and close the sale while building their confidence. Many wonderful people are great artisans, service people, or craftspeople, but they are not salespeople and may never be. When you get big enough, you can pass on promoting your business in public and closing the sale of your widget or book to someone else. Until then, you need to get it done yourself, or risk being one of 50% of businesses who fail within the first five years. Often, the failure has nothing to do with the service or product they provide, the challenge is their inability to sell it.  It’s also heart-wrenching to meet a perennial networker whose own inner circle is hard-pressed to describe what that person does!  Even with the best intentions, their inner circle doesn’t know how to promote their fellow networker because they don’t have clear messaging regarding just what they do or sell.  Our event will empower these folks to conquer their fear of public speaking, promote their business and close the sale. Together we’ll craft engaging value propositions, elevator speeches, and on stage / public presentations in a 3-day over 4-weeks experiential learning workshop.

How do you balance food, faith, finance, and family in the 21st century?

Balance to me means you acknowledge the importance of different aspects of a full, and well-functioning life.  That involves setting goals and executing them in each area.  Food is your body’s enricher.  Garbage in, garbage out. Plan and do the work to eat well.  Faith, if you’re blessed with it, will help you better appreciate you’re a spiritual being having a human experience, not the other way around.  That said, take care of your body such that you have a place to carry your inner being, while having the strength and wellness to do, and experience, all that you can on this journey.  Finance is an enabler; it’s not the most important thing in one’s life, but it’s right up there next to oxygen! Family love you, often unconditionally.  It’s hard to find a stronger set of raving fans.  Schedule time together, even if it’s the most mundane “I drive you to x event”, and “mom drives you to y event”.  Put down the smartphone and talk to each other, be present.  Schedule couple time/family time with as much commitment as you would the most important thing you have to do because it is.

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I hate Valentine’s Day. The pressure to buy roses, chocolates, a card, go out for dinner, or cook a romantic meal, with wine, sensual music, and rose petals scattered all over the home to get into the mood…. Ok, wake up reality is here. Busy lives, busy careers, kids’ events, aging parents, and the stress of life is a romance killer.

A new relationship is frantic, enchanting, and electrifying. You do all these amazing romantic gestures towards one another, giddy with excitement, thrilled to know you have found an amazing person that loves you unconditionally and makes you feel special and alive.

However, as time passes by, everything becomes routine and boring. You are in the comfortable stage of a relationship. Therefore, you have to put an effort to keep the excitement going. You do not want to pull away from one another but rather be close. Here are some tips to keep the romance alive in your relationship.

Romance needs gratitude to thrive

In a relationship, taking each other for granted is the poison. Gratitude is the antidote. Gratitude helps you to hold on to your partner and be more romantic. Be grateful you have a partner in your life.

Patience does wonders for romance

We are a generation that was raised on fast food, drive-throughs, upgrading our cell phone and changing a car every few years. Sometimes we bring that same mentality into our relationship. Things are not working; I am too busy and on and on we go. Relax be patient and see how romance can bloom.

Gentleness means you need to practice humility

Try to be kind to your partner. Consider him better. Maybe you do not have to be right all the time, just to win an argument. Be kind and love unconditionally.

Romance loves a sense of humor

Have a funny name for one another. Crack a joke. The use of positive humor is good for intimacy.

Romance thrives on surprises

Do something different this week. If your spouse does the grocery shopping, you do it this week. Do chores around the home as your partner will appreciate it and romance will thrive.

Do things separately for romance to flourish

It is important to do things together. It is critical that you pursue hobbies and interests individually. This will give you topics to talk about.

Focus on the positive in your partner

Is your partner good at something? Tell him. If she is excelling at her job, let her know that. As you focus on the positive qualities of your partner, it will remind you of why you fell in love in the first place. You have the chance daily from morning until night to offer words of admiration, tribute, and affirmation that is valuable.

Buy gifts for one another

Put some thought into this and buy something personal. If your partner likes art and to paint, go and buy him some brushes and paint. This shows you have been thinking about him.

Romance adores compliments and appreciation

After a while, we can take our partner for granted. If she looks beautiful. Tell her. Run your hand through her hair. Kiss her and give her a compliment. We humans need to stay connected and love praise and positive feedback.

Send this post to them

This will send a message that this is what you want them to know and who knows you will get more love than you ever got.

Leave notes in a sticky

Leave a love note on the fridge, in the bedroom, a card or a voice mail. Let your partner know you love them, you care for them, they are awesome and you will be there for them no matter what.  Or just send a nice romantic text to them.

Spend time together

Life is fast-paced and everyone wants our attention. Never make your relationship a low priority. You have to feed it, nourish it for it to grow. The only way to do it is to spend quality time together.

Plan romantic getaways

Once in a while go for a massage together, spend the weekend at a bed and breakfast or just go out for a lovely meal. It allows you to get away and focus on each other and your needs.

Talk daily

You connect when you talk. Talk about your day, what is going on, what is bothering you and what you want from each other for this relationship to grow.

Forgive often

The number one killer of romance is resentment and lack of forgiveness. It builds a wall. Forgive daily. We hurt the people that we love the most. As a couple, it is natural that you will hurt each other daily and very often.

Binge on the weekend

Pick a weekend and plan to do nothing except watch romantic movies on TV. You will feel refreshed, revitalized and closer.

Touch often and be intimate

Intimacy and touch are vital for a long term healthy relationship. Intimacy is nurturing, connecting, being vulnerable, real and communicating your deep desires and issues.

Be positive

Your partner is not perfect. Every human has annoying habits that drive their partner nuts. Never be quick to criticize. Always try to understand where the other person is coming from. Look at every situation from a positive perspective.

Stop pursuing perfection

The number one destroyer of relationships is perfection. Nothing is perfect. Accept the imperfections in life and in your partner.

Let go of unrealistic expectations

Take all your unrealistic expectations that you brought into the relationship and put it in a box. Never ever open it again. He will never complete you. No one ever lives happily ever after. Life happens.

The secret of romance is to give

The people who give the most are the happiest. The secret to living, where romance is thriving is giving. Give it to your partner and make her your number one priority. Go out of your way to make sure she feels secure, loved and wanted.

Kiss passionately

Forget the peck. Forget the short smooch. Make every kiss count with love and passion.

Be naughty

Go for a walk in your neighborhood. Look for spots where you can have a passionate kiss.

The post Maintain the Romance in Your Relationship With These 23 Tips appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

The Grand Palladium Vallarta Resort & Spa is a lavish, all-inclusive resort occupying a flourishing swatch of the manicured jungle with an enticing private beach, about a 45-minute drive from Puerto Vallarta. The 420 rooms have jetted tubs and furnished terraces and the master suites have outdoor whirlpools. Have a perfect Palladium romance day.

Before you read my review, I strongly recommend that you read my article on how to enjoy an all-inclusive vacation.

My review of this resort will be broken into the following sections:

Introduction

How to enjoy the food at this resort

The Chef’s table

Have a romantic day at the Palladium

Take in all the activities

Do a tour

In this section, I will guide you on how to have a romantic day at the Palladium Vallarta.

I would strongly recommend that you order room service for breakfast. Ask them to deliver a bottle of Moet & Chandon bottle.

After a nice and healthy breakfast go for a walk on the beach. Smell the fresh air and marvel at the beauty of the mountains in the distance.

On the beach, you might even notice a wedding taking place or preparation. Get inspired!

After you come back from your walk, call the Zentropia Spa and book a couple’s massage.

At the spa, have a swim, use the sauna and then head for a massage. Have a light lunch at the spa.

Walkthrough love street. It is an amazing experience.

Check out the zoo and look at the parrots who are in love.

It is late in the afternoon. Go for a nice siesta.

At around 8 pm head to Chef’s Table.

After dinner get entertained by Il Duvo.

Around 10 pm head to the adult section for a nice swim at the infinity pool.

Have a great time at the pool or head to your room. The possibilities are endless. If you want to get married, they even have a chapel. Have a great Palladium romance day.

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