Entrepreneurship is about creating value. It is about taking risks and bootstrapping. It is the framework for designing, launching, and running a new business. The creator of this business is called an entrepreneur. The entrepreneur has to make business decisions and deal with government policies, market demand, and economic crises. The entrepreneur has to focus on her core competence and create a competitive advantage to increase the footprint.

The entrepreneur acts on an idea and manages and oversees the launch and growth of her business. The entrepreneur has to develop a business plan, go alone or hire staff, work within her financial and material resources, look at her own skill sets, be a dynamic leader, see her attitude to risk, and take responsibility for failure or success.

Four Columns loves entrepreneurs who take risks, think outside the box, meet the needs of the market, are agile, and go above and beyond to surpass the expectations of the customer.

Jesselina started Pad2Go, Muskan Khanna owns a boutique tea store, Ashley is starting a beauty business, Paula Ariya owns a beauty salon, Mallory Aldred owns a food consulting business, and Anu Bidani is starting STEM, one of the fastest tech educational firms in North America. These women are game-changers on the cutting edge in their field, empowering women and making a difference in society.

From my perspective, too many entrepreneurs get so focused that they sacrifice many other important areas of their lives. Michelle runs The Balanced CEO, which is a place for entrepreneurs to become their best selves while growing their business. Michelle empowers you to create a strong mind, body, and soul connection so you can develop a positive mindset and focus on productivity while building consistent habits and routines, reduce stress, balance your well-being, and build a successful business with purpose.

Michelle talks about life, gratitude, self-reflection, and having balance in our lives.

Michelle, I am looking forward to interviewing you as we have so much in common. Tell me a little about you?

Thank you so much for interviewing me, Jerry! I was born and raised on a very small island known as St.Thomas, United States Virgin Islands. My mom is from Trinidad and my dad was from New York. Since 2014, I have been living in the states first in Virginia and now I am living in Maryland. I went to college to become a Pastry Chef and worked in that field for a while but later quit and started working in insurance and soon realized that I wanted nothing more but to become my own boss.

I am a big believer in having balance in your life. Walk me through how you came up with The Balanced CEO?

After being self-employed for a few years now I noticed that as much as I was passionate about building a successful business and doing it all, I quickly became overwhelmed and burnt out causing a toll on my health.

I was so focused on growing my business that I wasn’t paying attention to taking care of myself, my well-being, and other areas of my life.  

Once I started taking care of myself first I have become happier and healthier and able to function better, become more creative, and able to get through my to-do list a lot easier causing my business to grow faster.

Being an entrepreneur is one of the most rewarding jobs out there and to succeed starts with YOU. The more that we show love and care for our mind, body, and soul the more we can achieve because it will come from a place of balance. 

We aren’t here to just work but also to find the right balance to enjoy other things in life.

I know from personal experience that it is hard creating a balance between life and business but it is possible!

So, I created The Balanced CEO to provide inspiration, resources, tools, and tips to help entrepreneurs, bloggers, and content creators manage their mind, take care of themselves, become less overwhelmed, more productive, and become the best version of themselves all while building your dream business.

We all have so much potential within us and we can create the life we deserve but it all starts with ourselves.

At The Balanced CEO, it is all about implementing balance in the lives of us entrepreneurs who try to do it all.

Before I got married I did not know how to spell gratitude. I practice it daily. Your best practice is to practice gratitude daily. Talk to me about why and the after-effects?

I believe that there is ALWAYS something to be thankful for. No matter how hard your life is at the moment there is always a little something that you should be thankful for whether it is you have a warm place to live in, clothes on your back, food to eat, or waking up to see another day. People often focus on what they don’t have vs. what they do have. I believe that when times are tough and you shift your mindset to focus on what you do have you will become happy and fulfilled. It’s all about being mindful and appreciating life and everything it has to offer.

Balancing your mind, body, and soul is not easy. How did you achieve this at such an early stage in your life? For me, it has taken a lot of introspection?

This is something I am actually still working on and I do believe that we are always working on balancing our mind, body, and soul as the journeys in our life change.

I take it one day at a time now by creating habits and routines that help balance out my day. 

For my morning routine, I spend a few hours taking care of myself, mind, body, and soul first before jumping into work. I never used to do this and it has changed my life completely. I journal, read, workout, and make myself a healthy breakfast. My morning routine has helped me to become motivated and has given me the energy to start my workday with a positive attitude.

In the evening time, I “clock out” of work and I practice yoga then spend time with my husband. 

I have learned to appreciate the time I have in the day and not take it for granted but instead use my time wisely and create a work-life balance.

I have been a giver all my life without boundaries. However, it hurt me. Talk to me about loving ourselves, cutting negative relationships, and letting go of toxicity in our lives?

It is so important to love ourselves first, many people think it is selfish but it is 100% not selfish. To be full of bliss and balanced, we need to be happy with ourselves. In order, to help others and take care of others we have to take care of ourselves first. Learning to say no, cutting off negative relationships, or removing ourselves from any kind of negative environment will seem hard at first. You will feel guilty and your emotions will get the best of you. But, once you see how positively it impacts your mind and your life, it will get easier. At the end of the day, we have to live with ourselves no one else. So, choose to live it the way you want. Negative relationships bring you down and cause you to be negative as well putting a damper on your mind and your goals. You should always surround yourself with positive people. Why go through life being negative and living miserably?

I have met so many entrepreneurs who are successful financially but have messed up personal lives. Help me understand how does balance look like in their lives?

Money is important because we need it to survive and lots of us just want to be financially free. But, what is more, important is the people in our lives, our relationships, and our self-care. The money will always come and go but our family and friends, unfortunately, don’t live forever and we should never take that for granted. These entrepreneurs probably spent 24/7 working and even when they were with their families, work probably came first. There is always a way to have a work-life balance. You just have to figure out what works for you and your life.

Self-reflection is an amazing habit as long as it is done to see how you can help other people by becoming better… please explain?

Self-reflection is such a great way to slow down, practice self-care, and live in the present moment. Sometimes we get so caught up in our day-to-day and it’s like we are on autopilot. It causes us to become frustrated like we aren’t seeing any progress on our goals. But, if we take the time to reflect by journaling, looking at past pictures, or just meditating it will help us to reflect on our mistakes, see how far we come and if our daily tasks are aligned with our goals. Practicing self-reflection consistently will help us gain more clarity and peace in our lives.

In your opinion do we have a healthy relationship with social media? Does the dopamine effect of likes, shares, pins, and comments make it artificial, and is it healthy?

I believe that a lot of us don’t have healthy relationships with social media. Especially as entrepreneurs we are obsessing over our metrics (likes, share, engagement, etc).  And we tend to compare ourselves to others causing us to be less productive and strive for perfection. When perfection actually does not exist. We shouldn’t compare ourselves because all our journeys are different. We are all unique and can share our messages differently. We need to rewire our brains to learn to use social media as a tool to connect not compare.

Can anyone become an entrepreneur? Should they do a self-analysis and see if they have the skill sets?

I believe anyone can become what they want to be if they put their mind to it. But, entrepreneurship might not be for everyone. The long hours, the risk, and the mindset is hard. I know some people who never want to be an entrepreneur because they like structure and the stability of having a paycheck. So, yes a self-analysis is definitely a good idea. But, if you are determined to become an entrepreneur and realize you don’t have any skills, just learn. As entrepreneurs, we are constantly learning new skills as we wear many hats in the business. So, if you set your mind to something you can do it.

You are a woman after my own heart. You like food and carbs. Talk to me about your city where you live and the food scene?

I currently live in Maryland and I am near the DMV area (DC, Maryland, Virginia). There are so much different foods and cultures here and I love it. Being from the Caribbean it’s nice to have a lot of different foods that remind me of home. Also, I love the fact that I can find lots of healthy restaurants.

The post The Balanced CEO appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Healthy anger, healthy boundaries, and healthy eating are a holistic approach to life.  Valerie is a chiropractor, a great listener, and helps patients deal with the effects of lifelong stressors and traumas like abandonment, financial stress, bullying, divorce, immigration, and codependence. These can have a negative impact on a patient’s current health issues.

In this interview, we go into detail on expressing healthy anger, the importance of healthy boundaries, attachment to safe people, eating healthy, and pursuing a passion. Dr. Fitzpatrick gets real, vulnerable, and honest about her own challenges in understanding some of these issues. Relax, have your favorite drink, and read this interview a couple of times. Please comment on what made sense to you in this interview, and if there is anything else you want Valerie to cover in our next interview. 

Valerie, talk to me about the importance of expressing healthy anger. Please explain? 

Yes, expressing anger can be so healthy for the mind and the body.  Anger is often maligned, regarded as a bad or negative emotion. People often repress it, deny that it is even there, or hold it in for so long that they become sick. I have learned that expressing anger and getting it out can be healthy. I am not talking about acting out your anger, which is not healthy.  Acting out hurts others and does nothing to actually discharge or reduce your stress. Repression of anger hurts your body and has actually been linked to some cancers and some autoimmune diseases. A great book on this topic is “When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress” by Dr. Gabor Maté.

When I was going through a very challenging time in my life, it was a huge breakthrough for me to recognize the anger that I had, and to start expressing it in a healthy way. Discovering my anger really put a fire back in my soul. There were obviously some things that I couldn’t change for myself and my daughter, but there were some things that I still had control over. Anger helped me take my power back. I didn’t want to live in quiet resignation or as a victim.

Really there are no bad emotions, just badly expressed emotions. The therapist Dr. Joann Peterson said that anger is the energy Mother Nature gives us as little kids to stand forward on our own behalf and say I matter. She said that the difference between the healthy energy of anger and the hurtful energy of emotional and physical violence is that anger respects boundaries. Standing forward on your own behalf does not invade anyone else’s boundaries. She wrote a great little book called, “A Book about Anger, Boundaries and Safety”.

I liked that you mentioned the importance of healthy boundaries and attachment to safe people. What did you mean by those comments?

These were important lessons for me, and I think for a lot of people. Especially if you have lived with manipulative, abusive or unpredictable people.  To stay healthy emotionally and physically we need healthy boundaries and a sense of autonomy. Dr. Gabor Maté also talks about this in his book. It can be very helpful to ask yourself if you are doing unnecessary things for others? Are you feeling resentful as you help others? Do you know where your responsibilities end, and where the other person’s responsibilities begin? Basically, do you know where your boundaries lie?

It is a wonderful thing to help someone else when they are burdened, but we don’t need to take on their loads or responsibilities. Now I let God be God for me, and I let God be God for others. I am learning to live and let live. I am learning to let others have the opportunity to learn from their mistakes. It is not my responsibility to protect and shield everyone from discomfort or consequences. Protecting them may be preventing them from a valuable learning experience. I found the “Boundaries” series of books, by Dr.’s Henry Cloud and John Townsend to be very helpful.

To stay healthy, we also need a connection with safe people. “What is a safe person?”, you may ask. A safe person will not jump to conclusions about you, they will not be quick to judge, they will give you permission to be human and still feel lovable, they will speak the truth, and they will allow you to speak your truth as well, and they will want more and better things for your life. If you start to realize that someone is manipulative or unsafe, you can lovingly detach.

As a healthcare professional give me some advice on how to eat healthily?

Eating healthy is a contentious topic! I have my academic studies in nutrition, my ongoing reading of the research, and my personal experience. I have followed so many eating programs myself, and I have seen the results of different eating plans with my patients. I have come to realize that diet is very personal. There is no one plan that is going to work for everyone. There is a lot of dogma out there, and there are a lot of extreme diet systems that are just not sustainable or are just not suitable for everyone or at every stage of life. Sure, a certain diet may cause your complexion to be radiant or your clothes to fit better – but if you can’t form a coherent sentence, or your hair is suddenly falling out, you are not getting enough nutrients. There are so many different diet guidelines out there: eating for your blood type, veganism, vegetarianism, the Paleolithic diet, the raw food diet, the ketogenic diet, low FODMAP diet, low lectin diet, whole food plant-based diet, anti-inflammatory diet, etc. etc.  Each diet guideline may have its merits, but each of us is a product of our genetics, our environment, the eating patterns of our ancestors, and our own past or current illnesses. It can take a lot of trial and error to find out what works for you and your health goals eg. gaining muscle mass, losing fat, regulating blood sugars, reducing seizure frequency, reducing joint inflammation and pain. In a sense, a choice of diet should be mindful, intuitive, and flexible. If you get bloated or exhausted after certain foods or your joints are stiff and painful you may want to make some changes to your diet.  Certain food may be regarded as ‘healthy’, but it may not be healthy for you and your constitution, it may trigger some sensitivities for you. You may want to generally follow a diet plan but modify it for yourself, depending on how you feel. We don’t need rigidity or judgment about diet.

In our home we eat a pesco-vegetarian diet; we eat a lot of plant-based whole foods and have ocean fish about twice per week.  I originally switched to a vegetarian diet 28 years ago, but after a few months found it difficult to concentrate, so I added fish back into my diet. In the past 28 years, there have been two times where I added a little meat back into my diet for a few weeks because I was really feeling depleted and even having dreams about bacon!  So weird!

As a chiropractor, I don’t talk about meal plans very much but mostly give advice about increasing the good fats and oils which have an anti-inflammatory effect and reducing the bad fats which can increase inflammation and pain.

Please talk about the importance of pursuing your passions?

I think it is so important to ask yourself “What did I love doing when I was 10 years old?’”

What was your first passion, before the world got its hands on you? Did you love reading, drumming, writing poetry, gardening, scrapbooking, songwriting, playing guitar, dancing, acting, photography, makeup, making model trains, drawing action heroes, pottery, crochet? As humans, it is in our nature to create; it doesn’t matter if we can make a career of it. We can find affirmation of our sense of Self and we can boost our health through creativity and pursuing a passion. This is especially important for most women, a way of staying connected with the female soul. A long but worthwhile read is “Women Who Run with the Wolves”, by Clarissa Pinkola Estés. Creativity in any form can be therapeutic. It does not have to be pretty, impressive, appreciated, or understood by others. An inspiring read is “Art is a Way of Knowing; A guide to self-knowledge and spiritual fulfillment through creativity”, by Pat B. Allen.

I had loved art from childhood into my twenties, taking art and pottery courses, and painting for many hours at a time.  When I was going through a challenging time in my life a few years ago, I thought about art again, but I thought it was too late to start back, too much time had passed, and I probably didn’t have the ability anymore. I didn’t have time, and I was too busy already. I checked my art supplies and found that most of my old brushes were brittle and wrecked, and my paints had dried up. It would cost hundreds of dollars to re-stock everything. But then that new fire in me, told me “It’s now or never!”.

Obstacles will present themselves. I have learned to expect them, then find a way to deal with then.  It can be difficult to start; I totally get it. I went to the art store to buy supplies. Insecurity set in. I felt ridiculous:  a middle-aged suburban mom, at the art store where all the staff were in their early twenties with facial piercings and edgy outfits. There were new art products and mediums I had never seen before, and I didn’t know how to use them.  But the staff were great and encouraging. I bought new supplies and slowly started painting for a friend. My art skills were so rusty, but I persevered. I felt that I needed even more motivation, so I submitted some of my old art pieces for a local juried art show and got accepted! It was the push I needed to get over my creative hurdle.

So, I made some new paintings, I participated in the art show, I made new friends, I sold three paintings, and I made enough money to cover the cost of the art supplies I had just purchased. Since that time, I have taken three college courses at the Haliburton School of Art and Design and two courses with a local artist whom I admire very much.   I have learned spiritual and life lessons through my art instructors. My daughter and I have held two art shows in our home, inviting many friends and neighbors.  Regardless of whether a painting sells or not, it is wonderful to see a person connect with the art. I am happier and feeling more whole. I have made art on days that I felt completely frustrated, days I felt hurt, and days when I felt overflowing joy. Art has been my therapy and my means of self-expression. Spending time or money on your passion is never wasteful or silly.  Amazing things can happen to your mood and your health when you let go of the need for results, or perfection, or payment in an area of your life – when you do something just for the sake of following your passion.

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