At a recent coaching session, someone asked me to ‘define your why’. Out of more than fifteen participants, I was one of the few that defined my why.

During the coffee break, a few participants came up to me and asked how I arrived at my answer.

About a decade back, a mentor of mine challenged me to move from the success to the significant phase. I undertook a long detailed, personal, reflective, and introspective process that helped me understand my motivations, values, goals, and purpose in life.

I am going to outline the steps that will help you define your why. Later I will list the advantages of defining your why.

Self-reflection

The first thing I had to do was to write down what truly mattered to me. My wife, daughter, parents, health, job, friends, travel and blogging. I had to take into account my goals, values, passions, and the things that fulfilled me and had to make sure they were all aligned.

I want you to self-reflect on: What are your core values and principles? What activities or goals give you a sense of purpose and fulfillment? What are the things that you are most passionate about?

In order to define your why, self-reflection is a critical part of the process.

Identify your strengths and interests

To define your why, you need to focus on your skill set, talent, strengths, and your core competence.

What comes naturally to you? What are you good at? What do you enjoy doing the most?

Your why has to be aligned with your strengths and interests.

You might want to be a cop. Are you willing to work the night shift? Are you willing to shoot someone? Are you willing to see humans in their worst behavior?

No matter what you want to do it has to be in sync with your strengths.

Set goals to define your why

Set career, personal development, relationships, community involvement, and physical goals in every area of your life. You need a holistic approach to life. These holistic goals will be the drivers in defining your why. These goals need to have a meaning.

Defining your why requires you to think about your legacy

To define your why, you have to consider your legacy.

Legacy involves reflecting on the impact you want to have on the world and how you will be remembered. What impact do you want to make on the world or the people around you?

Legacy is often built on the principles that matter most to you. I strongly recommend that you cultivate important relationships and look at the impact you have on their lives. Think of sharing your skills, expertise, and knowledge with others. Get involved in mentoring, teaching, or contributing to educational initiatives. The knowledge you pass on to the next generation can be a lasting legacy.

Seek inspiration

Read books, and articles, and watch videos about topics you know nothing about. Engage in conversations with people from different backgrounds and cultures. Take walks in nature or urban areas to observe different settings.

Write it down

Come up with a mission statement for your life.  This statement can serve as a reminder and guide for your decisions and actions. I would strongly recommend that you share your why statement with a close friend or mentor. Ask them for their feedback and if it is realistic and doable. You will be surprised that an outside perspective can help you refine and clarify your why.

Embrace growth and change

Once you define your why, it may evolve over time as you learn, grow, and experience new things. It’s important to be open to change and adjust your why as needed.

Take action

Your “why” should drive your actions and decisions. Use it as a compass to make choices that align with your values and purpose.

Finding your “why” is an evolving, growing, continuing process. You have to accept the fact that it may take time to fully articulate and understand it.  Defining your why is about uncovering what truly motivates and inspires you, and using that as a guide to live a more meaningful and fulfilling life.

It is important to define your why for several reasons

Understanding your why gives your life purpose and meaning. It helps you to find a reason to get out of bed every day and pursue your goals and dreams.

Knowing your why can be a powerful source of motivation. When you have a clear understanding of why you are doing something, you are more likely to stay motivated and persistent in the face of challenges and obstacles.

Your why serves as a guiding light, helping you make decisions, set priorities, and keep you focused on what truly matters to you.

When you define your why, you are better equipped to handle setbacks and failures and it makes you resilient.

Being aware of your why allows you to reflect on your core values and beliefs. When you live in alignment with your values, you experience greater satisfaction and well-being.

Comprehending your why can serve as a powerful filter for decision-making. It can help you make choices that are in line with your long-term goals and desires. When you are clear about your values and priorities, you can communicate them effectively to others, and this can lead to more meaningful and harmonious relationships.

Exploring your why can be a journey of self-discovery. It can help you understand yourself better, including your strengths, weaknesses, and passions. It allows you to make choices and take actions that contribute positively to the world and lea

Living in alignment with your why often leads to greater happiness, well-being,  contentment, and life satisfaction.

In summary, knowing your why in life provides a sense of purpose, motivation, direction, and resilience. It can help you make better decisions, improve your relationships, and contribute to your overall well-being. It’s a fundamental aspect of personal development and self-awareness.

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