The journey of Amanda Buchanan is anything but ordinary. The oldest of 7 siblings, she just thought it was “normal” to take responsibility and take charge. It wasn’t until later in life that she realized her “bossiness” was actually a manifestation of her leadership & executive management skills, which had been evident at a young age. It was only in her late twenties that someone used the word “leader” in relation to her influence and skills, and since that time, she has not only leaned into her own leadership but also championed other women to do so as well. Her work experience and personal story became the catalyst for a decade-long partnership with coaching. This journey not only reshaped her career but also strengthened her identity, values, and voice as a woman navigating male-dominated spaces.

At Four Columns of a Balanced Life, we believe every woman carries a story worth learning from. One that can spark transformation, courage, and clarity for others. Today, we dive into the heart of Amanda’s journey as a life coach and leader.

In this conversation, I wanted to know something unique about her—what shaped her, what ignited her passion, and what continues to fuel her mission to guide women and leaders toward authenticity, awareness, and wholeness. Amanda brings a blend of spiritual wisdom, clinical insight, and real-world leadership experience that makes her coaching style deeply human and refreshingly practical.

Her story is a reminder that empowerment doesn’t begin when we “have it all together,” but when we’re willing to grow, ask better questions, and lead from who we truly are.

What inspired you to become a life coach, and was there a defining moment that led you down this path?

In my late 20s, I found myself in a leadership position where I was way over my head. Not only did I need to learn new skills, but I was working way too much. I was so desperate for help that when someone offered to connect me with a coach, I said yes, not even fully understanding what coaching was. I just knew counselling wasn’t what I needed. I have had a coach for the last decade and never looked back! The journey was transformative, not only for my leadership and my life, but for my career trajectory.

Amanda can you be more specific about the changes you saw back then?

There was a huge learning curve in self-awareness [think Myers-Briggs, personal values, strengths, spiritual gifts, motivations; to name a few] and how this impacted my leadership. I learned to adapt and consider what other people needed and expected from me, and lean into how I was wired to lead from a place that was authentic to me. I started to understand that work could not consume me, but I was actually a better leader when I was living a life that was fuller, by developing creative outlets, physical care and a supportive social system. I fully believe that the best gift a leader can give their organization is holistic health. I could keep going, but I’ll stop there. 

What is the difference between coaching, counselling and consulting? 

At a basic level: counselling looks at the past and coaching looks ahead to the future. Counselling might ask: where did you come from? And what happened to you to shape who you are today? Coaching will ask: where do you want to be in a year, or three years and how do you get there? Or who do you want to be in a particular situation? Both counselling and consulting place the expectation of expertise on the consultant or counsellor. Good coaching makes the one being coached the expert, and with wise questions and observations helps the coachee discover things about themselves.

How has your own personal growth journey shaped the way you coach others?

I am a female who worked in a male-dominated field and I had to push through a lot of obstacles and stereotypes about what was “appropriate” for a woman to do, as well as what was considered “feminine” or not. For example: the fact that many times for women confidence and assertiveness often times is mistaken for aggression or even said to be “masculine.” Or the shame many women feel when their emotions emerge in a work-place setting, when in reality their emotions can be a gift to their colleagues if they have done the work of self-awareness and staying healthy. I am particularly passionate about helping people learn to bring their full-selves to the teams they are on and to lead from their strengths.

How would you describe your coaching style, and what makes it unique?

I’ve been told that people experience me as if we are having a very natural conversation with a lot of good questions to draw out some reflection and discovery. When appropriate I will ask if I can share my own experience with something that may help the client or offer a different perspective on a situation. I believe that every human being is put on this earth with something unique to offer the world and coaching is the process to bring clarity and focus to that discovery. Because of this, I also consider spiritual wellness an important aspect of health and wellness. My training in psychotherapy also helps to inform how things from our past influence our perspective. 

There are many life coaches out there, but I get such energy from working with leaders (which can be formal or informal leadership, influence and management…and yes…mom’s out there are leading their kids every day, so that counts too!) and helping them to discover their unique leadership style and develop needed skills. This tends to also spill out into other areas of their life, as who a leader is affects how their organizations grow and develops. 

What is the most common obstacle your clients face, and how do you help them overcome it?

I’m going to address this from two perspectives: internal factors and external factors. 

Internal factors are often times around limiting beliefs or internal narratives: confidence/imposter syndrome and the stories we tell ourselves that make us feel inadequate or unqualified. For women particularly there are often times narratives they have absorbed subconsciously that manifest due to their work challenges. Through coaching we identify these and work to process and replace them with empowering narratives that are authentic to who they feel that they are. 

External factors can include transitions in work or life, such as a promotion or a job that has grown to include more than a person feels qualified for. In these situations, we create a growth plan and identify areas and resources for development and implementation.

Can you share a success story where your coaching made a significant impact on someone’s life?

A success story for me is watching a client have an “ah-ha” moment in a session or pieces or themselves “click into place” and they leave a session with new insights and actions to work through.

A client success story? One client came to me with a lot of confusion about her role in the organization and a lack of clarity about how to prioritize her time. After six months of monthly one-on-one coaching, we celebrated together how much more confident she felt in her role and in her leadership. She reflected that she had a renewed sense of excitement for the changes ahead in her organization and how she would navigate those with her team and influence her peers and boss. She was grateful for the clarity she had about her role and also about what wasn’t her role [which is just as important] and how to have conversations that would shape the culture and changes going forward.  

What advice would you give to someone who is feeling stuck or unfulfilled in their life or leadership?

It happens to most of us: at some point we will likely hit a wall of some kind where what we know or how we did things, is no longer working for us. This is the season that reaching out for help is one of the best things you can do for yourself and the people around you! This is where finding a coach instead of a counsellor is going to make the biggest difference. Hear me: I love counselling, and even trained to be one, and it has its’ place. But stuck-ness in the present moment is going to need a coaching approach, not a counselling approach: one that helps you shift your thinking out of your past/present into present/future possibilities. ASK yourself to answer these two questions on a scale of 1-10: how much do you want your life to be different in a year and how willing are you to change it? If the answer is AN 8…you are probably READY for a coach!

How can someone identify if they truly need a life coach, and what should they look for when choosing one?

I think coaching (life or leadership coaching) is most effective when someone is ready for things to be different and ready to do the work to make it different. Maybe a person is feeling stuck, or maybe they are simply just feeling like things are the same and they want things to be different in a year. Either way, coaching is helpful as a thought-process through wise and intentional questions to allow time for thinking and reflection, leading to insights and action. I think many people live life like it is happening to them, when in reality, you can choose where you focus and who you become. We have plans for our finances and our retirement, why do we not have plans for the type of people we want to be, or who we want to be as a leader or manager? 

If I was looking for a coach, I’d definitely look for someone you think you can trust and be fully open with – where there is some chemistry. I would also probably tend to encourage people to work with someone who may have experience in areas they wish to grow, but this isn’t a hard and fast rule. That’s why most coaches offer a 15-minute free discovery call to explore questions and chemistry.

What daily habits or mindset shifts do you recommend for personal growth and resilience?

Curiosity is the biggest mindset shift, I think especially for women. We tend to make value judgements on everything, even ourselves (I’m thinking here those statements: “I am too much,” or “not enough”). When I shift from judging…to being curious about what is happening inside and outside, it makes me willing to explore where those thoughts come from or interact with someone different from me, rather than be intimidated or to be hard on myself. 

Finding time to give attention to what is going on inside of you is a really important: for some this might be quiet time in the morning or evening, for others this could be walking without listening to a podcast. You need to pay attention to the affect your life is having on you or you wake up one day wondering how you “got here” or (in worst cases) can’t get out of bed because your life has become too much. As a person of faith, I think reminding myself daily that I am valuable and loved because of who I am and not what I do for others is critical. 

How do you balance your professional life as a coach with your personal life?

This may be a controversial statement but I think that balance is a bit of an illusion and has become a burden because it feels like it creates polarities (you either have balance or you don’t). For me, the question is more about living integrated or living from wholeness. For example, when I am in a season of high demand (stress or busyness) often times my time and desire for my normal workout routine would diminish. But instead of giving it up completely, I make it my goal to do something active with less intensity (or less time). Sometimes that means I schedule a “walking meeting” with a client or I would do 25 minutes of exercise rather than the hour because I refused to let what was important to me be taken away completely. I still try to live into all the parts of myself all the time, but the intensity shifts with the season. It is not so much balanced living as living-whole; with every part of my life activated.

What role does self-care play in achieving life goals, and what practices do you personally follow?

Ruth Haley Barton says that the best gift we offer to others is our transformed self, which means our entire self needs attention. We are constantly being and becoming and every season demands different types of growth and/or rest. Personally, I have something called “rule of life”; if you imagine that every season of your life requires different fruit/strengths from you, then you need to decide how you are going to grow and nurture your roots. What inputs do you need for this next season? What rhythms?  What disciplines? This can include everything from spiritual practices (prayer and meditation), physical exercise, creativity & play and social events. 

If you could give one piece of empowering advice to your younger self, what would it be? 

Don’t be so hard on yourself, you are actually doing really great!

The post Amanda Buchanan: Living & leading with Clarity, Confidence & Compassion appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Change in life refers to the process of transformation or transition from one state to another. It can happen in many areas, including personal growth, relationships, career, health, or even one’s mindset. Life changes can be planned, like moving to a new city or starting a new job, or they can be unexpected, like facing loss or a sudden opportunity.

Adapting to change in life can be challenging, but it is a crucial skill for growth and resilience. The first step is acknowledging that change is inevitable and resisting it can lead to more stress. Acceptance allows you to focus on how to deal with the new situation rather than dwelling on how things used to be. View change as an opportunity for growth, learning, or improvement.

Flexibility in your mindset and actions is key to adapting. Life rarely goes exactly as planned, so being able to adjust your goals, routines, and expectations can make transitions smoother. Break down the change into manageable parts. Focusing on small, actionable steps can reduce feelings of overwhelm and help you gradually adapt to new circumstances. Every change, whether positive or negative, offers lessons. Reflect on what you can learn from the situation and how it can help you grow personally or professionally.

Sharing your feelings or seeking advice from friends, family, or mentors can provide emotional support. If the change demands new skills or knowledge, take proactive steps to learn. During times of change, it’s easy to feel powerless. Focusing on aspects you can control, such as your attitude, effort, and actions, helps you feel more empowered and less anxious.

Sheenia is a blogger from Live Love & Blossom a lifestyle blog focusing on personal growth and intentional living.  She talks to Four Columns about her blog and the life changes.

Sheenia, a pleasure to have you on Four Columns. Could you tell my audience something unique about you?

Thanks for having me, Jerry. Wow… I love this question because I think we’re all unique in our way. One of the things that make me unique is that I’m a daydreamer. I love being alone so I can daydream and get lost in my thoughts. Sometimes, my daydreams grow into stories—and then I write them down for others to read and enjoy. I think most writers and creatives often daydream—that’s where a lot of great ideas are born.

I was hoping you could help me understand how writing is a therapy for you.

I’ve always loved writing since childhood. I remember rushing home every day after school so I could pull out my diary and start writing… For me, writing is therapeutic because it helps me understand myself better. It allows me to process my thoughts and feelings, and healthily release my emotions. Writing is a form of self-care and self-discovery. When I don’t prioritize my writing, I start to feel lost and off-center. I’ve found that the more I write, the more I heal and grow.

Walk me through how your blog helps your audience navigate life. 

Live Love & Blossom is a lifestyle blog dedicated to personal growth and intentional living. We cover topics on self-care, self-love, faith, family, and self-development. On my blog, I like to combine my personal experiences, along with research, to share relatable tips and ideas that will help my audience navigate the highs and lows of everyday life.

In life and work the only constant is change. Give my audience advice on how to navigate change in life. 

This is an interesting topic because I recently published an article about navigating change and life transitions. Personally, this current season of my life has been all about learning to embrace change and flexibility. So, I think that’s the key—having an understanding that life is change and being able to embrace flexibility throughout your journey. I highly recommend reserving quiet time to be alone, for self-reflection and meditation. If you’re expecting a significant change soon, you should give yourself time and space to process your emotions. This can help mentally prepare and strengthen you for the changes that lie ahead. Also, I’d like to remind everyone (including myself) that although change is usually scary, it can be a good thing in the end.

Is happiness and joy the same thing? Is happiness elusive?

Hmm… let me think about it for a second… No, I wouldn’t say that happiness and joy are the same thing. I think happiness is a more detailed and short-term feeling. Joy, on the other hand, is a more long-term inner state of being. For example, I recently lost my grandmother. So, I’m not particularly feeling “happy” at the moment. However, I still have joy because my grief doesn’t negate my many blessings. I also have joy because my grandmother lived a long, fulfilling life. So, I’m outwardly sad because of her passing, but my internal joy remains. It can be easy to confuse happiness and joy sometimes, but I think they’re different when you think about it.

Self-love and self-care are just buzzwords or important in life. What are some practical ways we can practice both? 

With the rise of social media, we hear the words self-love and self-care fairly often. However, contrary to what some people may think, self-love and self-care are more than just trendy terms. I struggled with low self-worth for several years. I felt like I was drowning in a sea of insecurities. Then, God led me on a journey to self-love, and it changed my life. Self-love and Self-care are both essential for our health and happiness—and they often go hand in hand. Some practical ways we can practice self-love and self-care are by establishing healthy boundaries, engaging in positive self-talk, connecting with nature, and being mindful of both the foods and media that we consume.

 How have marriage and motherhood changed you?

I married my high school sweetheart nearly 20 years ago, and we share a beautiful daughter. I’ve changed in many ways since becoming a wife and mom. For starters, I’m a lot less selfish than I used to be. Having a family has taught me about compromise, sacrifice, and prioritizing other people’s needs and interests. Marriage and motherhood both require a lot of work, which naturally develops patience and growth. Altogether… I’m better, stronger, and happier than before.

Advise yourself at 19, 29 and 39.

I’d tell the 19-year-old version of me to fall in love with herself before anyone else. Additionally, I’d tell her to not compare herself to others because everyone’s journey is unique. I’d tell the 29-year-old version of me to not allow society to dictate her happiness. I’d advise her to believe in herself and her choices and to be OK with living a life that others may not understand. As for my 39-year-old self… Well, that’s the current version of me. There are so many things I’d tell myself at this age. But the most important piece of advice I’d give myself now would be to trust in God’s timing. Even though waiting is hard, I’m learning that God’s plan is perfect and greater than mine.

What does women’s empowerment mean to you?

For me, women’s empowerment is all about improving the way we think and feel about ourselves and our choices. Feeling empowered means loving myself, being confident in the pursuit of my goals, and living a life that feels true to my values. I think women’s empowerment involves giving others the hope and inspiration to live their lives freely and authentically.

Talk to me a little about the city you live in, the food scene, and why we should visit. 

I live in the suburbs of Dallas, TX. The area I reside in has a nice historical vibe. It is a college town, having several state universities, which makes it entertaining. It is also known for its musical heritage and artistic downtown buildings. If you’re ever in the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex, I’m sure you’d enjoy our burgers, barbecue, and Tex-Mex cuisine.

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There is a reason I have listed the three together. I am being practical here. I cannot expect you to exercise and meditate daily in the morning. So try one of the above.

Regular exercise is good for you. Exercise releases feel-good endorphins and other natural brain chemicals. The morning is the conclusive time to energize your muscles through, weights, stretching, cardio, or walking.

The Mayo Clinic states that meditation gives you a sense of tranquility that is good for your physical, and mental health and emotional well-being.

The John Hopkins Institute states that listening to music exercises the brain and reduces blood pressure, anxiety and pain.

Research has shown that listening to music can reduce anxiety, blood pressure, and pain as well as improve sleep quality, mood, mental alertness, and memory.

The habits of exercising, meditating, and listening to music regularly will empower and transform you and result in better health, sleep, and mental alertness.

Check your emails, Read up on Your Industry

Stop looking at your smartphone first thing in the morning. Get up early, exercise, meditate, have a healthy breakfast and now look at your emails. Read up on what is happening in your industry. Watch a motivational video to prepare you for the day. This will transform and empower you to get ready for the day and give you the power of how you want to feel. Do not focus on social media to validate yourself.

Be around positive people. Remember I did not say, perfect people. It is essential to surround yourself with positive people because this habit will empower and transfer you to lasting success. Positive people are the catalyst to encourage you to become better and to deal with your daily challenges.

Positive people are in touch with reality. Positive people have your best interest at heart and want you to become better daily. This daily encouragement allows you to achieve your goals. You feel better about yourself and are full of energy.

Positive people are like honey. Everyone is drawn to them. Set yourself up for success. Surround yourself with positive people and become empowered and transform yourself to become a successful person.

Self-care is empowering and can transform you

What is self-care? Self-care is the intentional and concerned process of taking care of and improving your mental, emotional, physical, financial, and spiritual health with a balanced lifestyle. Self-care is taking care of yourself and it is very important. Self-care means taking good care of yourself. It is also about being kind to yourself and practicing self-compassion. However, not everything like drugs, alcohol, over-eating, or risk-taking that feels good is self-care. There is a big difference between self-care and unhealthy coping mechanisms. Self-care is good for you and has long-term benefits for the mind and the body.

The moment we align our goals, values, and ethos with our job, friends, charitable giving, and the various organizations that we are part of, cognitive dissonance disappears. We are happy. We live purpose-driven life. Everything makes sense.

Allow time for your body and brain to recharge. Reward yourself by relaxing, going for a massage, visiting a spa, or going for a swim and this will empower and transform you.

Have a few close and trusted friends

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Brian McAuley is a senior sales executive in the IT industry.  I sit down with him to get some advice on how to be successful in sales.

Brian, please tell my audience a little about you?

I’m a husband of Jenn for over 23 years, and a father to 3 boys ranging from 12 to 20. I’m active in my community by serving at my local church.  I chair the board at the Alzheimer’s Society of Durham Region, and serve as a director of another charity board.

Professionally I’m a technology sales leader with over 20 years of experience who has enjoyed selling industry and technology solutions at the boardroom level across various verticals. I try to maintain a reputation as a collaborative leader who builds trust with clients, partners, and colleagues. I’ve served in various senior business development and management roles at IBM for over 12 years, led teams at Bell Canada, completed the sales turnaround in a software company specializing in healthcare solutions, as well as took a sabbatical from corporate to re-focus a not-for-profit.

What are some of the qualities one needs to have to be great at sales?

First off, you need to be a good listener.  Far too many salespeople fill the air with their own talking, but the sales profession is all about understanding needs. Customers need to know that you genuinely care, and have their best interests in mind.  Secondly, you have to be good at execution, meaning, you need to have a plan, and be able to be organized and intentional about getting things done.  Thirdly, you need to work well with others and recognize how to leverage the strengths of others.  I truly believe in the saying “if you want to go fast, go alone but if you want to go far, go together”.  Success is never achieved alone.

You worked in the non-profit and then came back to the corporate world.  How was that experience?

Making the transition to a different sector was both rewarding and challenging.  Taking the assignment was a risky one, but I’m grateful for what I learned, and for what I was able to contribute.  There are many transferable skills from one sector to the other, but business disciplines need to be applied differently in the not-for-profit (NFP). There is rigor in business that is not as easily digestible in NFP. In business, it’s all about results and metrics. In NFP, metrics are important, but the mission and relationships take precedence.  The velocity with which you can accomplish things in business, can’t always be achieved in the NFP sector – simply because the culture is not the same.  Reaching agreement through consensus is vitally more important.  The personal rewards received in changing or saving a life can’t be matched.  Great experience.

You talk a lot about approaching everything with abundance. Please explain?

We live in a world where, generally, everyone holds the belief that more is better. With that belief, we carry with us, thoughts that repeat in our heads saying “if I just had more X, then life would be easier”. If you had more in your bank account, a bigger house, a better car, more education, less stress, etc.  When we look around at others, we begin to feel inadequate.  I latched on to a saying years ago that said: “Comparison kills contentment”. On Monday, you can be completely thrilled with your “new to you” 3-year-old used car, until Ken and Barbie drive up next to you at the stoplight in their brand new convertible.  Or, you’re so proud of losing five pounds, until the next person loses ten.

Begin or end each day by being thankful for the details of what you’ve been blessed with.  Getting started is the hardest, but after a few weeks of writing a couple down each day, you will start to look at your world differently, and realize how much you actually have, without even looking at physical things.  You will start to look at relationships as your assets, the gift of encouragement that someone gave you, or the feeling you got for being able to help someone else out in your day.  Your abundance mindset will have you starting to look at the world not by what you don’t have, but by what you have and what you can give to others.  Oftentimes, we don’t recognize our unique gifts – a special skill, a piece of knowledge, undivided attention, or an encouraging word.

How has being a husband and father changed you?

When you become a husband, you transition from only thinking about your needs, to thinking about the needs of your spouse. When you have children, you transition further again and gain a greater sense of responsibility to not only provide physically but emotionally and spiritually for your whole family.  All the investments made in you now need to be imparted to others. Your life is now intertwined with others. Like a new recipe you’re trying for the first time, all the good (and the not so good) come together in a big mixing bowl with the strengths (and weaknesses) of your spouse, to form a new mixture. To make the new recipe work, you need to play with the ingredients. To make it all work, there becomes some give and take, and the ability to say “I’m not perfect, you’re not perfect, but together we are much better”. So, being a father and husband has humbled me and made me more grateful for my family who makes me a better version of myself.

Give my audience some sane financial advice?

I believe that making manageable changes, consistently over time, delivers the best results.  Someone once said, “It takes at least 20 years to become an overnight success”. Give away 10% of your income to help others and the charities you are most passionate about. Save 10% of what you make, consistently over your career.  But do the first two before you spend on yourself.  Often time, we set goals that are too big and fail.  Small sacrifices, consistently over time, pay big dividends in the long run.  Seek wise counsel. Only invest your money with someone who makes their money not by making a commission on what investments they sell you, but by the returns and the growth in your portfolio. Don’t carry a credit card balance. Buy your first house as early as you can. Learn to deny yourself luxuries until the staples are in place.

Tell me a good sales joke?

Ha – I actually respect your readers too much to share a sales joke.  I have yet to hear one that isn’t really corny.

How do you balance faith, finance, family, and food in the 21st century?

You create balance by putting priorities in their place and allowing everything else to fit around them. Priorities are established based on your values. For example, if I told you that my faith was important to me, but I never made it to church because of sports, would you say my priorities were in line with my stated values? Probably not.  I balance my life by prioritizing what I value and being intentional through my goals and actions. My faith is important to me, so I make sure I start each day by reading scripture and spending time in prayer.  I do it not because anyone says I have to, but because I need that time in order to stay connected to my faith, which I value so much.  I value my family, so I spend a lot of time with them. I value financial stability, so I make sure I save, and I don’t overspend, but I make sure I enjoy the fruits of my labor. Food – I don’t know what to say about that. Food for me isn’t important unless it’s shared around a table with those I love.

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Parenting has taken on a whole new meaning during Covid 19.

Parents, caregivers, and children across the country are facing challenges and have to constantly pivot during the lockdown.

Focus on creating quality time and make sure your children are connected with family, friends, and neighbors through social media, chats, phones, and email.

Go on walks with your children while maintaining a safe distance.

Listen to understand your children, focus on their positive behavior and be a role model.

I talk to Brett about mental health and parenting.

Brett Ullman travels North America speaking to teens, young adults, leaders, and parents on topics including sexuality, mental health, men, dating, and media. Brett’s seminars engage and challenge attendees to try and connect our ancient faith with the modern culture we live in. Participants are inspired to reflect on what we know, what we believe, and how our faith ought to serve as the lens through which we view and engage in tough conversations in our society today.

Husband to Dawn and father of Bennett and Zoe, Brett and his family make their home in Ajax, Ontario where Brett leads and directs Worlds Apart, a charity focused on empowering individuals to re-align their lives with Biblical core values often muddled by media but central to Christian living.

Brett was a teacher with the Toronto District School Board for 10 years before moving into speaking full-time back in 2005. Brett has a Master’s degree in Evangelism and Leadership from Wheaton Graduate School in Chicago and is also a graduate of the Arrow Leadership Program. He and his family are members of Sanctus Church in Ajax since 2004. I catch up with Brett to talk about mental health and parenting.

Brett, please tell my audience a little about you?

My name is Brett Ullman. My wife (Dawn) and I live in Ajax, Ontario with our 2 teenagers Zoe (16) and Ben (15). I was a teacher with the TDSB (Toronto District School Board) for 10 years before leaving teaching 13 years ago to speak full-time. My speaking had started the year I began teaching and had grown to the point where I was teaching full-time and speaking 45 dates a year across Canada and the US. I speak on current issues from parenting, mental health, dating, media, faith, sex, men, and pornography.

I have a 14-year daughter, what is the best advice you can give me?

There is a quote from the book “Trophy Child” from Ted Cunningham that says “They will not be with me forever so I will prepare them accordingly.” This would be my best advice … prepare your daughter for life, don’t protect her from life. We seem to see an epidemic of over-parenting (which is rooted in fear-based parenting) throughout our society. If 4 years from now she heads away for school she better be ready to deal with everything from good online digital citizenship, dealing with sex and pornography, dealing with money, all aspects of dating, etc.

As a side point, I would say go and tell her that you love her. I am blown away on an ongoing basis by how many young girls tell me their dad has never told them he loved her.

I would also remind her often that you are there for her, not against her. That we as parents want the best for our kids and we are in their corner in life is a huge deal. This also means that we are still for them even when they mess up. Our kids need to know that we love them “forever and always” no matter what happens. This is unconditional love.

In the last decade, we as a society have been talking about mental health. What can we as parents do if our kid is struggling?

If I am in a room of students and/or parents and ask who knows someone who struggles with mental health, there is usually not a hand that does not go up. It is affecting all of us as a modern culture today. As someone who had a breakdown back in 2012 from speaking close to 300 speaking dates a year to pay for my Master’s degree, I was taking down in Chicago I understand first-hand the … what word do I use … struggle that those of us with mental health struggles face within the church today. One of the issues is that we allow people with cancer, diabetes, and other illnesses to follow a path to healing using best practices (doctors, medications, etc) but tell someone struggling with mental health it must be a spiritual issue. I have an entire talk on this called the Walking Wounded. Let me give you the 2 min summary.

If you or your kids are struggling with mental health you need to attack it in 3 ways:

1. Body – go to your family doctor. Get blood work, and a physical done and see if there is anything physically wrong with you. You then need to take care of your body by eating better, sleeping more, and doing daily exercise. Some of the struggles we have are just from our living unsustainable lives. We need to take back control of what we can.
2. Mind – go see a counselor and get some strategies to help you in your journey.
3. Soul – Now this is the one that gets vast debate. I would say that our faith is (for the most part) not the answer in the journey but is the thing that sustains us in the journey no matter the outcome. Talk to pastors, prayer teams, small groups, and other people and allow them into your journey as well.

How are sexuality, media, and dating related?

I put them all under an umbrella I call a Christian Sexual Ethic or a Biblical worldview of healthy sexuality. If you have a correct ethic or worldview on this, it will affect all aspects of how we view sexuality in our lives. This affects what we do in relationships, what we do online, and the type of media we put into our lives.

Give me some practical examples as to how we can connect an ancient faith to our fast-paced modern culture?

I think it starts with a Biblical Worldview. Your Worldview shapes your values, and then your values shape your actions, what you actually do in life. I have been talking about spiritual disciplines for 15 years in my talks. These are the primary spiritual formation building blocks of our faith. Reading, praying, fasting, giving, volunteering, etc. are the foundations of our faith. I just finished a chapter on this for my new book so here is a shortlist of a few books to get you started in this area:

1. Dallas Willard: The Spirit of the Disciplines: Understanding How God Changes Lives
2. Richard J. Foster: Celebration of Discipline: The Path to Spiritual Growth
3. Nathan Foster: The Making of an Ordinary Saint
4. Patrick M. Morley: A Man’s Guide to the Spiritual Disciplines: 12 Habits to Strengthen Your Walk with Christ
5. Ken Shigematsu: God in My Everything: How an Ancient Rhythm Helps Busy People Enjoy God
6. Gary Thomas: Sacred Pathways
7. Ruth R. Barton: Sacred Rhythms: Arranging our lives for Spiritual Transformation

Give me some practical tips on parenting and how to communicate with our kids on taboo topics?

The author Henry Cloud says we need to “Enter the danger.” We need not shy away from the tough stuff but lean into the conversations.

One thing that is really important here is that if you want to be able to speak to your kids on tough topics, you have to have relational influence in their lives. This is not something that you get because you are a parent, it is something you have to earn. When your kids are born, you have positional influence as you are the parent, and they are the kid. As they get older this fades away, and you must have relational influence. You build this day by day as your kids are growing up by being involved in their lives, family dinners, family vacations, family meetings, talks on the couch, game night, movie night, laughing and crying with your kids, encouraging them, etc.

Back to the tough topics use people around you. If you do not know what to say about a particular topic spend some time searching online, talk to your pastors and leaders, talk to parents of kids who are older than yours, read books on this topic, spend time on YouTube and searching Ted talks for great content. My website (www.brettullman.com) is filled with resources like this. My blog has conversations on all of these tough topics and the best links to other resources are all posted.

Talk to my female audience and help them in the dating world and how they need to navigate it?

I might start with a younger audience and say you don’t need to rush into dating in Grade 5-11. It will add a lot of heartaches, and the real question you are going to have to answer is what do you do sexually in these relationships as there is not much else that will be different from a good friend and dating other than that.

The other side of that coin is said to people who are out of High School and challenging them actually to date. We have a problem I see today where people are just not dating.

An important question to ask is not whether they like you, but whether they are worth you’re like.

Let me explain this better. It is great they like you, but does it matter? Are they the right person for you? Do you also like them? Do you have anything in common etc.? You don’t need to date someone just because they like you. You have a choice whether to like them back (in a dating way) or just stay friends.

What are some questions we need to ask ourselves before getting married?

The most viewed blog on my site with over 12,600 views is 80+ questions you need to ask when you are dating. Lots of questions to ask before you ever get engaged and married. Just a few good ones would be:

–    What behavior is appropriate for those who are going to practice sexual abstinence before marriage

–    Are you a non-practicing Christian? What does the Christian faith mean to you?

–    Do you want any? 1? 2? 5?

–    What kind of home do you want your children to grow up in? Values? Rules?

–    What will you do? Where will you live? What comes with the job you have chosen? Travel?

You can use my blog as a start and then add any other questions you have. The point is to ask these before you get serious. If you want to have kids and they do not this is a massive red flag that your relationship might not be right. If they’re going to move to another place in the country and you want to live near your family and friends, it might be another red flag. 

How important is communication in the family?

It is paramount. I am a huge fan of family dinners, family meetings, family vacations, etc. The problem we see today is peer attachment without parental attachment. This is seen in Leonard Sax’s’ book The Collapse of Parenting. Our kids are looking for unconditional love and acceptance from their peers which is just something they are not able to give. Our kids need a strong, secure attachment (bond) with us as parents, only then can they head out into the world and bond with their peers.

We as parents need to make sure that we work at good communication. No technology at the dinner table. Phones are on airplane mode and not on silent. People need to look at each other in the eye when they are talking. This problem of partial attention is getting worse in life.

We also need to have open communication on the expectations of our kids around the house. Clear, agreed on boundaries and expectations for everything from chores to curfew.

How do you balance faith family finance and food in this busy world?

I think the first thought here is just to be conscious that you want to live a balanced, sustainable life. I am presently reading “The Ripple Effect” by Greg Wells. The bi-line is:

Sleep better

Eat better

Move better

Think better

So love this. Many years ago, I heard the analogy of the jar with the different size rocks. If you put in the sand and small stones first the large rocks will not fit in. But, if you put in the large rocks, then small stones, then the sand they will all fit. It is the same in our lives. Plan your life to fit in the large rocks first (exercise, sleep, diet, faith etc.), then put in the smaller stones (shopping, cleaning, volunteering) When all of these things are done you are left to put in the sand of your life (TV, social media, video games, etc).

The post Reflections on mental health and parenting appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Stuck means you are in a situation that is unfortunate that you cannot get out of. Unstuck is the process and framework of getting out of that unfortunate situation.

The synonyms for stuck include: frozen, jammed, lodged, set, tight, wedged, and snug. There are certain words attached to stuck: bonded, cemented, glued, embedded, entrenched, immovable, and unyielding. You see where I am going.

It is a new year. We do not have to be stuck to old ideas, concepts, ways of doing things, and mindsets. These are literally harming you.

Getting unstuck is the answer. Become intentional and find ways and solutions to barriers that are holding you back.

I talk to Cheryl Patterson who holds a B.A. in Psychology from the University of Waterloo, in addition to an applied background in both counseling and business.

Her passion to help others led her from the daunting anticipation of doing it from a desk to being able to have more freedom and more of an impact as a freelance writer and magazine columnist for more than twenty years. She has inspired thousands of people with her health and well-being articles and columns in national and international magazines and continues to do so in her own publication.

Cheryl also continues to inspire people internationally with her podcast and book.

Cheryl shares her most vulnerable feelings and experiences in this interview.

Cheryl, welcome to FourColumns. I find writing cathartic. What drew you to writing?

Writing has always been a passion for me, originally as a way to express myself as a child, and later to also teach what I learn. I used to carry a book around with me in my 20’s to jot down ideas as I thought of them. I think one of my first ideas that randomly came to mind was about the stepping stones of life, and how our experiences were a step leading us to the next one.

I’ve also always wanted to help people. At first, I thought I wanted to do it through counseling, and got my B.A. in Psychology and counseling diploma. However, I realized that I could have just as much (if not more) impact through writing.

We all get stuck in life. Marriage with no romance or life, dead-end job, cynical family, toxic friends, and emotionally burned. How does your podcast deal with and talk about these issues?

The podcast, Unstuck: Stay Busy or Get Real, deals with all of these issues because they all come from core areas that we can pay attention to and begin to modify in simple ways in order to progress forward.

For instance, our self-worth can impact all of these areas we can get stuck in. If you’re struggling with low self-worth, how do you attract people in your life that will treat you like you deserve to be treated, or strive for the job you really want?

Once you realize some of the areas keeping you stuck, you can begin to make changes to improve them. The podcast provides insight into areas that can impact your personal or professional success and provides suggestions for actions that can help you get unstuck and move forward. This can be general life challenges, or ones that seem to come out of know where, or even periodically, like the holidays – a difficult time for a lot of people.

Do not get me started about the holidays. We create the perfect cards, the perfect ads on TV, the perfect romance, the perfect snowfall. Talk about this pressure and how to deal with it?

Like most stressful experiences, once you realize it’s taking its toll, then you can begin tweaking things to create improvements for the better.

Sometimes we do these holiday things in the guise of happiness, but if it’s not making you happy, take some time to think about why. Make a list of what’s making you happy, and what’s not. Share some of the responsibilities that someone else might not mind doing so that you can do more of what you enjoy. Pay attention to your wants and needs and make sure there’s a balance between this and what you do for others, and focus more on meaning and fulfillment rather than perfection.

For those who are alone or struggling because of loss around this time of year, creating change is your friend. Doing the same things will get you the same results, and feelings… Plan ahead for a different experience. Create new routines and traditions in support of feeling better. For instance, instead of mourning someone, honor them instead. Bake or cook something they used to (or used to like) as a special gesture to them. The ideas are endless. Just make it special and positive to create a new experience moving forward. I’ve been here and this is what helped me.

As I get older, my friends, career, family, and direction are all aligned with my goals and value. I also had to dig deep and see where I get my identity from. I was stuck in certain areas of how I thought. If we do not deal with it we get worried, stressed, ashamed, and feel unwanted. You deal with these issues in the book. Walk me through it?

Put simply, to be happy in life, in any area, we have to be real with ourselves, regarding what needs are being met from all of these areas you mentioned (relationships, career, goals, etc.), and which ones aren’t, and this comes from within.

It can be easy to blame the outside world regarding why things aren’t working, but this just keeps us stuck. It’s important to pay attention to things like how you’re feeling, what’s nagging at you, possible triggers, and possible things about yourself that may be holding you back.

Any struggle you experience is tied to your emotions (your subconscious), which inhibits your progress. We want to stay safe, even without realizing it, and even if it means we’re in pain or struggle because it’s what’s familiar and easy. To get unstuck, and get to where you want to go or to be the person you desire to be, means you have to be honest with yourself.

Do you have hidden shame, feel poorly about yourself (in spite of the brave front you present to the world), engage in the same scenarios over and over? This is all potential learning, letting you know that you have an opportunity for growth that can get you closer to your ideal self and experiences.

The more we learn about ourselves, our struggles and patterns, and why they’re there, the more we can live more in alignment with a happier and more fulfilling life. It opens us up to healthier relationships, achieves our goals, and makes living a more fulfilled life attainable.

The alternative is to keep things the same – to stay in emotional turmoil (i.e. shame, guilt, fear, worry, doubt, feeling poorly about yourself, etc.) – which will result in the same chaotic outcomes, and lead to poor health. You can’t be stressed and healthy simultaneously because your immune system is suppressed and your body is fighting a toxic chemical cocktail in this state.

My book, The Little Black Book For Getting Unstuck, provides some quick, simple, and straightforward ways that you can get unstuck, and live more in alignment with your ideal self and life. And I don’t just tell, I put myself out there too, and get vulnerable, and share some of my own obstacles that I’ve had to overcome in my life since childhood. Not pretty, but necessary.

Many of my readers are stuck. Give them hope for 2022?

I came from an unstable family, with parents that had no idea about how to deal with conflict, other than alcohol, violence, chaos, and breakups. Most of my childhood was spent in and out of foster care. Fortunately, I was one of the fortunate ones because of some of the people I met that helped me feel loved and worthy enough to require more from myself than to become the negative things I saw.

Thankfully, I’ve also always had a mind of my own, and although my past created many obstacles for me to overcome, such as low self-worth (something that took me a lifetime to realize was even an issue), shame, fear, doubt, I pushed through. If I ran into situations I wanted to overcome, I learned about how to improve them, and I still do. I’ve been passionate about putting every lesson, tool, story, or experience into practice to become the person I want to be, living the life I want to live. It hasn’t always been easy for me, but perseverance and learning have been everything. Learning really has been powerful for me because it enables growth and success.

If I could give you one tip for 2022, it would be to carve out 10-15 minutes a day to learn something that will improve your situation. The most impactful learning will be about yourself, and it doesn’t have to be complicated. It can be as simple as learning about a few practices you can add to your day to help you stay accountable for whatever goal you’re striving for, or to help you maintain self-confidence in an area you’re struggling with or ways to feel better. Think about an area that you’re struggling with and start from there. And never give up.

I have a morning ritual that starts with things that keep me feeling peaceful and happy (an open vs. closed state for achieving daily tasks/goals), even on those days, it feels challenging. Meditation, journaling (including gratitude), and learning are three staples that are as important as brushing my teeth. Think about a little ritual you can create for yourself to set the pace for your day, inspire and keep you feeling balanced, and act as a buffer and a preventative for those days you feel off.

The post Getting Unstuck: How To Become Happier appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

What is self-care? Self-care is the intentional and concerned process of taking care of and improving your mental, emotional, physical, financial, and spiritual health with a balanced lifestyle. During this pandemic, it can be stressful and self-care is important. I strongly recommend that you eat well, sleep 8 hrs a day, maintain your social network, exercise, take care of your spiritual needs, have financial security and focus on the end of the tunnel.

Self-care is taking care of yourself and it is very important.

I have gone to the gym and eaten healthily for most of my life. I have taken care of my finances. These are examples of self-care. One area I was neglecting was my emotional self-care. I volunteered as a financial counselor, helped many friends go through a divorce and their own emotional challenges. I neglected boundaries and realized my gifts are not in the area of counseling and giving emotional support. I was burned out and it was impacting my marriage and parenting.

We can embrace busyness because that is the status symbol. We try to be busy so that we can feel important. I have learned to say NO to a lot of volunteer and other positions offered to me. I had to have a holistic approach to life.

The moment we align our goals, values, and ethos with our job, friends, charitable giving, and the various organizations that we are part of, cognitive dissonance disappears. We are happy. We live a purpose-driven life. Everything makes sense.

Over the next couple of weeks, this is what I want you to do. The job you have. Do you love it? Are you passionate about it? Does it work with your core competence and skillsets? The friends you have. Are they toxic? Do you hang out with them because of your own insecurity? Are they taking you to where you want to go in life? What about where you live, where you worship, and other organizations that you are part of?

I am asking you to take an inventory of where you are at. We get so caught up in financial net worth that we forget about our emotional, mental, psychological, spiritual worth? What is your identity?

It is 2022. We are still in the midst of a pandemic. Please stay safe and take care of yourself.

Josie D is the creator behind The Cheetah Buzz, a unique lifestyle blog on fashion, beauty, and travel. I catch up with her and talk about personal style, beauty trends, and self-care.

Josie, I am excited to talk to you about fashion, travel, and beauty. I want to know something about you?

Thank you so much for interviewing little ole’ me. I feel so humbled and blessed for this opportunity! One thing about me is that I was born in Accra, Ghana and I came to the United States when I was 6 ½ years old. I believe it will be about 22 years since I’ve been living in the States. I’m also a big fan of yellow cake and anything sweet!

I like The Cheetah Buzz. How did the name come about?

Thank you so much! During my freshman year of college, while I was chilling in my friend’s dorm room, her roommate busted in and told me I looked like a cheetah when I smiled lol. I thought it was really funny and it just stuck in my head. In 2017, when I started a portfolio of my pictures on Instagram, I named it The Cheetah Buzz and that snowballed over to the name of my blog!

I want to know how does one find our own personal style and not get caught following the crowd?

One thing I always stress is figuring out what colors you like to see yourself in, from there, you can build and figure out what textures and fabrics to gravitate towards. My recent blog post about finding your personal style touches more about this topic. To stand out from the crowd, it’s also important to not follow trends as they come and go, but instead be comfortable in doing your own thing. Let people copy off of your style not you copy of off theirs. Be a trendsetter!

Give women some tips on how they can dress better?

One way to learn how to dress better is to download fashion apps like the Combyne app and the Closet Love app. These apps will help you create and style different outfits so you can see which shirts, jeans, shoes, and accessories pair well together.  Once you do that, then you can implement some of those ideas into your own closet and see what pairs well together there. Another tip is to pick one accessory such as a pair of shoes or a silver necklace and create a look around that one item. You can turn this into a fun challenge!

My daughter is 16. What are some self-care drug store products she must own?

When I was 16, I wish I had the Clean & Clear Day & Night Face Wash 2 Pack to keep the pimples away. This product is both oil-free and hypoallergenic. Also, at this age, I was experimenting with lots of makeup, so the Neutrogena Makeup Remover Cleansing Wipes and the Lypsyl Lip Balm always came in handy. The wipes removed all of my makeup and the lip balm kept my lips super moisturized.

What are the beauty trends for 2021?

I’m not really sure what the beauty trends for 2021 will be as 2020 has been a stay at home look for a lot of people due to the lockdown. But what I’m hoping is less is more and loving the skin you’re in will be the beauty trend for women in 2021. Based on what I see on social media, fashion runways, and in music videos, it looks like lip glosses, defined eyebrows, colorful makeup, bejeweled eyes, and big lashes are staying strong; so maybe they might roll over into 2021.

Self-care, Self-love is not selfish. Please comment?

If something or outside forces are hurting your mental health and overall wellbeing, it’s definitely not selfish to put yourself first and treat yourself back to health. What good are you to others or to society if you don’t take good care of yourself or even love yourself? When you take care of yourself first, then you’ll be more productive in helping others, and that for sure is not selfish.

What does women’s empowerment mean to you and what is it not?

Women’s empowerment is uplifting and fixing another woman’s crown when you see it tilt. This can refer to a lot of things. When you see, hear or read that another woman is going through some hard times or is feeling weak, reach out and lend an ear to them and let her know that you got her back and you are there to listen.

Woman empowerment is speaking out on issues that are hurting or will cause a problem for other women in the community. Woman empowerment does not mean bringing other women down so you can make yourself feel better. It’s also not being envious of other woman’s achievements or successes just because you are not successful yourself. I like to be in the mindset of when one woman is successful at something, we (women as a whole) are all successful too.

Talk to me a little bit about Ghana. I want to know about its vibrant culture and food scene?

Ghana is a beautiful country. I recently traveled to my hometown of Accra, Ghana back in 2018. My sister and I stayed in a local city called Agbogba. The streets were filled with tons of cars, buses, taxis, and lots of vendors trying to sell people things. There were tons of palm trees nearby and the sand was like a beautiful dark, orange-brown color. The houses were big and beautifully made with their own personalities. People were always smiling and happy about life. It’s definitely a great place to retire lol.

The locals spoke a lot of different languages including Ga, Twi, Ewe, and English of course. I believe the food was the best part of Ghana. You had a wide variety of savory foods to choose from like fufu with palm nut stew, banku with okra stew and crab, jollof rice with lots of goat meat, and kenkey with shito and fried fish, among many others.

I was never a people pleaser. I sleep better. You talk a lot about how people-pleasing can be destructive. Walk me through how it can be harmful?

Lol lucky you! Yes, I have always been a people pleaser since I was little. I think it was just embedded in me to be that way as a child. I was always taught to follow orders and help people out whether I wanted to or not. If I didn’t and told someone no, the guilt I would feel almost made doing the thing for that person better than the feeling of telling them no.

As a people pleaser, it hurt my personal self-care because I always put others’ needs before my own which made me rely upon and put my trust in people. And then when people would disappoint me, the hurt cut through me more than anything — and that is the destructive part about it. Now as a recovering people pleaser, I know I cannot put my trust in others anymore and I cannot be afraid to say no especially if hinders my mental health or overall wellbeing.

I love the fact that you talk about positive affirmation. Share a little about that?

Positive affirmations are so powerful! When you recite positive affirmations, the words can shift your perspective on how you see yourself. Though your circumstances or surroundings may be poor, if you tell yourself I am rich every day, you will start to believe that and that can manifest into you finding ways to become rich or make you look at different parts of your life in a positive way and know that you are rich in other ways: you are rich in health, rich in life, and rich because you have a family that loves you and so forth. Positive affirmations can make a world of difference.

The post Self Care: Taking Care of Yourself appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Money touches everything. It affects how we sleep, how we eat, how we raise our children, and how we dream about the future. Yet too often, we treat finances like a separate compartment of life, disconnected from faith, family, and well-being.

What if we approached money the way we approach health, looking at the whole picture instead of isolated parts?

In this conversation, Jason Trueman, Portfolio Manager with Cumberland Private Wealth Management, shares why a holistic approach to household finances matters. From buying a quality mattress to investing with discipline, Jason explains how thoughtful spending, long-term vision, and balance can create not just wealth, but freedom and peace of mind.

Welcome to Four Columns, where food, faith, finance, and family are not separate conversations, but part of the same story.

Jason, welcome to Four Columns, a holistic blog on food, faith, finance, and family. Please tell me a little about yourself.

I am a Portfolio Manager with Cumberland Private Wealth Manager. Cumberland is headquartered in Toronto. I work with a talented team in Kingston, Ontario, including a CFP, CA, CPA, and TEP, providing holistic wealth management services for successful Canadian families and business owners.

How did you end up in personal finance?

I graduated from Queen’s University with a Bachelor of Commerce Degree. I received my CFA charter in 2001. I started my career as an Underwriter with Chubb Insurance. I was recruited by AIG and worked in Bermuda for 7 years before returning to Kingston to raise our young family in 2010.

Give me three tips on how to have a holistic approach to personal finance?

Control your spending by buying things you need and on an average cost basis (i.e. you will spend one-third of your life on a mattress so buy a good one).

Be disciplined with your investing. Buy dominant companies with great management who care about both their customers and their shareholders (these are rare and require work to find).

There is a balance between disciplined spending and enjoying your life; life is short so if you need a trip or a new car or new shoes to enjoy your life then spend the money.

What happens when we live on credit cards and not on our salary?

Credit cards that you pay off in full on a monthly basis and never pay interest on and accumulate rewards are great. When you overspend and pay exorbitant interest living beyond your means then you will suffer from difficult financial decisions and increasing stress.

How important is it to have a budget as part of a holistic approach to our personal finance?

I find long-term goals are helpful in providing meaning to your actions like why am I going to work and saving for my child’s education or retirement. Budgets help keep your life and spending in order; like a calendar and daily to-do lists.

What are some important tips to start saving?

Paying off your higher interest-bearing debt is most important. Taking advantage of government savings programs like RESPs, RRSPs and TFSAs is enormously important as well. Again, buying things you need (healthy food, a quality mattress) instead of buying things you want for status and cost a lot on a per-use basis (the tenth pair of shoes, vacation properties) is critically important.

How do you balance faith, food, finance, and family?

I believe in humanity; if we all do our part to contribute, we collectively accomplish amazing things. If you don’t spend money on healthy food then you’ll pay the price with poor health and physical limitations. Finance is about independence; ideally, a career doing something you enjoy while creating financial freedom to do nothing if you so choose. Raising kind, caring and confident children who find something productive they love to do in life are our number one job as parents.

Can you recommend some great restaurants in Kingston?

Kingston has an enormous array of awesome restaurants – having 35,000 students in the city helps. I prefer local family-owned restaurants such as Tango, Woodenheads, and Harpers.

You manage money for the wealthy, what have you learned from the experience? Do they have a holistic approach?

Success usually requires some form of sacrifice at some stage in their life. For many that mean focusing on academic excellence instead of always finding the nearest party. For others, that means pursuing an idea, a vision, and taking on considerable financial risk, and working excessive hours to make their dream a reality.

How important is food to you?

Food has an enormous impact on how you feel and how you look. Humanity would benefit from healthier eating with lower health care costs, lower greenhouse gas emissions, and an overall more productive society and cleaner earth.

The post Holistic Approach to Household Finances appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Nirmala Srivastava founded Sahaja Yoga in 1970. During meditation, seekers experience self-realization. Sahaja is a Sanskrit term consisting of ‘Saha’ is ‘with’ and ‘ja’ is ‘born’. In the Buddhist dictionary, it is ‘innate, denoting the natural presence of enlightenment or purity’.

Dr. Girish Gupta, a management consultant, and practitioner of Sahaja Yoga Meditation talks about its advantages.

Girish, it is a pleasure to have you here. Please tell my global audience a little about you?

I am a management consultant, advising companies on the best ways to manage and operate their business, which includes business strategy, operational techniques, marketing, branding, and skills like time management. I help companies become efficient, increase synergies and increase their footprint by attracting new business.

What did you do for your Ph.D. thesis?

I did my Ph.D. in Marketing Management.  The thesis was – Study on the Industrial Product Marketing Strategy of selected companies in India.

Explain your yoga style and how it is linked to your faith.

I practice Sahaja Yoga Meditation. It is Self-Realization or Actualization. Sahaja Yoga is given by our Divine Mother, Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi who is the founder of Sahaja Yoga. It is practiced in more than 180 countries across the world. For more details, one can visit www.sahajayoga.org. As far as faith, you can see various miracles in your day-to-day life. You also have peace from within.

Is there any special God you worship?

After practicing Sahaja Yoga, you get the knowledge that all Gods are one and equal. They all lead you to take only one path. The path is the truth that one can feel in his/her nervous system.

How do you embrace good and shun evil?

As we practice Sahaja Yoga and get better, we get established in it. At that point, one automatically comes to know through vibration what is evil and good. You act accordingly.

Do you follow any specific diet?

No, I do not follow any specific diet. However, I surely try to follow a disciplined routine. I take Breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.  I make sure there is no interval of more than 4 or 5 hours after each meal. For me, a meal can also be having fruit.

What are the advantages of doing yoga?

People perceive yoga as only physical activity, but actually, yoga means one’s Reunion with all-pervading power which is God’s love flowing everywhere. This reunion can be achieved by self-realization meditation only. I also recommend physical exercise like walking, jogging, cycling, going to the gym, and swimming.

Tell me about Indore and some good restaurants and your favorite dishes.

Indore is located in the western part of Madhya Pradesh. It is a developing B-class city in India. Indore was awarded as best city for cleanliness two years in a row.

Indore is famous for food-loving people with a variety of tastes, different food outlets, and restaurants for their sumptuous meals.  Indore has a food market (Also known as khau gali) that operates from 8 PM to 12 PM. You get a variety of food from Chinese, South Indian, pasta, Jalebi, Kachori, Samosa, etc.

I do not have any specific favorite dish. However, I like Kadhi (made from curd), and butter paneer masala and am fond of sweets. Shreemaya, Sayaji, and TGB are some good restaurants in Indore.

Give me some tips on being a good husband and I will follow up with your wife to see if you are doing these things.

I would strongly recommend trusting each other blindly. Keep quiet when the other person is angry (don’t argue at that point in time). Once when things are normal and cooled down explain your point of view. Love each other without any expectations.

How do you balance faith, food, finance, family, and your career?

Don’t take your office worries home and vice versa. After practicing Sahaja Yoga meditation, you get a work-life balance easily.

The post Sahaja Yoga Meditation appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.