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	<title>#peace Archives - Four Columns of a Balanced Life</title>
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	<title>#peace Archives - Four Columns of a Balanced Life</title>
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		<title>Finding Peace in a Chaotic World</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/finding-peace-in-a-chaotic-world/</link>
					<comments>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/finding-peace-in-a-chaotic-world/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Mar 2025 18:20:47 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#meditation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/?p=29286</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Finding peace in a chaotic world of 24/7, hustle culture, always on the treadmill, political instability, and destination syndrome can be challenging. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, compassion, gentleness, humility, authenticity, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach. These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/finding-peace-in-a-chaotic-world/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/finding-peace-in-a-chaotic-world/">Finding Peace in a Chaotic World</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Finding peace in a chaotic world of 24/7, hustle culture, always on the treadmill, political instability, and destination syndrome can be challenging.</p>
<p><a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/empowered-unconditional-love/">Love</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/">joy</a>, peace, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-patience/">patience</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/">kindness</a>, goodness, faithfulness, compassion, gentleness, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/humility/">humility</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/authenticity/">authenticity</a>, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach.</p>
<p>These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to interpersonal relationships and society. They foster environments where understanding, cooperation, and harmony are more likely to flourish. Cultivating these traits can lead to a more peaceful and productive coexistence, and indeed, there are no laws against such virtues because they universally promote social good. They transcend cultural and legal boundaries, highlighting a shared human aspiration towards a kinder and more compassionate society.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>What is Peace</strong></h4>
<p data-start="0" data-end="180">Peace is a state of harmony, calmness, and the absence of conflict—both externally in the world and internally within oneself. Finding peace in a chaotic world can mean different things in various contexts:</p>
<p><strong data-start="185" data-end="203">Personal Peace</strong> – A sense of inner tranquility, contentment, and freedom from stress or anxiety by creating <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/healthy-anger-boundaries-eating/">boundaries</a>.</p>
<p><strong data-start="290" data-end="306">Social Peace</strong> – The absence of conflict or violence in relationships, communities, or societies.</p>
<p><strong data-start="395" data-end="411">Global Peace</strong> – The absence of war and conflict between nations, promoting cooperation, justice, and mutual respect.</p>
<p><strong data-start="520" data-end="539">Spiritual Peace</strong> – A deep sense of fulfillment, connection, and alignment with one&#8217;s beliefs or purpose.</p>
<p data-start="631" data-end="788" data-is-last-node="" data-is-only-node="">Finding peace in a chaotic world comes from understanding, acceptance, and the ability to navigate challenges with wisdom rather than hostility. Consider how wisdom can help us find peace in a chaotic world. I have listed a lot of soul-searching questions. If you want to find peace answer them truthfully.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;" data-start="631" data-end="788"><strong data-start="244" data-end="278">Personal Peace</strong></h4>
<p>Personal peace is an inner state of calm, balance, and contentment, regardless of external circumstances. It means being free from excessive stress, fear, or internal conflict and feeling emotionally, mentally, and spiritually grounded.</p>
<p><strong data-start="284" data-end="303">Self-Acceptance</strong> – Have you accepted yourself including your strengths and flaws? Are you always comparing yourself to others? Are you always looking at social media and realizing your life does not match those of influencers? Are you leading an <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/authenticity/">authentic</a> life?</p>
<p><strong data-start="379" data-end="402">Emotional Stability</strong> – What would your friends, family, and co-workers say regarding your emotions? Are you emotionally intelligent? Is anger, bitterness, resentment, or anxiety controlling your emotions?</p>
<p><strong data-start="492" data-end="518">Mindfulness </strong><span style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><strong>and Presence:</strong> Are you living in the <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/yoga-meditation-and-mindfulness-benefits/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">moment</a> and <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/attitude-of-gratitude/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">grateful,</a> or are you focusing on the past and worrying</span> about the future?</p>
<p><strong data-start="593" data-end="608">Forgiveness</strong> – <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/to-err-is-human-to-forgive-divine/">Forgiveness</a> has to be a key part of achieving peace. Letting go of grudges and resentments lightens your emotional burden.</p>
<p><strong data-start="687" data-end="708">Purpose &amp; Meaning</strong> – <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/define-your-why/">Define your why</a>. Align everything you do with your values and purpose in life.</p>
<p><strong data-start="770" data-end="792">Healthy Boundaries</strong> – Protect yourself and your mental and emotional well-being from negativity and toxic influences.</p>
<p data-start="884" data-end="1056" data-is-last-node="" data-is-only-node="">Finding peace in a chaotic world does not mean avoiding challenges but rather handling them with clarity and <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/resilience-stress-management/">resilience</a>. It’s a journey, not a destination.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;" data-start="884" data-end="1056"><strong>Social Peace</strong></h4>
<p>Finding social peace in chaotic times requires continuous effort from individuals, communities, and governments. It starts with personal peace but extends to how we interact with others. I am going to focus on the effort of the individual.</p>
<p><strong data-start="362" data-end="385">Respect &amp; Tolerance</strong> – Do you respect and tolerate those who think and act differently from you? Do you treat them with dignity? Do your social media posts reflect <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/empowered-unconditional-love/">love</a>, grace, and mercy?</p>
<p><strong data-start="449" data-end="471">Justice &amp; Fairness</strong> – Do your actions reflect and ensure equality, human rights, and social justice for all? Are you honest and transparent even if it is inconvenient? Are you treating everyone equally irrespective of race, gender, religion, or social status?</p>
<p><strong data-start="540" data-end="563">Conflict Resolution</strong> – Deal with disputes through dialogue, negotiation, or mediation instead of violence. Come with an open mind. Listen to understand rather than speak. Find common ground for understanding. Define the problem, look at options, and see if a compromise is possible. The most important factor is that you have to be patient and practice empathy and self-control.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Global Peace</strong></h4>
<p data-start="0" data-end="307">Global peace is a state of harmony among nations and people in which conflicts are resolved through diplomacy and cooperation rather than violence or war.</p>
<p data-start="0" data-end="307">As individuals, we do have a role to play by voting. We need to protect freedom, equality, and dignity for all people and focus on respecting diverse beliefs, traditions, and ways of life.</p>
<p data-start="1062" data-end="1258">Global peace is not just the absence of war; it is the presence of justice, opportunity, and mutual respect.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;" data-start="235" data-end="276"><strong data-start="239" data-end="274">Spiritual Peace</strong></h4>
<p><strong data-start="0" data-end="19">Spiritual peace</strong> is a deep sense of inner harmony, fulfillment, and connection with something greater than oneself. It goes beyond external circumstances and is rooted in faith, purpose, and a sense of belonging in the universe.</p>
<p><strong data-start="280" data-end="308">Inner Calm &amp; Tranquility</strong> – Are you at peace regardless of life&#8217;s challenges?  Peace does not mean the absence of struggles but having God’s presence in the midst of them. <em data-start="2084" data-end="2103">Philippians 4:6-7</em> – Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.</p>
<p><strong data-start="366" data-end="400">Connection with a Higher Power</strong> – Do you find strength and guidance through faith or spirituality? <em data-start="239" data-end="247">Shalom</em> is more than just the absence of conflict; it represents completeness, wholeness, and harmony. The Talmud says that peace is so important that even truth can be set aside to preserve it (<em data-start="797" data-end="806">Yevamot</em> 65b).</p>
<p><strong data-start="469" data-end="490">Purpose &amp; Meaning</strong> – Do you know your role in life and feel aligned with a greater purpose? The Upanishads suggest that true peace is achieved when individuals align themselves with the universal order (<em data-start="951" data-end="956">Rta</em>).</p>
<p><strong data-start="575" data-end="602">Gratitude &amp; Contentment</strong> – Are you appreciating life and finding joy in the present moment? Gratitude transcends cultures, religions, and philosophies, making it a universal spiritual quality.</p>
<p><strong data-start="757" data-end="778">Compassion &amp; Love</strong> – Are you embracing kindness and seeing others with understanding and empathy? Islam recognizes diversity and encourages peaceful coexistence: <em data-start="1871" data-end="1993">&#8220;O mankind, We have created you from a male and a female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another.&#8221;</em> (Quran 49:13).</p>
<p data-start="853" data-end="1053">Peace is essential for a society to thrive because it fosters stability, prosperity, and overall well-being.</p>
<p data-start="853" data-end="1053"><img fetchpriority="high" decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-29321" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-1-683x1024.png" alt="" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-1-768x1152.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Untitled-Design-1.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
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		<title>Compassion: A universal law</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/compassion/</link>
					<comments>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/compassion/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 Aug 2024 13:25:01 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#compassion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#hope]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#wisdom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[patience]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/?p=28751</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Compassion is a deep and complex human emotion, a trait that is instinctual and cultivated and plays a pivotal role in the social fabric of our lives.  It is more than just empathy or sympathy. It is a deep awareness of the suffering of another,&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/compassion/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/compassion/">Compassion: A universal law</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/Untitled-Design-2.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><div class="sticky top-0 juice:p-3 mb-1.5 flex items-center justify-between z-10 h-14 p-2 font-semibold bg-token-main-surface-primary">
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<p class="gizmo-bot-avatar flex h-6 w-6 items-center justify-center overflow-hidden rounded-full juice:h-8 juice:w-8">Compassion is a deep and complex human emotion, a trait that is instinctual and cultivated and plays a pivotal role in the social fabric of our lives.  It is more than just empathy or sympathy. It is a deep awareness of the suffering of another, coupled with the desire to alleviate that suffering. This powerful sentiment transcends cultural, religious, and societal boundaries, fundamental to human connection and moral integrity.</p>
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<p><a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/empowered-unconditional-love/">Love</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/">joy</a>, peace, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-patience/">patience</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/">kindness</a>, goodness, faithfulness, compassion, gentleness, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/humility/">humility</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/authenticity/">authenticity</a>, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach.</p>
<p>These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to interpersonal relationships and society. They foster environments where understanding, cooperation, and harmony are more likely to flourish. Cultivating these traits can lead to a more peaceful and productive coexistence, and indeed, there are no laws against such virtues because they universally promote social good. They transcend cultural and legal boundaries, highlighting a shared human aspiration towards a kinder and more compassionate society.</p>
<p>Over the next few weeks, I will focus on these universal qualities and see how they can empower us to be better human beings.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Quotes</strong></h4>
<p>More smiling, less worrying. More compassion, less judgment. More blessed, less stressed. More love, less hate. ― <span class="authorOrTitle">Roy T. Bennett</span></p>
<p>Compassion is the basis of morality. ― <span class="authorOrTitle">Arthur Schopenhauer</span></p>
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<p>Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive. ― <span class="authorOrTitle">Dalai Lama XIV</span></p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>What is Compassion</strong></h4>
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<p>Compassion involves recognizing the pain or difficulty that another person is experiencing and feeling a genuine concern for their well-being. This emotional response often motivates people to take action to help others, whether through small acts of kindness or larger efforts to address systemic issues. It is rooted in humility and the understanding that suffering is a universal human experience.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Compassion in Action to Empower</strong></h4>
<p>Compassion manifests in many ways, from small, everyday gestures to grand humanitarian efforts. You can show it by listening to a friend, offering comforting words, or helping. These small acts, while seemingly insignificant, can profoundly impact the recipient, providing your friend the support and reassurance they need to get through difficult times.</p>
<p>On a larger scale, compassion drives people to engage in charitable work, volunteerism, and advocacy for social justice. It motivates individuals and organizations to address poverty, inequality, and human rights abuses.</p>
<p>Recent studies in neuroscience and psychology have shown that it is not just a social or moral construct but has deep biological roots. The brain’s response to compassion involves areas that are also activated when we experience pleasure or receive rewards, suggesting that acts of compassion are intrinsically rewarding.</p>
<p>Moreover, research has indicated that it can improve mental and physical health. Individuals who regularly engage in compassionate behavior tend to experience lower levels of stress, reduced symptoms of depression, and greater overall well-being.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Self-Care</strong></h4>
<p>An important but often overlooked aspect of compassion is self-compassion, the ability to be kind and understanding toward oneself during times of failure or suffering. Many people find it easier to extend it to others than to themselves, but self-compassion is crucial for overall well-being. It involves recognizing that imperfection and difficulty are part of the human experience and treating oneself with the same care and concern that one would offer to a friend.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Compassion in a Global Context</strong></h4>
<p>In a world increasingly interconnected by technology and global issues, compassion has never been more important. The challenges we face—such as climate change, pandemics, and social inequality—require collective action and a compassionate response that transcends borders. Global compassion involves recognizing the shared struggles of people across the world and taking action to support those who are most vulnerable.</p>
<p>To combat compassion fatigue, it is essential to focus on the positive impact that compassionate actions can have, no matter how small. It is also important to practice self-care and seek support from others when the emotional burden becomes too great. By maintaining a balance between awareness and action, individuals can continue to contribute to a more compassionate world without becoming overwhelmed.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>The Role of Compassion in Relationships</strong></h4>
<p>Compassion plays a crucial role in building and maintaining healthy relationships. Whether in friendships, family dynamics, or romantic partnerships, compassion fosters understanding, trust, and mutual support. When people approach their relationships with others, they are more likely to listen empathetically, forgive mistakes, and offer help when needed.</p>
<p>In conflicts, compassion can serve as a bridge to reconciliation. By taking the time to understand the other person’s perspective and responding with kindness rather than anger, conflicts can be resolved more peacefully and constructively.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>The Challenges of Compassion</strong></h4>
<p>Despite its many benefits, compassion is not always easy to practice. It can be difficult to maintain in the face of personal stress, burnout, or when dealing with individuals who may be challenging or harmful.</p>
<p>One of the challenges is finding the balance between caring for others and caring for oneself. Overextending oneself in the service of others can lead to burnout and resentment, which can undermine the very compassion one is trying to cultivate. It is important to set boundaries and recognize one’s limits, ensuring that compassionate actions are sustainable and do not come at the cost of one’s well-being.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>How to cultivate it</strong></h4>
<p>Cultivating compassion requires both intention and practice. It involves developing an awareness of others&#8217; experiences, practicing empathy, and taking action to alleviate suffering. This process can be supported by various practices, such as mindfulness, meditation, and engaging in acts of kindness.</p>
<p>Mindfulness involves being present in the moment and aware of one&#8217;s thoughts, feelings, and surroundings. By practicing mindfulness, individuals can become more attuned to the experiences of others and more aware of opportunities to practice compassion. Meditation practices, such as loving-kindness meditation, can also help cultivate a compassionate mindset by encouraging individuals to focus on the well-being of others.</p>
<p>Engaging in regular acts of kindness, whether big or small, can also help build compassion. These acts can be as simple as offering a smile to a stranger, helping a neighbor with groceries, or volunteering at a local charity. By making compassion a regular part of one’s life, it becomes a natural and instinctive response to the world around us.</p>
<p>Compassion is a fundamental human trait that connects us with others and drives us to act for the greater good. It is a powerful force for personal fulfillment, social harmony, and global change. While practicing it can be challenging at times, it is also deeply rewarding and essential for a thriving society. By cultivating compassion in ourselves and encouraging it in others, we can create a more caring, just, and connected world.</p>
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		<title>Act of Kindness</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/</link>
					<comments>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 27 Jun 2024 19:06:57 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#bekind]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#compassion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#kindnessmatters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#positivity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/?p=28572</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>An act of kindness is any selfless action performed to benefit another person without expecting anything in return. Soul Soup in Toms River, New Jersey, offers free meals to those in need every Monday. Community Fridges, stocked by volunteers, have been popping up in cities&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/">Act of Kindness</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><div class="sticky top-0 juice:p-3 mb-1.5 flex items-center justify-between z-10 h-14 p-2 font-semibold bg-token-main-surface-primary">
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<p class="relative p-1 rounded-sm flex items-center justify-center bg-token-main-surface-primary text-token-text-primary h-8 w-8">An act of kindness is any selfless action performed to benefit another person without expecting anything in return. <em>Soul Soup</em> in Toms River, New Jersey, offers free meals to those in need every Monday. <em>Community Fridges</em>, stocked by volunteers, have been popping up in cities to provide free food to those in need. <em>Habitat for Humanity</em> brings together volunteers to build affordable housing for those in need. <em>Pencils of Promise</em> ensures children have access to quality education to help break the cycle of poverty.</p>
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<p>An act of kindness whether big or small, can have a profound impact on individuals and communities around the world.</p>
<p><a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/empowered-unconditional-love/">Love</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/">joy</a>, peace, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-patience/">patience</a>, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/compassion/">compassion</a>, gentleness, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/humility/">humility</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/authenticity/">authenticity</a>, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach.</p>
<p>These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to interpersonal relationships and society. They foster environments where understanding, cooperation, and harmony are more likely to flourish. Cultivating these traits can lead to a more peaceful and productive coexistence, and indeed, there are no laws against such virtues because they universally promote social good. They transcend cultural and legal boundaries, highlighting a shared human aspiration towards a kinder and more compassionate society.</p>
<p>Over the next few weeks, I will focus on these universal qualities and see how they can empower us to be better human beings.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Quotes on Kindness</strong></h4>
<p>Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around &#8211; Leo Buscalgia</p>
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<p>Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate &#8211; Albert Schweitzer</p>
<p>Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you &#8211; Princess Diana</p>
<p>A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees &#8211; Amelia Earhart</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>What is Kindness</strong></h4>
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<p>Kindness is a quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate. It involves actions or behaviors meant to benefit others, often without expecting anything in return.  An act of kindness includes compassion, empathy, altruism, respect, patience, understanding, support, encouragement, forgiveness, and generosity.</p>
<p>An act of kindness is often seen as a fundamental aspect of human interaction that can foster strong relationships, build communities, and improve the overall well-being of individuals and society.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-28628" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-1-1-683x1024.png" alt="" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-1-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-1-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-1-1-768x1152.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-1-1.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>The benefits of performing an act of kindness</strong></h4>
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<p class="flex">When you do an act of kindness, you boost your mood, reduce stress, and enhance your overall sense of happiness. Kindness triggers the release of feel-good hormones like serotonin and endorphins. An act of kindness can increase your self-esteem and confidence, as you feel a sense of purpose and contribution. Try it. Go out there and do an act of kindness.</p>
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<p>Kindness fosters trust and strengthens relationships. It helps build deeper connections with family, friends, and colleagues.  Kindness often inspires others to be kind, creating a cycle of positive behavior that benefits everyone involved. If you want to be a game changer at work, in your neighborhood, and practice kindness.</p>
<p>Kindness helps build strong, supportive communities where people look out for one another and reduce bullying, discrimination, and other negative behaviors. Kindness acknowledges each individual&#8217;s shared humanity and inherent worth, reinforcing the moral principle of treating others as you would like to be treated.</p>
<p>Many philosophies and religions emphasize the moral duty to be kind, viewing it as a fundamental aspect of ethical living.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>How an act of kindness impacts the individual and the community</strong></h4>
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<p class="items-center justify-start rounded-xl p-1 z-10 -mt-1 bg-token-main-surface-primary md:absolute md:border md:border-token-border-light md:hidden">Acts of kindness can provide emotional support, making people feel valued, loved, and less alone. This can be particularly impactful during times of stress or hardship.</p>
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<p>An act of kindness like volunteering at local shelters, food banks, or community centers fosters trust and cooperation within a community. It builds stronger, more connected relationships among community members. If you help a neighbor with groceries, shovel their walkway, or offer a ride, strengthen neighborhood bonds. This positivity can encourage more residents to engage and participate in community activities.</p>
<p>I strongly recommend shopping locally and supporting small businesses to help sustain the local economy and create a more vibrant community. Initiating or participating in community programs that provide safe spaces for marginalized groups promotes inclusivity and respect.</p>
<p>In summary, kindness benefits the individuals directly involved and enhances the overall quality of life within the community. It promotes a culture of empathy, cooperation, and mutual support, leading to a more harmonious and thriving society.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Kindness and Spiritual Traditions</strong></h4>
<p>Kindness and spirituality are deeply interconnected, as many spiritual traditions and philosophies emphasize the importance of compassion, empathy, and love for others.</p>
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<p>Many spiritual paths teach that kindness is a universal principle that transcends cultural and religious boundaries. It&#8217;s seen as a fundamental aspect of human goodness and morality. Spirituality often emphasizes the development of compassion and empathy. By understanding and sharing the feelings of others, individuals are inspired to act kindly. Many spiritual beliefs highlight the interconnectedness of all life. Kindness is a natural outcome of recognizing that we are all part of a larger whole and that our actions affect others.</p>
<p><strong>Christianity:</strong> Jesus taught love and kindness, famously stating, &#8220;Love your neighbor as yourself&#8221; (Mark 12:31). Acts of kindness are seen as expressions of one&#8217;s faith and love for God and humanity.</p>
<p><strong>Buddhism:</strong> The concept of &#8220;metta&#8221; (loving-kindness) is central to Buddhist practice. It involves developing unconditional love and compassion for all beings.</p>
<p><strong>Islam:</strong> Kindness is a significant virtue in Islam. The Prophet Muhammad said, &#8220;Kindness is a mark of faith, and whoever is not kind has no faith.&#8221;</p>
<p><strong>Hinduism:</strong> Hindu teachings emphasize &#8220;ahimsa&#8221; (non-violence) and compassion for all living beings. Kindness is seen as a duty and a path to spiritual growth.</p>
<p><strong>Judaism:</strong> The Jewish tradition values &#8220;chesed&#8221; (loving-kindness) and encourages charity, hospitality, and compassion towards others.</p>
<p>An act of kindness aligns with many spiritual teachings, leading to a sense of inner peace and harmony. It reduces inner conflict and fosters a calm, centered mind. It cultivates spiritual growth. It helps individuals develop virtues such as patience, humility, and generosity.</p>
<p>In conclusion, kindness is a cornerstone of many spiritual traditions and practices. It fosters spiritual growth, inner peace, and a sense of connection to others and the divine.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-28629" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-1-683x1024.png" alt="" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-1-768x1152.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Untitled-Design-2-1.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
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<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>The Biblical Perspective on Kindness</strong></h4>
<p>The Bible places a significant emphasis on kindness, presenting it as a core value and virtue that believers are encouraged to embody.</p>
<p><strong>Matthew 22:37-40:</strong> Jesus states that the greatest commandments are to love God and love your neighbor as yourself. This love is often expressed through acts of kindness and compassion.</p>
<p><strong>Luke 10:25-37:</strong> This parable teaches the importance of showing kindness to others, regardless of their background or circumstances. The Samaritan helps a man in need, illustrating that true neighborly love involves acts of mercy and compassion.</p>
<p><strong>Galatians 5:22-23:</strong> Kindness is listed as one of the fruits of the Spirit, indicating that it is a characteristic that should naturally develop in those who live by the Spirit.</p>
<p><strong>Matthew 7:12:</strong> Jesus teaches, &#8220;So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.&#8221; Treating others with kindness and respect is central to Christian ethics.</p>
<p><strong>Colossians 3:12:</strong> Believers are instructed to &#8220;clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.&#8221; This metaphor emphasizes that kindness should be an integral part of a Christian&#8217;s character.</p>
<p><strong>1 Corinthians 13:4:</strong> In the famous passage about love, Paul writes, &#8220;Love is patient, love is kind.&#8221; This underscores that kindness is a fundamental aspect of true, selfless love.</p>
<p>As a Christian, your faith needs to have practical implications. Believers are encouraged to be generous and charitable, helping those in need. This reflects God&#8217;s kindness towards humanity. Kindness includes forgiving others, just as God has forgiven us. This is highlighted in the Lord&#8217;s Prayer and various teachings of Jesus. Christians are called to encourage and support one another, building each other up in love and kindness. Showing hospitality, especially to strangers, is a form of kindness that is repeatedly emphasized in the New Testament.</p>
<p>Kindness is a central theme in the Bible, woven throughout its teachings and exemplified in the lives of its characters. It is portrayed as an essential aspect of living a life that is pleasing to God and reflective of His love. By practicing kindness, believers not only obey God&#8217;s commands but also serve as witnesses to His grace and compassion in the world.</p>
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		<title>What is Patience</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-patience/</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 23 May 2024 14:14:25 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#kind]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[patience]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, compassion, gentleness, humility, authenticity, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach. These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to interpersonal relationships and society. They foster environments where understanding, cooperation, and harmony are more likely to flourish. Cultivating these&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-patience/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-patience/">What is Patience</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-1.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p><a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/empowered-unconditional-love/">Love</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/">joy</a>, peace, patience, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/">kindness</a>, goodness, faithfulness,<a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/compassion/"> compassion</a>, gentleness, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/humility/">humility</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/authenticity/">authenticity</a>, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach.</p>
<p>These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to interpersonal relationships and society. They foster environments where understanding, cooperation, and harmony are more likely to flourish. Cultivating these traits can lead to a more peaceful and productive coexistence, and indeed, there are no laws against such virtues because they universally promote social good. They transcend cultural and legal boundaries, highlighting a shared human aspiration towards a kinder and more compassionate society.</p>
<p>Over the next few weeks, I will focus on these universal qualities and see how they can empower us to be better human beings.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>QUOTES ABOUT PATIENCE</strong></h4>
<p>Patience is not simply the ability to wait &#8211; it&#8217;s how we behave while we&#8217;re waiting.  &#8211; <em>Joyce Meyer</em></p>
<p>A man who is a master of patience is a master of everything else. &#8211; <em>George Savile</em></p>
<p>Good character is not formed in a week or a month. It is created little by little, day by day. Protracted and patient effort is needed to develop good character. &#8211; <em>Heraclitus</em></p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>WHAT IS PATIENCE</strong></h4>
<p>Patience is the ability to endure difficult circumstances, delay gratification, or tolerate inconvenience without becoming annoyed or upset. It involves self-control, perseverance, and the capacity to remain calm and composed, even in the face of frustration, adversity, or prolonged waiting. Patience is a virtue in many cultures and is often associated with wisdom, maturity, and emotional intelligence. It allows individuals to make thoughtful decisions, maintain harmonious relationships, and achieve long-term goals despite short-term challenges.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-28521" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-3-1-683x1024.png" alt="" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-3-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-3-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-3-1-768x1152.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-3-1.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>WHY IS PATIENCE AN IMPORTANT QUALITY TO HAVE</strong></h4>
<p>Patience is an essential virtue that impacts various aspects of our lives positively.  It allows us to take the time needed to gather all relevant information and consider possible outcomes before making decisions. This leads to better choices and reduces the likelihood of mistakes driven by haste.</p>
<p>In personal and professional relationships, patience helps us to listen attentively and respond more thoughtfully. It fosters understanding, reduces conflict, and builds stronger, more empathetic connections with others.</p>
<p>Practicing patience can reduce stress and anxiety. It helps manage frustrations and anger, leading to a calmer and more balanced state of mind. This contributes to overall emotional well-being.</p>
<p>Achieving long-term goals requires perseverance, and patience is a critical component of this. It helps us stay committed to our objectives despite obstacles and delays, leading to greater success and personal satisfaction.</p>
<p>Patience is crucial in learning new skills or acquiring knowledge. It encourages us to take the time to practice, make mistakes, and gradually improve. This leads to a deeper and more thorough understanding of the subject matter.</p>
<p>When faced with challenges, patience allows us to think through problems methodically and develop more effective solutions. It prevents the rash decisions that often come from impatience.</p>
<p>Patience encourages self-discipline and resilience. It helps to accept that not everything will happen according to our timetable and that some things are beyond our control. This acceptance leads to personal growth and maturity.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>WHERE DOES PATIENCE IMPACT THE COMMUNITY AROUND YOU</strong></h4>
<p>Using patience to make a difference in the community involves several key practices that can help build stronger, more cohesive, and supportive environments.</p>
<p><strong>Practice Empathy</strong>: Listen to others without interrupting, and try to understand their perspectives and feelings. This shows respect and builds trust.</p>
<p><strong>Ask Questions</strong>: Show genuine interest in others’ concerns and ideas. This can help clarify misunderstandings and foster deeper connections.</p>
<p><strong>Stay Calm</strong>: Approach conflicts with a calm and composed demeanor. This helps de-escalate tensions and allows for more constructive conversations.</p>
<p><strong>Seek Win-Win Solutions</strong>: Focus on finding solutions that benefit all parties involved, rather than just winning an argument.</p>
<p><strong>Be Encouraging</strong>: Support others’ efforts and celebrate their achievements, no matter how small. This boosts morale and encourages continued participation.</p>
<p><strong>Commit to Long-Term Goals</strong>: Community projects often take time to bear fruit. Stay committed, even when progress seems slow.</p>
<p><strong>Welcome Diversity</strong>: Be patient with differences and encourage inclusivity. This creates a more welcoming and supportive environment for everyone.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>THE CONNECTION BETWEEN PATIENCE AND SPIRITUALITY</strong></h4>
<p>The connection is profound and multifaceted, with patience often considered a fundamental virtue in many spiritual traditions.</p>
<p>Patience is closely linked to the practice of mindfulness and maintaining inner peace. Spirituality often involves cultivating a state of calm and awareness, which requires patience.</p>
<p>Many spiritual teachings emphasize the importance of acceptance and surrender to a higher power or the flow of life. Patience is essential in developing this acceptance, as it allows individuals to trust in the process and timing of life, rather than forcing outcomes or becoming frustrated with delays and obstacles.</p>
<p>Patience fosters compassion and understanding, both towards oneself and others. In spiritual contexts, this is crucial for developing empathy and loving-kindness, which are often key components of spiritual growth and moral development.</p>
<p>Spirituality often involves a journey of personal growth and self-discovery. Patience is vital in this journey, as growth and transformation usually occur gradually. Pat</p>
<p>Patience is also related to the spiritual practice of non-attachment. In Hinduism and Buddhism, non-attachment to outcomes and desires is crucial for achieving inner peace and enlightenment. Patience helps individuals let go of the need for immediate gratification and accept life&#8217;s unfolding with equanimity.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-28523" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-4-1-683x1024.png" alt="" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-4-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-4-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-4-1-768x1152.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-4-1.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>PATIENCE FROM A BIBLICAL PERSPECTIVE</strong></h4>
<p>From a biblical perspective, patience is a significant and recurring theme throughout the scriptures. It is seen as a virtue that reflects trust in God&#8217;s timing and sovereignty and is an essential aspect of the Christian character.</p>
<p>In the New Testament, it is listed as one of the fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23: &#8220;But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance (patience), kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.&#8221;</p>
<p>Job is often cited as a model of patience. Despite intense suffering and loss, he remained steadfast in his faith. James 5:11 states, &#8220;As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.&#8221;</p>
<p>Abraham is another example, who waited many years to fulfill God&#8217;s promise that he would have a son. Hebrews 6:15 says, &#8220;And so after waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised.&#8221;</p>
<p>The Bible encourages believers to be patient during trials and sufferings, as these experiences develop perseverance and strengthen faith. James 1:2-4 advises, &#8220;Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.&#8221;</p>
<p>Christians are called to embody patience in their relationships and conduct. Ephesians 4:2 urges, &#8220;Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.&#8221;</p>
<p>Colossians 3:12-13 encourages believers to clothe themselves with patience: &#8220;Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.&#8221;</p>
<p>In summary, patience in the Bible is deeply connected to faith, perseverance, and trust in God.</p>
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		<title>Joy</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/</link>
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		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 May 2024 13:39:27 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#hope]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[joy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/?p=28320</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, compassion, gentleness, humility, authenticity, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach. These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to interpersonal relationships and society. They foster environments where understanding, cooperation, and harmony are more likely to flourish.&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/">Joy</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p><a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/empowered-unconditional-love/">Love</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/joy/">joy</a>, peace, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-patience/">patience</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/act-of-kindness/">kindness</a>, goodness, faithfulness, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/compassion/">compassion</a>, gentleness, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/humility/">humility</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/authenticity/">authenticity</a>, and self-control are universally appreciated qualities beyond approach.</p>
<p>These qualities are valued because they contribute positively to interpersonal relationships and society. They foster environments where understanding, cooperation, and harmony are more likely to flourish. Cultivating these traits can lead to a more peaceful and productive coexistence, and indeed, there are no laws against such virtues because they universally promote social good. They transcend cultural and legal boundaries, highlighting a shared human aspiration towards a kinder and more compassionate society.</p>
<p>Over the next few weeks, I will focus on these universal qualities and see how they can empower us to be better human beings.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Quotes about Joy</strong></h4>
<p>Joy is not in things; it is in us. <cite>—Richard Wagner</cite></p>
<p>Some give with joy, and that joy is their reward. <cite>—Khalil Gibran</cite></p>
<p>Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things are. <cite>—Marianne Williamson</cite></p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>What is Joy</strong></h4>
<p>It is a positive emotional state characterized by <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/10-secrets-to-happiness/">happiness</a>, contentment, and fulfillment. It is considered one of the most profound and uplifting emotions humans can experience. It can arise from various sources such as achieving a personal goal, experiencing something beautiful or amusing, connecting deeply with others, or even internal reflections and achievements.</p>
<p>Unlike fleeting pleasures, joy often has a more enduring and deeply satisfying quality. It can also be contagious, enhancing the well-being of others around the joyful individual. In psychological terms, experiencing joy can have numerous benefits, including reducing stress, improving immune function, and enhancing overall life satisfaction.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Difference Between Joy and Happiness</strong></h4>
<p>Happiness and joy are positive emotions that contribute to our overall well-being but often differ in their sources, duration, and depth.</p>
<p>Happiness is generally considered a broader, more enduring state often linked to circumstances, external factors, and achieving personal or societal goals. It can result from experiencing regular positive emotions, maintaining satisfying relationships, and personal fulfillment. Happiness is often described in the context of life satisfaction, feeling good, and having one&#8217;s desires met.</p>
<p>Joy is usually described as a more intense, but often brief, burst of emotion prompted by an exceptionally positive event or experience.  It can be felt during moments of achievement, spiritual experiences, or while engaging in activities that deeply fulfill. It is associated with a sense of profound gratitude or connection, sometimes to a degree that transcends personal circumstances.</p>
<p>In essence, while happiness can be understood as a more consistent state or an overarching quality of life, joy is more about sudden, intense peaks of positive emotion. It can be a component of happiness, but it can also arise independently of one&#8217;s general state of happiness.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Why is Joy Important</strong></h4>
<p>Joy is a profound aspect of human experience that plays several crucial roles in our lives. It helps to counterbalance the stress and challenges of everyday life. Experiencing moments of happiness or joy can provide a necessary break from the negative emotions that can otherwise overwhelm us. It has been linked to various physical health benefits. These include reduced stress hormones, lower blood pressure, improved immune function, and potentially even longer lifespan.</p>
<p>Joyful states promote relaxation and can help mitigate the effects of stress on the body.  These social connections are vital for emotional support and can provide a sense of belonging and community. Joy contributes positively to mental health by enhancing resilience. It enables people to recover more quickly from setbacks and reduces the risk of conditions such as depression and anxiety.</p>
<p>It enriches life&#8217;s experiences, providing immediate pleasures and long-term benefits to our well-being. This makes cultivating it an important endeavor in one&#8217;s life journey.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>How to use it to impact the community around you</strong></h4>
<p>Joy not only enhances our own lives but can also profoundly impact others and the broader community.</p>
<p>It is contagious. Maintaining a joyful demeanor can lift the spirits of those around you. This positive energy can increase morale and motivation, encouraging others to act kindly and compassionately.</p>
<p>Joyful interactions create bonds between people. Sharing your happiness encourages social connections and builds empathetic and supportive communities. These networks can become platforms for collective action on social issues.</p>
<p>Being joyful even in challenging times can inspire resilience in others. Your example can teach people that despite difficulties, finding moments of happiness can provide the strength needed to persevere and overcome obstacles.</p>
<p>Art and culture are powerful expressions of joy that can raise awareness, change perspectives, and inspire action. Through music, painting, writing, or dancing, creating art that expresses joy can touch hearts and mobilize change.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>The connection between joy and spirituality</strong></h4>
<p>Joy and spirituality are deeply intertwined, with each element enriching the other.</p>
<p>Spirituality is a direct source of joy. Spiritual practices and beliefs can provide a sense of purpose, connection, and understanding that contributes to well-being and happiness. Whether meditation, prayer, rituals, or community worship, these practices can elevate one&#8217;s mood and bring about a joyful state of being.</p>
<p>Spirituality often offers tools and perspectives that help individuals cope with life&#8217;s challenges. Spiritual beliefs can provide comfort, hope, and stability when facing difficulties. This <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/resilience-stress-management/">resilience</a> contributes to a sustained sense of joy, even in less-than-joyful circumstances, by offering a broader perspective on life&#8217;s ups and downs.</p>
<p>Spirituality often encourages the pursuit of inner peace and contentment that is not dependent on external circumstances. This inner serenity is a crucial aspect of joy that is more steady and enduring than the fleeting happiness derived from material or superficial sources.</p>
<p>Spiritual paths often emphasize personal growth and transformation. Becoming more self-aware and developing virtues such as compassion, patience, and gratitude can lead to profound joy. This is often described as a deeper, more fulfilling type of happiness compared to more superficial pleasures.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-28370" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-1-683x1024.png" alt="" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-1-768x1152.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-1.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong>Joy from a Biblical perspective</strong></h4>
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<p>Joy from a biblical perspective, is considered a profound, enduring, and spiritual quality that believers experience as a part of their faith in and relationship with God. It is deeper than mere happiness, which can be fleeting and dependent on external circumstances. It is often tied to inward peace and contentment in knowing God’s love and salvation, regardless of external conditions.</p>
<p>Joy is frequently described as a gift from God. The Psalms, for instance, talk about finding it in God&#8217;s presence (Psalm 16:11). The Apostle Paul writes about rejoicing in the Lord always (Philippians 4:4), indicating that the source of Christian joy is the enduring nature of God, rather than the fluctuating conditions of life.</p>
<p>In Galatians 5:22-23, joy is listed as part of the fruit of the Spirit. This means that it is a quality produced in a person by the Holy Spirit. It is not something that believers generate on their own, but it is a result of the Spirit’s active work in their lives.</p>
<p>Biblical joy can coexist with suffering. James 1:2 encourages believers to &#8220;count it all joy&#8221; when they face various trials, suggesting that it comes from knowing that these trials are developing perseverance and spiritual maturity. This perspective is echoed in other scriptures that associate joy with endurance and growth through adversity.</p>
<p>In summary, joy in a biblical context is a complex, robust emotion that transcends circumstances, rooted in the spiritual realities of God&#8217;s presence, actions, and promises. It is both a gift and a response, deeply woven into the life of faith.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-28372" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-683x1024.png" alt="" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2-768x1152.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Untitled-Design-2.png 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
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		<title>I Apologize</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/i-apologize/</link>
					<comments>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/i-apologize/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 23 Jan 2021 18:51:05 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#apologies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#apologize]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#apology]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#lovequotes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#qoutes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#sorry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#sorrynotsorry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[forgiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="i apologize" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>I am sorry, I hurt you, I apologize This week I received a message on FB Messenger. I recognized the name. It just said how are you. The person also wanted to add me as a friend on FB. I replied I was fine. He&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/i-apologize/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/i-apologize/">I Apologize</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="i apologize" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-6.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><h4><strong>I am sorry, I hurt you, I apologize</strong></h4>
<p>This week I received a message on FB Messenger. I recognized the name. It just said how are you. The person also wanted to add me as a friend on FB. I replied I was fine. He then went on to apologize for something that had happened more than two decades ago.</p>
<p>I was in a wedding party. After the <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/12-diamond-rules-of-marriage/">couple</a> had danced, it was time for the groomsmen and the bridesmaids to join them. I just went and sat down. One of the bridesmaids came up to me and said we should dance. As we started to dance, I noticed someone pushed me and started attacking me. It was the <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/ten-skills-required-to-be-a-successful-husband/">husband</a> of the bridesmaid. Over the years the groom and I did have a laugh about the situation.</p>
<h4><strong>The Apology</strong></h4>
<p>The husband had sent me a message because he wanted to apologize. I told him it was OK. It was time to move on.</p>
<p>I admired him. It took guts, humility, and vulnerability.</p>
<p>Some of us have hurt other people. Some of us have been hurt by other people. A classmate at high school or university, a colleague, a boss, close friends, and family.</p>
<h4><strong>An apology is a good idea</strong></h4>
<p>An apology is a social act, a nuance to be polite, to pay homage, and show compassion towards the wronged person. It is important for our physical, mental, and emotional health.</p>
<p>An apology is an amazing idea if you have caused pain to another person. It results in you communicating with the other person and connecting with them. An apology validates the other person’s feelings and lets them know you care for them. It creates a safety net. You have repaired the relationship and have made the other person comfortable around you.</p>
<p>Validation is the acceptance and understanding of the other person’s feelings. The other person got hurt or scared by your actions. This kind of validation is curative.</p>
<p>Apologizing creates boundaries and rules around the relationship going into the future. You need to take responsibility for where you were wrong. Your actions caused pain and hurt someone.</p>
<p>Apologies restore dignity for the person you hurt. It tells the other person that your toxic behavior is not OK.</p>
<p>An apology is important to social order as it allows us to restore ourselves when we hurt someone.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-22776" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-1.png" alt="apologize" width="735" height="1102" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-1.png 735w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-1-600x900.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 735px) 100vw, 735px" /></p>
<h4><strong>Apology and empathy are linked together</strong></h4>
<p>In order for me to forgive the person who attacked me at the wedding, I had to have empathy, kindness and compassion for him. His apology paved the way for me to see him in a more compassionate way. His humble apology made it easier for me to forgive him. I all of a sudden developed a deep respect for him and saw him from a different perspective. The anger and bitterness I had felt that night melted. I saw him as a broken human being. He was human. There was this emotional healing and it allowed me to move on rather than being stuck in the past.</p>
<h4><strong>Motive, demeanor, and a meaningful apology</strong></h4>
<p>The motive and demeanor are two crucial aspects of an apology. When done in person, the motive and demeanor are communicated nonverbally. There needs to be sincerity about it. If not it has no meaning to the other person. The sincerity must come from deep within to be meaningful to the other person. An empty apology is manipulative.</p>
<p>An intentional apology, along with sincerity and meaning is powerful and transformative for the receiver and the giver.</p>
<p>Do not apologize if you are being forced to or you want something from the other person. Never make a bad promise. The goal of an apology is to press reset on the relationship and to build trust. It also conveys the message that you are aware of your behavior, actions and will try your level best not to repeat it again.</p>
<p>A meaningful apology must come with a pang of regret, obligation, and corrective action. You must come to terms with the fact that your actions hurt someone, communicate it, and acknowledge the breach you caused. You must take full responsibility for your actions and finally communicate that you will not repeat that toxic behavior.</p>
<p>In 2026, we need to apologize a lot more. We need to reach to those we have hurt and make a difference in their lives. It will transform you and the other person.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-22777" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-1.png" alt="apologize" width="735" height="1102" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-1.png 735w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-1-600x900.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 735px) 100vw, 735px" /></p>
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		<title>Importance of Kindness and Respect</title>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 09 Jan 2021 19:16:31 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#bekind]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#compassion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#inspiration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#kindness]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="kindness" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>The first week of 2021 has passed. The thought that crossed my mind was the lack of respect and civility in our society. At school, it was important to say please and thank you. It was important to treat our fellow students with kindness and&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/kindness-respect/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/kindness-respect/">Importance of Kindness and Respect</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="kindness" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p style="margin: 0cm 0cm 18.0pt 0cm;">The first week of 2021 has passed. The thought that crossed my mind was the lack of respect and civility in our society. At school, it was important to say please and thank you. It was important to treat our fellow students with kindness and respect. It was even more important when we did not agree on an issue.</p>
<p style="margin: 0cm 0cm 18.0pt 0cm;">As I look at the news, Facebook, and Twitter feed, all I see are people filled with anger, resentment, venom, and cavil about anything and everything.</p>
<p style="margin: 0cm 0cm 18.0pt 0cm;">I have left so many Whatsapp groups because it is filled with differences in religious beliefs, political and cultural differences.</p>
<p style="margin: 0cm 0cm 18.0pt 0cm;">I think maybe I am naïve, dovelike, or jejune. The state of the economy, unemployment, COVID-19, the elections have brought the tension to a boiling point.</p>
<p style="margin: 0cm 0cm 18.0pt 0cm;">Last year, I unfollowed all my friends who spewed hatred or anger all the time. It was one of the best things I did. It helped my sanity, peace of mind, and health. If I do not like what someone says on social media, I just move on.</p>
<p style="margin: 0cm 0cm 18.0pt 0cm;">I love the discussions. If it filled with respect. We can and should discuss our opinions without derision or contempt.</p>
<p style="margin: 0cm 0cm 18.0pt 0cm;">The truth needs to be spoken with <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/faith-hope-love/">love</a>, grace, humility, and without ego.</p>
<p>Kindness is one of the most underrated qualities. A person who is affable, affectionate, amiable, attentive, friendly, considerate, and generous is considered kind. Compassionate, discreet, magnanimous, polite, unselfish, tolerant, and honest are words that are associated with kindness. To be kind to someone requires grit, determination, and strength. Kindness is an interpersonal soft skill.</p>
<p>Kindness is needed in 2021. Humans were born to connect and care for one another. To have sympathy and care for others is in our DNA. Research shows that those who volunteer, care for others, and give to <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/charitable-giving/">charity</a> are <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/10-secrets-to-happiness/">happier</a> than those who are selfish and self-focused.</p>
<p><a href="https://www.alexandraohudson.com/">Alexandra</a> is passionate about the way that ideas and storytelling can change people’s lives. She is an award-winning writer based in Indianapolis, currently working on a book on civility and American civic renewal. She is the curator of <a href="https://www.civic-renaissance.com/">Civic Renaissance</a>, a newsletter and intellectual community dedicated to moral and cultural renewal.</p>
<p>She earned her Master’s degree in Public Policy at the London School of Economics as a Rotary Scholar and has served at the local, state, and federal levels of government and policy—including a recent appointment at the U.S. Department of Education. She was awarded a 2019 Novak Fellowship for her original reporting and analysis on civility, public discourse, and civil society in America.</p>
<p>Now a full-time journalist and writer, Alexandra is an in-demand speaker and commentator, appearing frequently on local, national, and international television outlets such as CBS, Fox News, and others. She is a regular contributor to USA Today and also writes for The Wall Street Journal, TIME Magazine, POLITICO Magazine, Newsweek, and other national outlets.</p>
<p>I talk to Alexandra about her book and kindness.</p>
<h4><strong>Alexandra, a privilege to have you on board. I want to know something unique about you?</strong></h4>
<p>Thanks for having me!</p>
<p>Hmmm. Unique. Well, I’ve trained with the most famous and best pizzaiolo in the world. In Naples, Italy in the summer of 2018, I met him at a restaurant I was writing at one rainy day, and eagerly accepted a chance to learn how to make and throw pizza dough—and how to dress it the authentic and only appropriate way: tomato sauce, mozzarella, and basil! Drizzled with ample extra virgin olive oil, of course. A fun memory and skill to add to my resume!</p>
<h4><strong>I am a big fan of being gentle and kind to people. You are writing a full book on how to be civil in the political arena. Talk to me about it?</strong></h4>
<p>After a rather dispiriting stint in the federal government, I left disillusioned by the broken state of our public discourse and the lack of fundamental respect for our fellow citizens and persons—especially those we differed with. I both witnessed and endured some of that animosity first hand.</p>
<p>After I left government in January 2018, I dedicated myself full time to these important questions: What does it mean to be a human being? What is the bare minimum of respect we are owed, and owe to others, in light of our human dignity? What does that look like in practice today, especially when it comes to those we disagree with?</p>
<p>These questions have only become timelier, and they are the lens through which I approach my writing and work on civility. It’s about our shared humanity and the basic decency and respect we owe to others—which is necessary for both our institutions of civil society and democracy, as well as our personal flourishing.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-22714" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2.png" alt="kindness" width="735" height="1102" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2.png 735w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-2-600x900.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 735px) 100vw, 735px" /></p>
<h4><strong>Your mom is an expert on manners and has written many books. How was it being raised? Did you have to be prim and proper from the morning till evening and how did it shape you?</strong></h4>
<p>I have the best mother in the world! She’s called Judi the Manners Lady, and yes, she’s been in the manners business for nearly as long as I’ve been alive.</p>
<p>But she doesn’t just <em>teach</em> kindness and courtesy. She <em>lives</em> it. She is the most genuinely caring, thoughtful, and selfless person I’ve ever encountered. I think that is what gives someone credibility to talk about why things like manners and kindness are important: they embody those moral ideals of sacrifice and kindness themselves. I couldn’t have had a better role model growing up for what true civility was: utter self-forgetfulness, hospitality to the stranger, and fundamental joy for life, community, and relationship with others.</p>
<p>My mother embodied the spirit of civility—and she always knew that taking a social risk for the sake of friendship or relationship mattered more than blind conformity with social norms. She was—and still is! —always willing to be the first to strike up a conversation, say hello, or greet someone with a warm smile.</p>
<p>My mother’s work in manners, and her powerful example, ensured my early and lifelong interest in exploring the timeless principles of civility that contribute to strong relationships and human flourishing. It sparked my curiosity about the way that our habits and norms of social engagement can either promote or harm human community. It made me want to understand why we do things the way we do them, why some norms of social engagement have changed across culture and time, and why others seem to be constant.</p>
<p>For example, the norm of taking your shoes off in someone’s home is present in some parts of the world—such as Japan or Canada, but is not a widely accepted norm in America. While this norm is not constant across different culture, it has roots in concerns that <em>are</em> constant, such as concern for hygiene and also respect for the preferences of the host.</p>
<p>Norms are like the air we breathe—we rarely pause to reflect on them, and usually don’t even realize they exist until they are <em>broken</em>, and some expectation in social interaction is not met. My mother’s constant attentiveness to the needs of others and the norms of social engagement probably made me both aware of, and interested in, these ideas more than most people. I’m so grateful to her for that and so many other things.</p>
<h4><strong>I find writing cathartic. You are a master of the media. What drew you to it?</strong></h4>
<p>I haven’t always enjoyed writing! But I’ve always loved ideas, and when I realized that writing was an important and powerful way of getting ideas in front of people, I threw myself into being the best that I could be at the craft.</p>
<p>I love the creative process. The struggle to create and bring forth a new idea from the higher, more sophisticated part of our mind and soul—as opposed to staying at the level of fleshly, temporal pleasures—is always rewarding. It’s a uniquely human process, and also one that helps us fully develop and realize our humanity. It’s a beautiful thing, and I like to remind people that the creative process is something that we can all enjoy and partake in.</p>
<h4><strong>You appear on CBS News, Fox and write for USA Today, The Wall Street Journal, TIME, POLITICO, and Newsweek. I want to know what is different about you as a journalist? What is your competitive advantage? What do you bring to the table that others do not?</strong></h4>
<p>In some ways, we’re in a golden age of journalism: anyone with a smartphone and internet access can observe the world around them, tweet about it, and suddenly create a ripple effect of news coverage. Social media has changed the way that the large newspapers and television networks report on the news because they’re no longer the gatekeepers that get to decide what is newsworthy and what is not. What’s newsworthy is far more crowdsourced—a tweet or video reaches a million people in a matter of hours, and <em>that’s</em> newsworthy.</p>
<p>But this democratization of our news media—both from the journalist side of things, and the consumer side of things—is a double-edged sword. It’s great that we have more information available to us, and it’s great that anyone can be a reporter journalist if they want to. These freedoms are good. The downside is the way in which the virality of information can be weaponized and serve to further reveal and solidity pre-existing deep social, cultural, and political divisions.</p>
<p>What makes me different is that I care deeply about my work serving as a tool of social and cultural healing—not further division. My aim is for my work to break this vicious cycle of the way our media and information diet seems to perpetuate divisions instead of healing them—it seems that many journalists today care more about the <em>virality</em> of their work than the <em>impact</em> of it. This goal informs everything from the types of issues and stories I write about—stories of hope, uplift, and solutions— to the tone with which I write them—tempered, elevated. This approach can also be limiting, though, because there is such an appetite for information that inflames and confirms people’s preexisting opinions. But this is the approach I’ve chosen to take, and the one I am committed to.</p>
<h4><strong>I am sure you lead a hectic life. Talk to me about your self-care routine concerning taking care of your health, food, going to the gym, and staying in shape?</strong></h4>
<p>I try to take a holistic approach to self-care. Mind, body, soul.</p>
<p>First, the mind. The intellectual life is incredibly important to me. I am insatiably curious, and constantly reading, learning, and growing in my understanding of the world around me. Learning a new subject matter is like breathing to me. When I’m feeling discouraged, stagnant, or stuck, it’s usually because I haven’t been learning anything new, and usually, the resolution is to become inspired by reading something new and gleaning a new insight. Exercising our intellect is an essential part of being human.</p>
<p>Second, the body. I adore my routine at the gym—which involves high interval training cardio and some strength training—and my particular luxury is the dry sauna. I take a page from the Scandinavian handbook for health and self-care, and really enjoy the hot-cold therapy: spend 15 minutes in the sauna, followed by immersion in ice-cold water, and then repeat. It’s invigorating, refreshing, and amazing. One of my favorite things to do is to stretch in the sauna while listening to a lecture on philosophy or some new subject—combining care of the mind with care of the body.</p>
<p>For meals, I love the art of cooking and enjoy preparing good quality food that is not only enjoyable to eat, but also beautiful to look at. The presentation goes a long way to the overall enjoyment of a meal! This is especially true during the pandemic, where meals are often the one constant in our day and are something to look forward to. I tend to be low carb, high protein, and high in healthy fats, and enjoy a lot of Mediterranean cuisines and recipes— from ratatouille to carpaccio, from ragù to steak tartare.</p>
<p>Third, the soul. My ideal morning involves getting up early, around 4:30 or 5 am, and begin the day with reflective solitude. The stillness of the early morning is powerful and transcendent. I’ll do a devotional, I’ll journal, and I’ll read. I’ll re-affirm my values and priorities before the day begins. I do prefer this to waking up and immediately being bombarded by shrieking headlines and emails that require action. To me, this chaos for the soul. My joy, resilience, and productivity are astronomically higher when I start the day early and in stillness. Yet—amazingly—it’s still difficult for me to do with perfect consistency!</p>
<p>Some mornings, I’m tired and can’t resist the snooze button. Or I’ll wake up and go right for my email instead of being disciplined and doing a devotional first. I think that the fact that we <em>don’t</em> do things that we <em>know</em> are good for us—or, conversely, we consistently <em>do</em> things that are <em>bad</em> for us, despite knowing they are—says something powerful about the plague of human forgetfulness!</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-22712" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1.png" alt="kindness" width="735" height="1102" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1.png 735w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Untitled-Design-1-600x900.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 735px) 100vw, 735px" /></p>
<h4><strong>In the last 500 years, we have had some interesting personalities. Any come to mind who you want to interview or write a cover story about?</strong></h4>
<p>I love this question. You’re right, there are so many people amazing people in history that have accomplished things and lived lives and had insights into the human condition that can instruct us and help us today! My dream, actually, is to write popular biographies about the great men and women from our past that we’ve forgotten as a culture, but whose lives deserve to be revived, and studied for the lessons that they can offer us in our current moment.</p>
<p>One that comes to mind is Blaise Pascal. He was a brilliant French anti-enlightenment thinker, and inventor, and a theologian. He actually invented an early vacuum, the first omnibus system in Paris, the calculator, and many, many other amazing innovations. He anticipated many of the challenges of modernity to the human psyche—such as anxiety, despair, ennui, and restlessness—and reading him today is a breath of fresh air. He’s also famous for “Pascal’s wager,” written in his <em>Pensées</em>, about the reason to believe in God: <em>if you win [and believe in God], you win all. If you lose, and don’t believe in God] you lose all. </em></p>
<p>And he has so many incredibly penetrating insights quotes. “<em>We know the truth, not only by the reason, but also by the heart.” “All men&#8217;s miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone.” “Justice without force is powerless; force without justice is tyrannical.”</em></p>
<p>There is not a popular biography on this incredible man who so helped shaped our modern world, and who has so much to offer us today. I’d love to write it one day!</p>
<h4><strong>What does women&#8217;s empowerment mean to you?</strong></h4>
<p>Women’s empowerment is self-determination: the freedom to self-cultivate and becomes who we want to be. It means practicing discipline, self-denial, and aiming to promote proportionately and virtue in the soul. I don’t believe there are “male” and “female” virtues. There is just virtue and vice. Men and women are equally capable of cultivating virtues such as courage, prudence, justice or temperance, and just as easy to fall prey to the vices of cowardice, gluttony, selfishness or sloth.</p>
<p>True empowerment means the freedom to become the best version of ourselves—but also the ability to suffer the consequences of our own mistakes, and hopefully, learn from them to the end of greater self-awareness and self-improvement.</p>
<h4><strong>My daughter is 16 and wants to become a journalist. Give her some advice?</strong></h4>
<p>The key to being a good writer is to be a voracious reader. Read good writing constantly—of all genres and eras. <em>The Economist</em> is fabulous for good writing that allows you to keep up with global affairs, for example, but also read good stylists such as Oscar Wilde, Lewis Carroll, or G.K. Chesterton. Reading good writing helps you find your own voice. It expands your vocabulary to allow you to better communicate and put words into your own thoughts and ideas.</p>
<p>Also, it goes without saying, practice! Write as often as you can, publicly and privately. Journal. Introspection and self-awareness are key to being a powerful writer. Write for your school newspaper. Stay informed about local affairs and write a letter to an editor. Build a portfolio that can help you land an internship.</p>
<p>Most importantly, write because you love to write. I love Steven Pressfield’s insight in his famous book on the battle that wages in every creative soul, entitled <em>The War of Art</em>: define yourself territorially, not hierarchically. Don’t define your own success based on the success of those around you. Be the best writer that you can be, and be satisfied with that. Create for the love of the craft.</p>
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		<title>10 Secrets to Happiness</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/10-secrets-to-happiness/</link>
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		<dc:creator><![CDATA[admin]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 16 Dec 2020 05:00:35 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#positivevibes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#smile]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[compare]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[connect]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[forgive]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gratitude]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="happiness" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Happiness is not something ready-made. It comes from your own actions. – Dalai Lama XIV Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. &#8211; Benjamin Franklin Introduction Philosophers, scientists, and intellectuals have agonized for years over what happiness is.&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/10-secrets-to-happiness/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/10-secrets-to-happiness/">10 Secrets to Happiness</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="happiness" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Untitled-Design-4.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Happiness is not something ready-made. It comes from your own actions. – Dalai Lama XIV</p>
<p>Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. &#8211; Benjamin Franklin</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Introduction</strong></span></h4>
<p>Philosophers, scientists, and intellectuals have agonized for years over what happiness is. On a personal basis, happiness is not being high all the time or feeling ecstatic, being rich, or sitting on a yacht in Cannes.</p>
<p>When my daughter was young, we would go on long drives, and every few minutes she would ask, “Are we there yet?” Happiness is not the final destination.</p>
<p>In my opinion, happiness is being satisfied with where you are in life.</p>
<p>The pursuit of happiness is a goal for a lot of people. From my perspective and life experiences, here are some secrets to achieving happiness and contentment in life.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Never compare yourself to anyone</strong></span></h4>
<p>Our five fingers are not the same. Each snowflake is individual and unique. Every human being is unique and rare. All human beings have strengths, weaknesses, and gifts. Therefore, it is no use comparing your status, wealth, titles, education, or achievements. Each individual has their own story and challenges. Life does not flow the way we want.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Accept life is unfair</strong></span></h4>
<p>The sun shines on everyone. Good things happen to bad people. Bad things happen to good people. That is life. Never fight it. Above all, we are all on this boat called life. On the sea, there will be good days; there will be weeks of high waves rocking you and there could be a hurricane. Life throws all kinds of things at you which can seem unfair at times, for instance.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Practice gratitude daily</strong></span></h4>
<p>I went to a private British boarding school then went to university in Switzerland and now live in Canada. The truth is until I met Debbie I did not know how to spell <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/attitude-of-gratitude/">gratitude</a>. Gratitude is a choice. A person who is grateful appreciates that there is value in something which is extrinsic, cannot put a monetary value to it, and is free. Over the last ten years, I start my day by being grateful to be alive, in good health, Debbie, Jean, my parents, amazing friends, and a great life. In other words, it has changed me and I am not the same person that I was a decade ago.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong><a style="color: #ff6600;" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/to-err-is-human-to-forgive-divine/">Forgive</a> daily</strong></span></h4>
<p>This is my biggest weakness. However, if you want to be in any form of a relationship as a father, husband, son, friend, or mentor, you have to forgive. <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/to-err-is-human-to-forgive-divine/">Forgiveness</a> is letting go of the past. It is about setting boundaries. We cannot have resentments or want compensation for the loss or hurt caused by others. Forgiveness is not letting people take advantage of you, ignoring the offense, or condoning it. This is a work in progress for me. I have not mastered forgiveness completely.</p>
<p>It is critical to living our lives in love, peace, being patient, kind, gentle, and having compassion. I am by nature impatient. I have a long way to go in being compassionate.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Volunteer and give to charity</strong></span></h4>
<p><a href="https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-giving-makes-us-happy/">Research</a> has shown that giving to <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/charitable-giving/">charity</a> and volunteering activates the pleasure centers in the brain. When we volunteer our time to an organization it makes us realize how lucky we are. I remember volunteering in the Out of the Cold Program. It really made me realize how lucky I was to have a roof over my head. When I give to charity, it makes me realize, I am making a difference. It gives meaning to my life. Try it. You never know if happiness awaits you.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Do not have unrealistic expectations</strong></span></h4>
<p>If you want to destroy your relationship with your parents, brother, sister, wife, children, and co-workers then you can do it by having unrealistic expectations. Unrealistic expectations are unhealthy because it sets others and us for failure. It is assuming a level of control that we do not have in a situation.</p>
<p>I am a recovering perfectionist. Over the last five years, this is something I have grown the most. It has allowed me to be free. I am less demanding, less judgmental, more empathetic, and loving.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Deal with issues in life</strong></span></h4>
<p>I am a big believer in living a balanced life. The physical, mental, emotional, financial, and psychological self must all be in harmony. We must accept our brokenness. We must be humble and realize we are no better. We all have issues we need to deal with. It could be our ego, insecurities, anger, impatience, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, and other issues. We need to face them and deal with them. The more I understand my own brokenness and am in touch with it on a daily basis; it makes me a better human being.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Connect with your family and friends often</strong></span></h4>
<p>Humans are meant to connect. We are meant for relationships. We thrive when we are in healthy relationships. Research has shown that those people who have supportive friends and family tend to be less anxious and depressed.</p>
<p>Over the last 18 months, I have lost four close friends. It has been tough and challenging. However, it is my ecosystem of relationships that have sustained me through this tough time.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Focus on goals</strong></span></h4>
<p>It is important to have goals in every area of your life. Every year I write down my goals. It could be a simple thing like I need to read more books. Goals keep us focused.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>Try new things and pursue your passion</strong></span></h4>
<p>Before I met Debbie, I had never gone on an all-inclusive. I just never saw myself as just lying on the beach. I have gone on more than ten beach vacations all over the Caribbean. It has opened up my mind. I have also decided to pursue my passion for becoming a writer. It excites me. I have all these topics that I want to write about. I am focused and passionate about making this a full-time job.</p>
<p>It is important to understand that happiness should not be the goal. It is the byproduct of my doing all the things on a consistent basis. There are times when I have failed miserably. There are times; I have wanted to give up. But I just bounce back the next day.</p>
<p>Good luck and write back to me as to how some of these points have helped you to achieve contentment and happiness in your life.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-15946" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Secrets-to-Happiness-683x1024.png" alt="happiness" width="683" height="1024" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Secrets-to-Happiness-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Secrets-to-Happiness-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Secrets-to-Happiness-560x840.png 560w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Secrets-to-Happiness-80x120.png 80w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Secrets-to-Happiness-600x900.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Secrets-to-Happiness.png 735w" sizes="(max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px" /></p>
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		<title>Practical Faith</title>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2020 17:44:05 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#amen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#believe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#faith]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[#grace]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="practical faith" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Welcome to my series on practical faith. We eat food daily, so we understand food. We have a brother, sister, mother, father, son, or daughter, so we comprehend family. We use money daily, so we know its power. But faith&#8230; What is it? For some&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/practical-faith/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/practical-faith/">Practical Faith</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="practical faith" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Welcome to my series on practical faith. We eat food daily, so we understand food. We have a brother, sister, mother, father, son, or daughter, so we comprehend family. We use money daily, so we know its power. But faith&#8230; What is it? For some people, it could be Jesus, Chris Tomlin, Louis Hay, David Crowder,  John Demartini, or Esther Hicks. For others, it could be a get-rich scheme, the secret to success, or a method to manifest abundance.</p>
<p>Over the last 18 months, I have interviewed people from the <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-diwali/">Hindu</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/who-are-the-parsis/">Parsi</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/who-are-the-sikhs/">Sikh</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/yoga-meditation-and-mindfulness-benefits/">Mindfulness</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/minchys-the-richness-of-fresh-fruits-in-every-bottle/">Living Arts</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/sahaja-yoga-a-breakthrough/">Sahaja Yoga</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/catholic-church/">and</a> <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/the-true-meaning-of-christmas/">various</a> <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/pastor-mark-strickland-practical-advice-on-dating-and-marriage/">denominations</a> of <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/lorie-hartshorn/">Christianity</a>.</p>
<p>I want to delve into the practical aspects of having faith. Debbie has been fighting cancer for the last seven months. Karen drove in the worst storm, gave up her shift to drive Debbie to her surgery, and stayed with her the whole day. Alison drove 40 minutes to pick Debbie from the hospital. Karen and Alison do not follow any faith. However, the community has rallied around us. Over the last three months, Carolyn created a meal train for us; people are giving us gift certificates, someone is paying for my fence to be repaired, and so on. These people are putting their faith into practice.</p>
<p>Lori Beth runs a faith-based blog to encourage your daily life. She covers diverse topics concerning her faith. I ask her real, deep questions as to how faith can be put to practice, God&#8217;s power, building faith, and feelings are not facts.</p>
<h4><b>Lori, please talk to me about what faith is. I find f</b><b>aith is easy to preach, even easier to write and read about. Living it day in and day out and practicing peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, generosity, forgiveness, compassion, and serving others. That is when the rubber hits the road. Please comment?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Faith means having a belief in something that you cannot necessarily see at the moment. The Bible says that “faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Faith is easy to preach and write about. The real test comes in living it out. I think when someone truly yields their life to God and relies on the Holy Spirit, it makes living this out possible. I consider myself to be someone who has a strong faith in God, yet this does not mean I am perfect. I have my days where I feel I’m on a mountaintop, obeying God, serving others, and showing love. But then there are days I find myself getting impatient, acting in the flesh, disobeying God’s instructions, etc. And I believe this is just part of being human and battling with the sinful nature. When these things happen, I am convicted to get on my knees and ask for forgiveness and lean on God’s help to overcome. I think having faith in God is what keeps me going and it helps me- to not give up on God, and not give up on myself. It is possible to live a life of victory in faith when you consistently go to your source (God) no matter what. For example, if I have to forgive someone who hurt me deeply, I cannot do this on my own strength. But when I go to God and say “Lord, help me see this person how you see them. Help me to let this go and cast this onto you. I cannot handle this but you can,” there is a power in doing that and then I am able to show forgiveness. This does not mean it is easy. This does not mean it is instant either. But it means it is possible. I have to rely on God and my faith in Him more than relying on my own feelings. </span></p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-21584" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-1.png" alt="practical faith" width="735" height="1102" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-1.png 735w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-1-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-1-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-1-600x900.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 735px) 100vw, 735px" /></p>
<h4><b>Good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people. Faith does not always protect us. Talk to me about this statement because sometimes we get confused?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Bad things happen to everyone no matter what. Because we live in a broken world, even Christians will face hardships and suffering. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I think it’s important to know that as Christians, sometimes a lot of bad happens to us because we are being attacked by the enemy. God can certainly deliver us from these attacks and/or show us how to overcome the attacks and fight through them. What I love is the phrase “You take what the enemy meant for evil and you turn it for good”. We see Joseph say this in the book of Genesis. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It is important to understand as I stated before that a lot of bad happens due to living in a broken world. When Adam and Eve sinned, sin entered the earth. This left us all open and vulnerable to an imperfect place to live in. So we are not immune to sickness and pain. Bad happens as well because sometimes God is testing our faith. If we never faced hardships, our faith would not grow. We would have no reason to cling to God and focus on him if we lived in perfect earth. I think a lot of times we face tribulations because God wants to humble us, prune us/ cleanse us, and mature us. </span></p>
<h4><b>What is the difference between North American Christianity and individualism and the real Christianity of embracing suffering, being humble, and turning the other cheek?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Sometimes North American Christianity can be very self-focused. We may not say it aloud, but sometimes we act and believe as if God was the one created in order to make us happy. We like being comfortable and in control of our lives. We often forget that we are the creation. We exist for Him, not the other way around. We exist to worship Him, have fellowship with Him, and glorify Him with our lives. Sometimes that includes a lot of suffering. We can’t think suffering is a terrible thing, because truthfully suffering is what purifies us and draws us closer to God than ever before. To endure suffering for God is something that is honorable. I think North American Christianity gets mad at God for allowing suffering. While real Christianity understands that this world is not our home, so we will have to endure a lot of pain on this earth. The solution is not to run from it but find God in the midst of it. He is very present in our pain. The Christians in the book of Acts endured countless amounts of suffering, especially Paul. He was beaten, flogged, jailed, ridiculed, and killed. This was a man who loved God more than anything and look at what he had to endure. The disciples who walked with Jesus on this earth were also killed for their faith. But they were able to spread the gospel message and that is what mattered. Sometimes we as Christians can be very worldly in our thinking patterns and in what we expect from God. But when we decide to truly study the Scriptures, our minds can be renewed and we can be set free as we find what it truly means to be a Christian. </span></p>
<h4><b>The older I get I realize I need to become intentional to have health, friendships, relationships, and everything else. The old adage just pray about it, trust, and read your bible does not cut it anymore. Help me understand this better?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Praying about situations, reading the Bible, and trusting God are the first steps to anything important. These are the foundations of the faith. In order to have health, praying about it is a place to start. Then, you take action. This could mean exercise, cutting things out of your regular diet, being disciplined to say no to sugar, etc. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The same goes for friendships and relationships. I pray a lot about those things. The Word shows us how to be a good friend and how to truly show love in our relationships. Then putting our faith and what we have learned in the Word into action is important. It’s not enough to just know the right thing, it’s about putting it into practice. I have prayed a lot about purposeful friendships. I find that God always brings someone into my life when I pray for it to happen. Now, this does not mean I sit at home and a new friend just comes to my door of course. It means maybe I seek someone out at church, I join a new small group or ministry, or volunteer somewhere and start seeking out friends. So the action steps are important but praying that God leads is always the right place to start. </span></p>
<h4><b>Instagram is the land of selfies and the likes. Is that good for us? Should we really judge our worth with likes?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Instagram can be very damaging if we are not careful about guarding our hearts against pride. I think sometimes we incorrectly believe we are somehow more important when people pay attention to us on social media. If we struggle with insecurity, we may be using those likes as fake validation. When really, it’s a silly thing to do. Our worth is not found in likes, but it’s found in Jesus Christ. Jesus died and shed His blood for each one of us. He sees us as worthy. His thoughts of us need to matter more than anyone else’s. His approval is what matters, not the approval of man. So I would say it’s kind of dangerous to judge our worth in social media. Social media can never deliver us from insecurity, only a relationship with Jesus and knowing our true identity can do that. </span></p>
<h4><b>I love your article concerning the single woman. Talk about your own experience through that whole process?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Although I am currently married (just a few months in, I’m a newlywed), being single was one of the things that I struggled with a lot. I write about it in hopes to encourage others with my story. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When I was single, I had a season where I was content with that. I became very close to God and learned how to love Him above all things. I allowed Him to fill my voids, just by prayer, spending time in worship, and focusing on Him. There was a point where I truly did not want to date anyone because all I wanted was more of God and I did not want any distractions. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Then eventually, that faded as I got really caught up in my feelings. I got caught up in looking at everyone else’s lives. I especially got caught up at my age. People would ask me why I wasn’t married yet and that began to bother me. I felt pressure from those around me, and I also started to feel lonely and began to dwell on that loneliness. So I started compromising, lowering my standards and started dating just because I did not want to be alone anymore. I did not try to necessarily date Christian men, but men who seemed decent and would give me attention. After a few breakups, I found myself very broken. I realized I was forcing relationships out of loneliness. None of the men I dated were truly anything that I knew God wanted for me. I had always envisioned myself with a strong man of God, with someone who could lead me, pray with me, and seek the Lord with me. I dated men who weren’t sure if they even believed in God and some that did but just did not seem to fit well with me. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Eventually, I had to lay down those relationships. I felt very rejected during this time and I had to come to the conclusion none of them could truly give me the love my heart needed. I was very desperate for a man more than God, and that mentality had to change. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I started to do a few things to change. I fasted and prayed. I joined a group of young women my age in a bible study and we met weekly, discussing topics that were important to us and strengthened our faith.  I got a life coach who walked me through the reasoning behind my decisions. She encouraged me to wait on a godly man and not lower my standards. I resolved that the next man I would give a chance to would have to meet those standards of being a strong believer and that I could truly see a future with him. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">At this point, I was 30 years old. I was seeking a lot of new things in my life, such as a new job and a new location. I was praying and fasting for God to open those doors. I also began to pray and fast specifically for a godly husband. That year, God opened the door for me to move, get a new job, and eventually meet a great godly man in my new location who would become my husband. I love my husband and one of the best things about Him is his strong faith in God. He pushes me closer to God and does not try to take God’s place in my life. That is exactly what I wanted. So, I’m very glad I did not settle many years ago out of loneliness and out of the pressure from others to hurry up and be with someone. It takes a strong person to hold up their standards and not lower them. </span></p>
<h4><b>I am really a loyal person and sometimes wanted my friends from kindergarten to still be close. However, some relationships are there for a reason and for a season so no use chasing those relationships. What is your opinion on that?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s hard to accept that some friends really only come for a season. When we move to another area, another church, another job, we make new friends and it can be hard to keep in touch with old ones. That does not mean it’s impossible of course, I still have friends in different locations. But when you reach out to someone and they don’t respond, or it seems you are just drifting away and keeping in touch seems more forced than something natural, it might be a sign it was a seasonal friendship. And it’s okay to accept that and move on. It’s not a good idea to chase people unless the Holy Spirit is putting on your heart that you really need to remain connected to that person. This is possible. Sometimes hurdles present themselves but if God is putting in your heart that you should not cut that connection then you should listen. </span></p>
<h4><b>You are one of the few female bloggers that have written about sexual purity. It has always been part of the male domain. Talk about the harm that kind of lifestyle can lead us?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">There is a lot of harm that comes from sexual sin. I think one of the most important truths to recognize is that if you are in sexual sin, this hinders your intimacy with God. It’s very hard to be close to God if you are living that lifestyle because you are compromising by disobeying His Word. You are sinning against your own body and not valuing yourself. God’s will is that we all draw near to him, be satisfied with him, and live an abundant life of victory. But when you are in sexual sin, you are very distracted. I’ve heard the phrase, “How can you cast out a demon you are sleeping with?” And I believe that is a powerful statement.  As Christians, we have to be focused on doing the will of God for our lives and having a close relationship with God. Our vision can become clouded when we are in sexual sin. This sin can keep us bound to people who God never intended to be in our lives. It also causes a lot of emotional pain. Women, in particular, become very clingy to men they are sexual with. Then when that man breaks their heart, they are left with so much pain that is hard to overcome. Sex bonds you to a person through the hormone called oxytocin. This hormone is released during sex. Because of this, it is not easy to forget someone you are with. Then in the future, you might bring all that baggage into a marriage. Also, women are usually longing for security in a relationship and think that if they have sex with the man maybe he will stay around forever. But if we give ourselves away so easily, and that man has no reason to stay committed, he can use you and move on while you are left chasing him. I have experienced the pain of sexual sin in the sense that I felt a lot of guilt, shame, and I felt a wall in my relationship with God. It took me many years to overcome it and finally feel strong again. The most damaging effect it had on me was the wedge it created between me and the Lord, and it stunted my growth. This left me feeling very broken. So I talk about sexual purity because this is an issue that must be spoken about among women. We can avoid a lot of pain and brokenness when we save ourselves and resolve to live a life of purity. It is possible with God’s help and leaning on Him. </span></p>
<h4><b>I truly believe more harm has been done in this world through insecurity. You talk a lot about it.  Walk me through that maze of insecurity?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Oh yes, insecurity is one of the most damaging things that humans deal with. I think it’s very common. I have dealt with many insecurities stemming from childhood. I had thoughts that told me I was less than others, that I was ugly, and I was not worth much. Some of it derived from growing up in a home with a lot of conflicts. Some of it came from constant comparison towards those around me. I believe the devil has tried to use that against me to kill my confidence. He does this to many others as well. When we are insecure, we are constantly unsure of ourselves. We are not firm in our decisions, we have a hard time speaking up about things, and have difficulty connecting with others. It can keep us from doing the will of God in our lives. If we feel we aren’t good enough for a certain position or ministry, that is stemming from a place of insecurity. Many people know they are gifted but are afraid to use their gifts because of insecurity. Insecurity can also keep a girl in a bad relationship and chasing boys that are no good because she does not know her worth. In one season of my life, I was that girl. God helped me overcome insecurity by going to a retreat when I was younger. I also learned to speak the Word of God aloud and believe it. At one point in my life, I decided to fast, pray, and read books about my identity in Christ and godly confidence. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">God showed me where my insecurity was coming from and I had to deal with some past painful experiences. I would not say “I have arrived”, but the battle is not as intense as before. I stay in freedom by remembering the Word and prayer and casting down thoughts that don’t agree with God’s Word. God has taken me a long way. I have learned my worth is in Him and I definitely feel more secure in myself as an adult. </span></p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-21585" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-2.png" alt="practical faith" width="735" height="1102" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-2.png 735w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-2-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-2-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/Untitled-Design-2-600x900.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 735px) 100vw, 735px" /></p>
<h4><b>Prayer and being silent have been practiced since the beginning of time. Talk to me about the advantages and how it helps us?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Prayer is so powerful. When we just sit with God in his presence, He is able to speak to us and shows us things. When we get quiet with Him, we are able to deal with things in our hearts that He can reveal to us. We are able to find the true peace and healing that we need. Whenever I am stressed, I recharge by having alone time with God in my room. I put on worship music, I talk to him, then just sit and listen. I find myself always feeling stronger and more focused after I do this.  I try to make this a more regular habit. I think for any Christian, prayer is like your oxygen. And alone time with God is necessary. If we don’t do it, we will certainly feel negative effects in our attitudes and our minds. </span></p>
<h4><b>We may never have all the answers. I am ok with it. Instead of why me I say what now. Walk me through this statement?</b></h4>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">To get away from saying “Why me” and saying “What now”, is a really good thing to do. When we are stuck on “Why me?” we can get stuck in self-pity and bitterness. It can lead us to get angry with God and feel like our circumstances are unfair. But truthfully sometimes we will never know why some painful things happen to us. We have to make that decision to trust in God and ask Him how to get through it and move forward. God will always use our pain for good when we trust Him with it. God is faithful to work things out in our lives no matter how bad it looks like in the present moment. When we can release our “Why me?” to God, and instead ask God “What now?” this gives God the liberty to steer us in the right direction. God may be wanting to show you how to overcome the pain so that you can comfort others who are in the same pain. It’s often where you feel the most broken that you are able to minister to others. It’s often when you are going through the fire that God is molding you and making you more mature. It’s one thing to say we have faith, it’s another to hold onto that faith no matter what happens in our lives. I think God is pleased when we choose to trust Him no matter what. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’ve heard a story of a young wife who became a widow when her husband died unexpectedly. She now leads a ministry serving other young widows and telling them about how Jesus helps her with the pain. I heard a story of a young man whose wife died, and at first, he was broken. Of course, I am sure it still hurts. But God told him to use his energy to start a homeless ministry and he was able to bless those people in many ways. You just never know who you can help out of your brokenness, but have to trust God has a plan. </span></p>
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		<title>Discover the transformative attitude of gratitude</title>
		<link>https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/attitude-of-gratitude/</link>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 01 May 2020 13:20:23 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#believe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#grateful]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#healing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#inspiration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#meditation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#mindfulness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#nature]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#positivevibes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#positivity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#selfcare]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#selflove]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#thankful]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[#thankyou]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blessed]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gratitude]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[joy]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/?p=20241</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="gratitude" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Gratitude is an antidote to negative emotions, a neutralizer of envy, hostility, worry, and irritation. It is savoring; it is not taking things for granted; it is present-oriented – Sonja Lyubomirsky Prologue On a cold day in January 2016, I am flying to London, UK,&#160;<a class="read-more" href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/attitude-of-gratitude/">&#8230;</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/attitude-of-gratitude/">Discover the transformative attitude of gratitude</a> appeared first on <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com">Four Columns of a Balanced Life</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<img width="300" height="157" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-300x157.png" class="webfeedsFeaturedVisual wp-post-image" alt="gratitude" style="display: block; margin: auto; margin-bottom: 5px;max-width: 100%;" link_thumbnail="" decoding="async" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-300x157.png 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-1024x536.png 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-768x402.png 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-760x400.png 760w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8-600x314.png 600w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-8.png 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /><p>Gratitude is an antidote to negative emotions, a neutralizer of envy, hostility, worry, and irritation. It is savoring; it is not taking things for granted; it is present-oriented – Sonja Lyubomirsky</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Prologue</strong></span></h4>
<p>On a cold day in January 2016, I am flying to London, UK, to get trained for two weeks for a dream job. The same year, one of my closest friends, Bill McLean, died of cancer. I was like 2017 better be good. In November 2017, a high school classmate died of a heart attack. In February 2018, I was talking to one of my closest friends from university, and that same night, he passed away. His death hit me hard. It took me a good six months to recover. 2019 was going well. I had great plans for 2020. In one week in December 2019, I was laid off from a start-up, Debbie was diagnosed with cancer, and my mom’s health was deteriorating. In March 2020, the day I was going to get a job offer, the COVID quarantine hit. Talk about a perfect storm.</p>
<p>My parents, friends, and work colleagues were all commenting on how well I was handling the storm.</p>
<p>Do you want an abundance of physical, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/six-miracles-happen-when-you-see-a-psychotherapist/">mental</a>, and social bliss? How about feeling optimistic, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/10-secrets-to-happiness/">happy</a>, and connected even during challenging times? I am sure you want better sleep, self-esteem, high energy, a stronger <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/miracle-foods-that-protect-you-from-diseases/">immune system</a>, better emotional intelligence, and to build a capacity to f<a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/to-err-is-human-to-forgive-divine/">orgive</a>.</p>
<p>I have the answer. It is gratitude.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>What is Gratitude</strong></span></h4>
<p>Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation – Brian Tracy</p>
<p>The Oxford Dictionary defines gratitude as the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. It is derived from the Latin word <em>gratia</em> which stands for gratefulness, grace, or graciousness. When a human being receives something whether tangible or intangible and shows a thankful appreciation, it is gratitude. The person focuses on the positive in their life. Positive thinking helps the person to connect with something bigger than them, to other people, nature, and God.</p>
<p>Thesaurus has a few synonyms for gratitude and a whole subset of words and meaning attached to it. The synonyms are thankfulness, gratefulness, tribute, acknowledgment, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/appreciate/">appreciation</a>, benediction, and recognition for the good in their life.</p>
<p>Gratitude and forgiveness have been my two biggest weaknesses. I have <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/appreciate/">written</a> extensively in this blog about it. It was only after <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/interview-with-tara-lalonde-author-of-an-unexpected-freedom-discover-peace-and-joy-in-the-meaning-of-life/">marriage</a> that Debbie has taught me about these two amazing qualities.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Modern Psychology and Gratitude</strong></span></h4>
<p>Nothing is more honorable than a grateful heart – Lucius Annaeus Seneca</p>
<p>Martin Seligman a famous psychologist did something very revolutionary more than three decades ago. Until that time psychologists focused on negative emotions like stress, addiction, trauma, and mental illness. Seligman looked at altruism, compassion, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/10-secrets-to-happiness/">happiness</a>, <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/to-err-is-human-to-forgive-divine/">forgiveness</a>, optimism, and gratitude.</p>
<p>Robert Emmons is the world’s leading expert on gratitude. His research has shown that expressing gratitude has a positive impact on human beings by improving their mental, physical, and relational well-being, and the effect lasts long.</p>
<p>Randy Kamen another psychologist talks about focusing on what you have rather than what is lacking in your life. The goal is to retrain the brain and to see the positive.</p>
<p>Gratitude was always part of the philosophical and religious domain in academia. So, it is interesting to see Psychologists getting interested in this area.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>The benefits of An Attitude of Gratitude</strong></span></h4>
<p>I’ve had a remarkable life. I seem to be in such good places at the right time. You know, if you were to ask me to sum my life up in one word, gratitude – Dietrich Bonhoeffer</p>
<p>An attitude of gratitude is a choice, a habit that has to be developed and strengthened daily to gain the benefits. Gratitude detaches us and redeems us from negative feelings and toxic emotions. Gratitude leads to joy. Gratitude has a positive influence on the brain that is long-lasting. Gratitude improves relationships and problem-solving skills. Gratitude makes us better learners. It may seem contrived in the beginning but trust me as time passes you will notice a big difference.</p>
<p>The <em>Journal of Applied Sport Psychology</em> in a study in 2014 stated that gratitude improves self-esteem. <em>Personality and Individual Differences</em> published a study in 2012 that found that gratitude improves physical health. In the same year, the University of Kentucky’s research on gratitude found it improves empathy and reduces aggression. The<em> Journal of Personality and Social Psychology</em> in a 2003 study concluded that gratitude helped people in building resilience after 9/11.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>How to develop an attitude of gratitude</strong></span></h4>
<p>When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change &#8211; Wayne Dyer</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Keep a Journal</strong></span></h4>
<p>In 2011, research published in <em>Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being</em> found that writing a gratitude journal improves sleep. I have found this has helped me tremendously. I have a personal gratitude journal. It is easy for me to focus on friends that I have lost, setbacks in my career, career moves I should have made. I do not stress on coming up with things or making up stuff.  By keeping a gratitude journal, my mental health is better as I am not focusing on envy or resentment but focusing on the positive in my life and how blessed it is.</p>
<p>However, I am focusing on:</p>
<p>I still have an amazing set of friends from grade 8, high school, university, and the business world. There are a few in Toronto that I have been doing breakfast or lunch once a month for the last 25 years</p>
<p>I have a roof over my head, food in the fridge, clothes, money in the bank and two cars outside</p>
<p>Grateful for OHIP (free medical care in Ontario)</p>
<p>I am in good health</p>
<p>I have a job working from home</p>
<p>Living in one of the best cities in the best country in the world</p>
<p>People who we do not know cooking food for us</p>
<p>People driving Debbie to her appointments</p>
<p>Debbie and Jean love me unconditionally</p>
<p>I am one of the few people I know that have both their parents alive</p>
<p>As you focus on the positive, you are more joyful. I even tell Debbie, what if cancer happened a decade back? She was running a daycare and Jean was only 6. I have never created a fake sense of blessedness. I focus on counting all the blessings I have.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Say and write thank you often</strong></span></h4>
<p>Today I wrote a note of thanks to all the people who are delivering meals to us. I thank fellow bloggers for following me or inspiring me. As you show your appreciation you just get this great feeling. You are also nurturing your own relationship with the other person. Let them know how they impact your life. I also want to challenge you to write a thank you letter to yourself.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Practice breathing</strong></span></h4>
<p>I am horrible at meditation. One of the things I do is just sit and breathe. It calms me down. As I breathe I just focus on all the positive things that are happening in my life. As I am practicing gratitude I am also training my brain to focus on the positive aspect of life. As I breathe, I am also focusing on the positive that is going around me. The brain is calm. The positive affirmations are entering your subconscious mind.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Pray</strong></span></h4>
<p>I do this <a href="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/what-is-prayer/">often</a> and often go for long walks just to contemplate.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #000080;"><strong>How to deal with challenges that stop you from being grateful</strong></span></h4>
<p>If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul — Rabbi Harold Kushner</p>
<p>We all have a critical inner voice. That negative inner voice has to be silenced. If it is not silenced it can play havoc with us feeling grateful. If you listen to the inner voice you can become bitter and resentful and not allow any love or compassion to creep in.</p>
<p>I want to show an example of listening to the critical inner voice versus embracing gratitude.</p>
<p>I have planned a golf outing with a friend of mine for Sunday afternoon. I am looking forward to it and as the day approaches it is raining heavily. I freak out. I get worked up and emotional that the day is ruined. I take it personally and start blaming the weather for my mood. I take out my frustration with my wife. My perception was that the rain messed up my weekend. My negative thought patterns which started in my critical inner voice have now been blown out of proportion. It has a negative influence on my wife and daughter.</p>
<p>My friend, on the other hand, was also looking forward to playing golf. He accepted the rain and surrendered. He called me and told me that he will focus on cleaning the house and then cook for his wife. He also thinks the grass does not have to be watered. My friend made a conscious and intentional decision to make the best out of the situation. At the end of the day, it is all about perception. My friend surrendered with humility.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"><strong><span style="color: #000080;">Epilogue</span></strong></h4>
<p>The last few months have been hectic. I was going to work then rushing back, cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry. The truth was I was burning out. All my life from a young age I have been a volunteer. Even at the new job, I was driving people. Someone approached me at the office and said &#8216;Jerry, this is the time for you to be selfish. COVID-19 is happening and your wife&#8217;s immune system is compromised. You do not have to drive anyone&#8217;.</p>
<p>Someone challenged me to ask for help. I hate asking for help. The person reminded me that I am stopping other people from getting blessed. It was my pride and being a control freak that did not want to ask for help. And then due to high winds, my fence came down.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-20295" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200423_100105-scaled.jpg" alt="" width="2560" height="1920" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200423_100105-scaled.jpg 2560w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200423_100105-300x225.jpg 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200423_100105-1024x768.jpg 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200423_100105-768x576.jpg 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200423_100105-1536x1152.jpg 1536w" sizes="(max-width: 2560px) 100vw, 2560px" /></p>
<p>As a result of that conversation, I pleaded for help. I just explained what was going on in our lives. Carolyn Gerber who was bringing us meals for the last couple of weeks made a meal train, and the love, support and offers just poured in.</p>
<p>On Monday, after I was looking at the damage the wind had done and was stepping out, I see a van parked in front of my house. I see some young kids in the back of the car and the mother offers me food. Her name is Devon Dienesch. I am blown away. We have a quick chat and we have a few common acquaintances and I take the food inside. Debbie shows me the note with the food. Later that night I read the note and I just started crying. Here was this encouraging note from an innocent child.</p>
<p>I have a choice to focus on the fence and all the other challenges I am facing or seeing the goodness in all these people who are going out of their way and serving us.</p>
<p>I was then reminded of the time in grade 11 and 12 for early morning service at Bishop Cotton School, reading in front of 300 boys, <strong>Philippians 4:6:</strong> Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.</p>
<p>I remembered Arun Sachdev a heart surgeon visiting from Thailand and as Vipul Goel was driving us to Niagara, Arun started quoting <strong>Psalm 7:17:</strong> I will thank the Lord because he is just; I will sing praise to the name of the Lord Most High. I am like you still remember those scriptures and you are Hindu, dude.</p>
<p>No matter what comes my way, I will be grateful. I know many of you are going through challenges. It is not going to be easy. Be grateful.</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-20297" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501.jpg" alt="" width="2560" height="1920" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501.jpg 2560w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501-300x225.jpg 300w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501-1024x768.jpg 1024w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501-768x576.jpg 768w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501-1536x1152.jpg 1536w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501-2048x1536.jpg 2048w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/IMG_20200430_105346-scaled-e1588258668501-600x450.jpg 600w" sizes="(max-width: 2560px) 100vw, 2560px" /></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><img decoding="async" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-20261" src="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-9.png" alt="gratitude" width="735" height="1102" srcset="https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-9.png 735w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-9-200x300.png 200w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-9-683x1024.png 683w, https://fourcolumnsofabalancedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Untitled-Design-9-600x900.png 600w" sizes="(max-width: 735px) 100vw, 735px" /></p>
<p>Photo Credits: <a href="https://unsplash.com/@brookecagle?utm_source=unsplash&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_content=creditCopyText">Brooke Cagle</a> <a href="https://unsplash.com/@giancescon?utm_source=unsplash&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_content=creditCopyText">Gian Cescon</a> <a href="https://unsplash.com/@erriko_tsg_photographer?utm_source=unsplash&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_content=creditCopyText">Erriko Boccia</a> <a href="https://unsplash.com/@gabriellehenderson?utm_source=unsplash&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_content=creditCopyText">Gabrielle Henderson</a> <a href="https://unsplash.com/@priscilladupreez?utm_source=unsplash&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_content=creditCopyText">Priscilla Du Preez</a>  <a href="https://unsplash.com/@yirage?utm_source=unsplash&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_content=creditCopyText">AndriyKo Podilnyk</a></p>
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