#jesus Archives - Four Columns of a Balanced Life

How to find the right church for you

admin — Fri, 02 May 2025 20:02:53 +0000

That’s a deep question: How do you find the right church?

Churches have become commodified—focused on branding, entertainment, and attracting “customers” rather than fostering genuine spiritual growth.

In the last nine months, I have received more emails, calls, texts, and Facebook messages regarding the above question.

Choosing a church is a significant decision that can impact your spiritual growth, sense of community, and overall well-being.

In 2004, I had just moved to the Durham Region. I found Sanctus in Ajax. Sanctus changed my life. Sanctus’s preaching was biblically sound and Christ-centered. The worship style was contemporary which made an instant connection with me. The sermons were engaging, meaningful, and applicable to me. The focus was on leading a holistic life led by the Holy Spirit. Jesus was the focus of everything they did. They had small groups.

The transparency and accountability of Sanctus was amazing. The leadership structure was clear with a Biblical accountability. The integrity in finances, governance, and decision-making was impeccable. The mission and vision were evangelism, community service, discipleship, and mentoring.

The youth program was unbelievable. My daughter never wanted to leave.

The board was humble and as a member, we had meetings every quarter.

As I looked around at the membership the head of TTC, the VP from a Canadian bank, Professors from Tyndale, entrepreneurs and a vibrant community.

Sanctus has four sites and 5000 people in attendance in 2025.

It was hard to leave after 18 years and the hunt for a new church in the Niagara Escarpment began.

The first thing you need to know to find the right church is that Christianity is not a spectator sport. You will not benefit if you come only on Sunday and leave right after service. You need to become intentional in serving, joining a small group, and inviting people to your home.

The second fact you need to be aware of is that you cannot be a consumer in Christianity.

Finally, the church is full of broken, messed-up people who are looking for help.

For my emotional well-being and spiritual growth it was important to find the right church that was safe and healthy. I have listed some key indicators of a safe and healthy church.

Biblical Teaching & Theology

Church doctrine is extremely important because it defines the core beliefs and teachings of a faith community. It provides a foundation for understanding God, salvation, morality, and the purpose of life. The teaching should align with the Bible, encouraging faith, love and grace. To find the right church make sure that beliefs remain consistent with Scripture and historical teachings, preventing misinterpretation or deviation from core Christian principles. Christ, not a leader or tradition, is the center of teaching, worship, and mission.

The doctrine helps believers know how to live according to God’s will, shaping their worldview, ethics, and daily decisions. Shared doctrine unites believers, preventing confusion and division while fostering a sense of community and purpose. Doctrine safeguards against heresies and misleading ideologies that could distort the faith.

However, it’s also important to balance doctrine with love and grace. While firm beliefs are necessary, rigid legalism without compassion can drive people away. A healthy church upholds sound doctrine while living out Christ’s love. A healthy church also uses exegesis, hermeneutics and stays away from proof texting when looking at scripture.

Authentic Leadership who are accountable

When a church leader walks authentically, it fosters trust, unity, and a thriving spiritual environment. An authentic leader lives out Christian principles both privately and publicly and demonstrates a lifestyle of service, forgiveness, prayer and generosity. To find the right church look for leadership who preach but also embody it. The leader is transparent and accepts that he does not have all the answers. She listens actively, values feedback and avoids manipulation or control. She prioritizes people over programs and status.

An authentic leader handles criticism and conflict with grace and surrounds themselves with a team for spiritual, financial and ethical accountability.

Financial Transparency & Stewardship

The church should have open financial reporting with members in meeting or bulletins. The budget should show how funds are allocated to mission, salaries, community outreach and building maintenance. Members

Members can request and review financial documents without resistance or secrecy. A group should oversee spending, budgeting and accountability. Elders or a board of trustees should provide oversight and approval for major expenses or changes. The spending aligns with the mission and vision of the church such as caring for the poor, supporting ministries, and maintaining the facility responsibly.

Finally staff are paid fairly in a way that honors their work. An authentic leader will talk about giving from a Biblical perspective not obligation or manipulation.

A lack of transparency or a culture where financial questions are unwelcome is a red flag.

The Atmosphere

Does the church welcome everyone, regardless of background, lifestyle, past mistakes or appearances. Is grace and support offered openly or the focus more on condemnation and rules? Is sin looked at a pathway to transformation, or does it create fear and shame? Are differing viewpoints encouraged and or just shut down.

Does the church offer room for growth and second chances, or is there a culture of legalism and perfectionism?

A healthy church balances truth and grace—acknowledging sin but offering love, restoration, and hope. If a church feels more like a courtroom than a hospital for the broken, it may be judgmental.

Community & Fellowship

In finding the right church the congregation has to be warm and welcoming. There needs to be opportunities to connect through small groups or various ministries. A safe and healthy church encourages strong relationships among its members.

Mission & Outreach

A healthy and safe church should have a strong commitment to evangelism and community service. You need to check if there are missions, local outreach, and service opportunities. The church needs to have discipleship and mentoring in its DNA.

Family & Youth Programs

A safe church has a intergenerational component to it. There are programs for children, teens, and young adults. There needs to be resources and support for families. If the church does not have answers then they refer the members to counseling.

A healthy church needs to have a strong emphasis on raising the next generation in faith?

Prayer & Spiritual Growth

A church that focuses on prayer and dependance on God, that encourages personal holiness and growth in faith is the right church.

Size & Location

Do you prefer a small, intimate church or a large congregation? Is the church easily accessible from your home? Does the church provide online services if needed?

Peace & Confirmation from God

The church that we found, we were at peace and led by the Holy Spirit to be there. The contemplative approach helped me to grow closer to Christ and where my family is thriving spiritually.

Examples of safe churches and Pastors

I have known Dave Adams for more than two decades. He has pastored at Grindstone and Sanctus. Dave worked in the corporate world and has a great sense of humor and an amazing family.

I have know Jonathan Manafo for more than two decades. He is the founder of The Village. I have asked him some of the toughest questions about life. He has been through so many challenges but his faith never fails.

I have known Kevin Robbins for 35 years. A humble man with a great family. He has faced many challenges but has overcome with his deep faith.

In the last three years no pastor has helped me more than Matt Pamplin. Just an outstanding man.

Good luck in finding the right church and reach out to me if you are looking for a safe church in your area.

The post How to find the right church for you appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

The Significance of the Seder Meal

admin — Mon, 10 Apr 2023 16:04:38 +0000

What is a Seder meal?

A Seder meal is a traditional Jewish meal that is held on the first night of Passover. The word “Seder” means “order” in Hebrew, and the meal follows a specific order or sequence of events that is outlined in the Haggadah, a text that tells the story of the Jewish people’s exodus from Egypt.

During the Seder, family, and friends gather around the table to retell the story of Passover through a series of symbolic foods and rituals, including eating matzah (unleavened bread), drinking four cups of wine, and dipping vegetables in salt water. The Seder also includes reciting blessings and prayers, singing traditional songs, and engaging in lively discussion and debate about the meaning of the Passover story and its relevance to our lives today. The Seder is a time for reflection, celebration, and connection to Jewish history.

It’s Good Friday and I am heading to Andy and Gwen Groen’s home to experience Seder.

What does the Seder meal consist of

The Seder meal consists of a sequence of symbolic foods and rituals that tell the story of the Jewish people’s liberation from slavery in ancient Egypt.

Matzah

Unleavened bread represents the haste with which the Israelites fled Egypt.

Maror

Bitter herbs, such as horseradish or romaine lettuce, represent the bitterness of slavery.

Charoset

A sweet paste made from fruit and nuts, which represents the mortar used by the Israelite slaves to build the pyramids in Egypt.

Karpas

A vegetable, such as parsley or celery, is dipped in salt water to represent the tears shed by the Israelites in slavery.

Zeroa

A roasted lamb shank bone or a chicken wing represents the Paschal sacrifice.

Four cups of wine

Each cup represents a different stage of the Exodus story, and the drinking of the wine symbolizes the joy of freedom.

Haggadah

The Jewish text tells the story of the Exodus.

What is the purpose of the Seder meal?

In addition to these symbolic foods, the Seder includes reciting blessings and prayers, singing traditional songs, and engaging in discussion and debate about the meaning of the Passover story and its relevance to our lives today.

The Seder meal is an important part of the Jewish holiday of Passover, and it serves several purposes:

Remember Jewish history

The Seder tells the story of the Jewish people’s exodus from Egypt, which is a central event in Jewish history. By retelling this story year after year, Jews remember their ancestors’ struggles and celebrate their eventual freedom.

Transmitting Jewish traditions

The Seder is a time for families and communities to come together and share in Jewish traditions, such as reciting the Haggadah, singing traditional songs, and eating symbolic foods. By participating in these rituals, Jews pass down their cultural and religious heritage from generation to generation.

Reflecting on personal freedom

The themes of slavery and freedom in the Passover story can also serve as a metaphor for personal struggles and liberation. By engaging in discussion and debate about the meaning of the Passover story, Jews can reflect on their own lives and strive to find freedom from whatever oppresses them.

It is Good Friday and I am heading to Andy and Gwen’s place to experience the Seder meal.

There are 18 of us and we are all seated at the table.

Andy starts with Kadesh (benediction) explains the importance of the Seder meal and Gwen lights a candle.

During the Seder meal, we drink four glasses of wine to represent redemption in Exodus 6: 6-8 where God says i) I shall take you out ii) I shall rescue you iii) I shall redeem you, and iv) I shall bring you.

Andy reminds us that while drinking the wine, we need to lean on our left side and recline while eating as only free people did that and not slaves.

We now have the symbolic karpas (appetizer) where we dip parsley into salt water and eat it. Karpas when read backward refers to the hard work performed by the 600,000 Jews in Egypt.

It is time for yachts, the breaking of the matzah. Andy talks about Exodus and how God’s children crossed the sea. The children are curious.

The kids ask questions “Why is this night different from all other nights? Why only matzah? Why the dipping? Why the bitter herbs? Why are we relaxing and reclining as if we were kings?” Andy reads about Abraham and the miracles performed by God.

We eat the matzah, leaning to our left, and eat while reclining.

We now dip parsley in the salt water and eat it. We take celery and dip it in the charoset. We dip the matzah in the maror and eat it while reclining.

The matzah is wrapped prior to being hidden to duplicate how the Sons of Israel carried the dough out of Egypt.

We now have our delicious meal.

We now drink the third glass of wine and Andy recites the blessings.

We sing praise to God and drink the fourth cup, reclining.

After an amazing meal, we sing praise again and we say to each other ‘Next year in Jerusalem’.

I have an amazing conversation with Gwen about her life. After dessert, I have a deep conversation with Andy. I am deeply moved by this couple who serve us.

I am so grateful to Gurpreet Singh who took my family to experience langar at a Gurdwara. We learned so much about Sikhism and hospitality.

Jayshree talked to Four Columns about the Hindu festival of Diwali and how it represents the triumph of good over evil.

Sabika Hassan talked about her Muslim faith and Islam as a religion of peace, minimalism, humanity, finding resilience & strength in God during dark times, being grateful for the small stuff, and always standing up for the rights of the oppressed.

Farzana talked about Zarathustra as the Founder of Zoroastrianism. It is the world’s oldest monotheistic faith. Zoroastrians believe in one God, called Ahura Mazda, who is the creator of the universe. The basic ethic of our faith is Good Thoughts, Good Words, and Good Deeds. If we follow this, everything else will fall into place.

Four Columns has interviewed Ministers, Pastors, and adherents of Evangelical, Catholicism, ICOC, and various other Christian denominations in understanding Faith and how it can bring us closer.

Hospitality is the practice of providing a welcoming and generous reception to guests or strangers, often involving offering food, shelter, and other forms of assistance. This practice is deeply rooted in many faith traditions and can teach us a great deal about our beliefs and values.

One of the key teachings of hospitality is the importance of compassion and empathy towards others. Many faiths emphasize the value of treating others with kindness and respect, regardless of their background or circumstances. By extending hospitality to others, we can demonstrate this value in a concrete and tangible way.

Hospitality can also teach us about the value of community and connection. By welcoming others into our homes and lives, we can build relationships and form bonds that transcend cultural and social barriers. This can help to foster a sense of belonging and mutual support that is crucial for our spiritual and emotional well-being.

Another important lesson that hospitality can teach us about faith is the value of selflessness and sacrifice. In many faiths, we are encouraged to put the needs of others before our own and to make sacrifices for the sake of others. By opening our homes and lives to others, we can practice this value in a meaningful way and develop a deeper understanding of its importance.

Overall, hospitality is a powerful practice that can teach us many important lessons about our faith and values. By extending kindness and generosity to others, we can strengthen our spiritual and emotional connections and develop a deeper understanding of the world around us.

Today’s cultural appropriation police engage in overkill in realms besides religion. University of California-Irvine law professor Olufunmilayo Arewa: ‘The reality of human experience is that borrowing and cultural mixture are widespread. This is evident in language, religion, agriculture, folklore, food and other cultural elements. … Discussions of appropriation may also take insufficient account of the importance and benefits of borrowing. Borrowing has led to the international spread of denim, mathematics, and even democracy’.

Religious scholar Mark Silk argues that “Christians started off as Jews, and if we started to ask them to strip away all the Jewish textual and liturgical and theological appropriations they’ve made over the years, there wouldn’t be a lot left of the religion.”

I went for fellowship and to find out about the roots of my faith, I discovered it.

After attending the Seder dinner, I am more aware of the Jewish faith and respect it for everything it represents.

The post The Significance of the Seder Meal appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Lorie Hartshorn

admin — Sun, 15 May 2022 04:00:11 +0000

Lorie Hartshorn is a lover of Jesus, her family, and the local church. As an international speaker and author, her primary passion is to make Jesus known. She loves to see people grow in faith and experience spiritual freedom. Sunshine, books, cottage, food, and conversation bring her joy! I ask Lorie about life, changing careers, marriage, motherhood, and becoming a grandmother.

Lorie, welcome to my Women of Wisdom series. Please tell my audience a little about you.

Well, I wear many hats! A woman of faith, wife, mom of grown children, gramma of 2 baby girls (my favorite), speaker, writer, TV Host, Pastor, Leader, Educator, Fundraiser, Teacher… that sounds exhausting! LOL

The truth is, what I do is a part of who I am. It just looks different from season to season. I love nature, long walks, reading, sharing food and conversation with others, spending time at my cottage, and campfires!

Walk me down your career path from a teacher, to an executive, to a minister, and now a TV anchor?

I’ll take you back to my childhood when I would set up a school in my basement and make worksheets for all the neighborhood kids to fill out! My dad installed a chalkboard, so I was the coolest teacher on the block and I was 11! With my desire to teach from a very young age and a heart for God, I wasn’t sure if I was to be a missionary or a teacher so I decided to go to a school where I could combine my faith and my desire to teach. It took me to the States where I got my undergraduate degree in Education and Biblical Studies along with a Bachelor of Education degree from the University of Nebraska. Yes, – Cornhusker Football and all!!

I then returned to Canada and started my teaching career in a private Christian School. It was there that I started doing theatre arts productions with the students which led to 25 years of producing, writing, and directing choirs and theatrical plays, both in schools and in the church setting. I love storytelling and this was one of the ways that I could tell stories and also equip and empower others to tell inspiring stories.

I wasn’t looking to be a fundraiser, I mean, who would! But when I was asked to raise money for the school I was working at, I went to a one-day workshop and the presenter asked the question, ‘How many of you love to raise money?’…two keeners raised their hands…then he asked the question, ‘How many of you could raise friends for your organization?’ – my hand flew up! That was it! I was a friend-raiser! I had the privilege of raising friends for schools and then it opened a door for me to lead a Canadian Non-Profit organization, called EQUIP Leadership Canada, founded by Dr. John C. Maxwell. It was amazing to train and equip leaders both nationally and internationally with biblical leadership principles. It was in this season that my speaking ministry started to grow. So, my storytelling and teaching skills continued to be used in a new setting.

Then came the call to Pastor. I have always served in the church and in many ways, I have pastored people for years but this was a new role and call to the office of a Pastor. For 5 years I used my leadership skills as well as speaking in a large church in Canada, C4 Church, which I still attend.

You speak at many women’s conferences. What is your message and why should we listen to it?

My main message would be for people to experience spiritual freedom in their lives. I’m a Bible teacher, so everything I teach is based on the Word of God. I believe the scriptures are not only true but powerful to change people’s lives. I had a wake-up call in my life in the years that my kids were teenagers and young adults. We raised our kids in the church but each of them took a turn away from their faith for a number of years and made some very poor choices. We were facing addiction to drugs and alcohol and some very painful circumstances that caused me to question, not only my parenting but my faith. It was an essential wake up call to me that spiritual warfare is real and the enemy of our souls was out to destroy our family. I have always been a praying person but this changed the way I prayed. Both my husband and I got really serious about prayer and rather than being overwhelmed by the painful circumstances, we saw God do miraculous things. We saw him deliver our kids from addiction and mental turmoil and do a transformative thing in each of our lives. This changed me at my core. I believe in the power of Jesus to save us not only from our sins and give us new life but also to defeat the enemy who loves to keep us living a powerless Christianity.

How has motherhood and becoming a grandmother changed you?

Well, I already shared a little of my motherhood experience. So, suffice it to say, I love being a mom but being a Gramma – or Glamma – is the best!!

Mothering and Grandmothering make you real! Like the advice the skin horse gave to the little stuffed rabbit in, The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams, “by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

I have heard you talk about the challenges with your kids and how you have overcome them. please help us as we deal with challenges with our kids?

As parents, we do a lot of guilt but I have learned that it’s not all about me! There’s a novel thought. It’s important to deal with your own stuff so that you can better help your kids face their stuff but in the end, your kids make choices. Some you agree with, some you don’t. We are called to love unconditionally. When you experience the love and grace of God for yourself, and really learn to receive that love and walk in it, then you have so much more to give to your kids and grandkids. Live loved and you’ll love others better.

You have been married for quite a while, give me some practical tips on having a successful marriage?

Dean and I have been married for 33 years! Time flies when you’re having fun. Ok, it’s not all fun. But again, it is about learning to love and be loved. You have to keep it real in marriage. Don’t be disillusioned by Hollywood or social media. Love is a choice. You chose every day to love your spouse. You may not always like them Or agree with them. But you can choose to love and honor them in spite of your differences. We keep choosing love. We keep growing too. Deal with your stuff! Get to a counselor. Talk to wise people and avoid fools! You can’t give what you don’t have, so always keep learning and becoming more emotionally healthy so you can give that to your marriage and you’re guaranteed to win.

You are an amazing communicator. How important is communication in our daily lives, work, business?

Thank you! I believe that stories change lives. When we tell a story, people lean in and often say, ‘me too’. When a story brings hope then that transfers to another life. So, to me, communication is driven by what’s in your heart. For some communication is simply about dumping a whole lot of information or demonstrating what they think they know and perhaps hoping it will make them look good. But I think communication is a gift that is intended to create connections. If our goal is to sincerely connect with others and it’s motivated by love and not ego, then I believe it’s the greatest gift we can offer another human being. Communication happens not only in what you say but how you say it. It’s noticing people, it’s considering where they are at and trying to step into their shoes. I don’t always do that well, but I’m learning.

John Maxwell said it so well, ‘Everyone communicates but few connect’. My desire has always been to connect. Whether I’m speaking one on one or to a large crowd or to a TV camera. I simply want to connect with a message of love and hope. I want people to lean in and say ‘me too’ and reach for the hope and healing that is offered to them.

Tell us about your TV show and what are you trying to accomplish?

The 700 Club Canada is a daily Christian TV show that airs nationally across Canada. Its goal is to share the good news of Jesus Christ across our nation and beyond. I love the program because it uses people’s stories or testimonies to demonstrate to others that God is real, that He loves them, and that Jesus is truly the way to freedom, to forgiveness and to a right relationship with God. I love interviewing people and sharing stories….see the theme…and the best story in the world is the story that the Bible tells.

In simple terms, here is the message of the bible for some of your readers that may not be familiar.

We live in a broken world. We can see it all around us, broken relationships, sickness, wars, etc. but God never intended it to be that way. God’s original design for this world was that we would be in a loving perfect relationship with Him. But God gave us a choice and that perfect relationship was broken when the first humans chose to do things their own way. The bible calls that sin and it put us all into brokenness and separates us from God. We all want a way out of brokenness and for some that means, sex, money, power, or success…but all of these things just boomerang us back into brokenness. But God made a way out of brokenness! He sent His son Jesus into this world to model for us what it looks like to live in a loving relationship with God. Jesus was perfect but He chose to die for us on the cross and took all our brokenness on Himself. All our sins, all our failures, all our pain…He took it on himself. Then he rose again and overcame death and He asks us to believe in what He did on the cross and to turn away from our brokenness and to make Jesus the Lord and leader of our life. When we do that we experience saving! We are rescued from our sin, our brokenness, all because of what Jesus did and we are given the Holy Spirit to help us then live the life God intended for us and puts us back into the right relationship with God. It’s the only way to live. It brings freedom and healing!

In your book, you talk about spiritual warfare, help me understand this better?

Spiritual warfare is the reality that there are two kingdoms in conflict. The kingdom of God and the kingdom of Satan. The Bible unpacks for us how this all went down but to put it in simple terms, we can only serve one king, so will it be God or Satan. We have to ask ourselves the question, which kingdom do you belong to? Jesus came to earth to destroy the kingdom of Satan and He accomplished that by going to the cross. Satan thought he had won when Jesus died…but He wasn’t prepared for Easter!! Jesus rose again and defeated Satan. We are then told that we have to choose who we will follow, God or Satan? For many, they don’t think it’s that dramatic…I mean, if I’m a good person just minding my business, what’s the big deal? Well, that’s spiritual ignorance or blindness and the enemy doesn’t want you to know that you are essentially in a cosmic battle and on the losing side. Unless you chose to follow Jesus. He’ll lead you to the Father and to freedom.

How do you balance faith, food, finance, and family in the 21st century?

I don’t really like the word balance – as that assumes all things are equal. I prefer the word priorities. Faith is my overriding priority. I also love food and believe it is a gift from God for us to enjoy, so I seek to honor God with my body and eating good food and living a healthy lifestyle pleases Him and enables me to be the person He designed me to be. Money is also a gift from God and when we view it as a tool that we can master, rather than having it master us, then we can enjoy it without it controlling us. Dean and I made a decision early in our marriage to simply live within our means. God has honored that and we’ve always had all that we need. We also believe in living generously, as nothing really belongs to us – so that frees you up to not be controlled by money but rather to be in control of your money and enjoy blessing others. And family, well they are one of my biggest priorities. So, no matter what season I’m in, no matter what job I have, my family is the priority and I’ve never regretted that. I’ve turned down jobs and chose some different paths in order to keep them the priority and I wouldn’t change a thing.

The post Lorie Hartshorn appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Joanna Lafleur: 21st century’s Aimee McPherson

admin — Sat, 10 Apr 2021 04:00:14 +0000

Joanna Lafleur has an undergrad in communication and business and a master’s in theological studies focusing on how to use digital communication tools for evangelism and discipleship. Over the last 15 years, she has spoken at churches, conferences, camps, and ministries in North America, Europe, and Asia. She also led the creative communication team at Sanctus, a multi-site church in Ajax. Joanne Lafleur also hosts a podcast for Creatives and Communicators called Word Made Digital and teaches the Bible on a nationally televised Christian talk show called “See Hear Love”, now in its 4th season. She is a proud aunt to 12 nieces and nephews, a board member with InterServe, a songwriter with C4 Worship, and an advisor to the Institute of Evangelism at Wycliffe College.

Joanne help me understand your role as a director of communications in a church setting?

I typically try to explain it by saying that I get to oversee everything you see and touch in our church at a church-wide level. What I mean by that is signage, images on screens, videos, banners, graphics, branding, printed promotional cards, magazines, interactive elements within a service like booklets or stickers, church-wide emails, social media, photography, etc. By no means do I do all this myself! We have a great team of staff, volunteers, and contractors that work together to get this done week in and week out. Generally, all this is being done under my conviction that the Church has the most important message in the world, so I’m trying to help us be the best communicators we can be of that message, in our ever-changing, highly digital culture.

Talk to me about your TV show, blog, and your podcast. What is the ultimate goal of these shows?

In general, wherever I’m communicating and over whatever medium, my prayer is that I actually help real people. On the TV show, my desire is to communicate the Bible and who Jesus is in a joyful, practical, and accessible way that might encourage viewers who are going through all kinds of struggles of their own and need the hope of Christ. In my writing, I’m trying to provide practical help for real communications problems that people working in churches wrestle through every day, often with much less resource than we have in a larger church. On the podcast, I’m trying to help creatives and communicators see their work differently while getting an inside look at some of the voices in the field that inspire them.

You are also a pastor in a role held by men since the beginning of time. Explain the highs, lows and the challenges of being taken seriously?

That’s a big question! We could spend a long time talking about this, so I want to, first of all, recognize that it’s a big topic, and full of lots of emotions and opinions for people. That said, generally, I don’t want to make gender a big thing in the spheres where I lead. I don’t label myself as a “woman leader” when I walk into a room. I am simply, a leader. I’m not sure I’ve ever had an issue with being “taken seriously”, because I try to walk in the confidence of my calling.

Whether man or woman, you are taken seriously by leading well. Getting an education. Backing up the talk with action. Increasing your emotional intelligence. Loving the people, you serve. Becoming better at what you do by being teachable. Living with integrity publicly and privately. That brings lots of challenges, but I’m not sure they are uniquely female.

I would say the particularly female challenge for many, and it was for me, was coming to terms theologically with what I understood was the calling of God on my life to lead. It wasn’t just should I go in this direction, but actually, is this in obedience and alignment with scripture? I don’t think men ask that question when stepping into leadership, and for me growing up with very few models of women in leadership, it was a wrestle initially to come to understand the amazing opportunities there are for women to lead or pastor. Now, I hope the generation coming up after me has many amazing examples of men and women to follow after as mentors and models of leadership.

You are like me, you grew up in a couple of different countries and like to travel. What has all those experiences taught you as a person?

The biggest thing for me, beyond a desperate desire to travel every month, is that there are lots of ways to do things, and just because something is different doesn’t make it wrong. There are many ways to get to a similar goal: making a meal, raising children, leading a country, worshipping Jesus… all can have a few approaches with pros and cons to them, and we are more the same than we are different as humanity. I hope it’s made me be a more open-minded person to new ideas, people, and foods.

In life, we all go through challenges. Give me an example of something you have been through and how you are dealing with it?

A current challenge I’m going through is learning to grieve well. I’ve experienced a lot of deaths in my family in the past year, and my father who has Parkinson’s and dementia has really taken a turn for the worse in 2019. It’s a strange thing to grieve someone who is still alive, yet each month we lose more and more of who we knew him to be, so it is prolonged grief. I’m learning that I’m stronger than I thought I was. I’m learning to be gentle to myself. I’m learning what it looks like to serve someone who once served me. I’m drinking lots of coffee, praying lots for endurance, and trying to keep a great sense of humour about it all.

As a Millennial what are some of the challenges your generation is facing?

The biggest one that comes to mind, is that a lot of experts talk about this as a “fatherless” generation. A lot of the struggles for identity, purpose, career and education pursuits, financial stability, and more seem to stem from so many people lacking a solid father figure to guide them and love them in a consistent way. This is not my own personal story, but absent or just unavailable dads is a major marker of this generation. It leaves an amazing opportunity in the church for men to rise up and disciple a few younger people around them, caring for them with the love and wisdom of a father.

I have known you for a decade. Any advice you would give to your younger self?

I’d probably tell her to treat everyone with more kindness than she thinks they deserve, including kindness towards herself. And to buy as much Toronto real estate as possible before the prices went nuts

Rapid Fire questions

Favorite restaurant in TO

Depends on the occasion, but I love “La Carnita” on John St for out of this world tacos. And a little Italian place in Leslieville called “Frankie’s” that changes its fresh pasta menu every week.

Favorite café

Boxcar Social. Best coffee in the city (IMO).

Steak with which wine

Steak- medium-rare. Wine- I’m not an expert. When out, I usually just do the house red or a Cabernet Sauvignon.

Favorite beer

Jelly King, from Bellwoods Brewery. It’s a local sour beer from Toronto.

Favorite author

C.S. Lewis. A brilliant mind, and a life-long influence on my understanding of God. From a childhood in Narnia, to adolescence in his apologetics, to a seminary student taking a course on his evangelism style, to an adult finding comfort in a Grief Observed.

Favorite city

Toronto! And then: Marseille France, Amsterdam Netherlands, San Diego USA, Istanbul Turkey.

Name of one famous you want to have a meal with?

Famous people don’t appeal to me much. I’d rather have dinner with current friends or my grandparents who died before I met them.

The post Joanna Lafleur: 21st century’s Aimee McPherson appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

From Success To Significance

admin — Sat, 20 Mar 2021 04:00:36 +0000

David Adams is the lead pastor, planning and implementation at Sanctus Church. David did his Undergrad in Commerce and Economics from the University of Toronto and has a Master of Theological Studies from the Tyndale Seminary. Being called into ministry after operating in the business world, Dave joined the Pastoral Lead Team in 2008. He is responsible for the implementation of everything that moves Sanctus towards a shared vision. Dave is a husband to his wife Jen and together they have four married kids and five grandchildren. When not in ministry, you can find Dave on the golf course or soccer fields, like a true Irishman.

A few years ago, Dave challenged me to move from success to significance. He made me think about what my legacy would be.

As Dave heads to become the Senior Pastor of StoneRidge Fellowship in Nova Scotia, I ask him about the importance of moving from success to significance.

Dave tell us a little about you?

I’ve been married to my best friend for over 37 years now and enjoy doing life with her more than anyone. We love to travel together, especially to East Africa. I’m a bit of a sports nut when it comes to being a weekend warrior. I love to play soccer with the young guys to show them that it’s still a thinking game. I try to play golf as much as I can and when I travel, I try to squeeze in a round. I have 4 great married kids and 3 grandkids who I adore. I should have started with the grandkids, they’re way more fun.

What made you decide to leave the corporate world?

I loved the corporate world. I got to spend some awesome years working with really talented, smart people. The experiences that I had in the corporate world have helped make me a better pastor. In 1993 I was quickly climbing the corporate ladder. I had just turned down a huge opportunity at one of Canada’s major banks but was involved in a small but fast-growing software development firm. In the middle of all that, while I was reading my Bible, something I did almost every day, I felt like God really spoke to me. Not audibly, but some of the verses I was reading seemed like they jumped off the page. I believed that Jesus was asking me to make a significant shift in my life, to follow him in ways I’d never fully done before. One of those ways was to dedicate my vocational life to helping others by becoming a pastor.

What does an executive pastor do?

Actually Gerry, my title is Lead Pastor. I started at Sanctus as the Executive Pastor or XP for short. At Sanctus we operate based on Prompting and Planning. We firmly believe that God “prompts” us as an organization to do some specific things beyond common faithfulness. Once we agree on what those promptings are, my job is to make it happen. I’m the planning side of prompting and planning.

How important are a strong governance structure and an amazing board?

Irreplaceable. Without a strong board, things get bogged down in personality struggles, conflicts, and bottlenecks. At Sanctus we have a great board and a great board process. From a high level, the board is mainly concerned with “Why” and “What” while the staff focus on “How”. I also need to say that we all work really hard at keeping relationships healthy at the board level. It’s critical that we know and care about each other.

Walk me through your journey in your faith and what have you learned along the way?

Oh my gosh, how many pages do you want me to write ha-ha? I was born into a family that had faith only by association with the Christian religion. We didn’t practice anything related to our so-called faith. When I was 11 or 12 and still living in Northern Ireland, I went to a junior high weekend retreat put on by some people who loved Jesus and junior high students. I went on that retreat and it changed my life. I remember hearing for the first time the good news of what Jesus did for me and the free gift of salvation offered by God for everyone. Since then life has been full of ups and downs, some really high and some clinically low. But my faith in Jesus has never wavered, he changed my life.

Men have a tough time from the mid-40s to mid-50s. You have come out with flying colors through it. Tell us some of the challenges and victories?

Great question. Most guys spend the vast majority of their time trying to be successful, whatever that means to them. For most its about money, sex, and power. What happens to a lot of guys who take the time to think, ponder, read and listen, is they start to make a shift from success to significance. They start thinking about legacy more than prosperity. They begin to value a relationship with the spouse, kids, grandkids, friends more than money. By the time you hit your 50’s you realize you’re more than half done your life and I think a lot of guys feel like their coming up short.

You take two weeks of your own vacation time and serve in Uganda. Tell us a little about it and why do you do it?

In 2007 my wife and I spent 4 months in East Africa that was life-changing. We fell in love with the place and the people. But as we hung out in church every week, we began to notice that there was a leadership void. Great people were trying the best they could but often they didn’t have the resources (money, education, skills, experience) to lead effectively. I knew we could do something about it. In addition, there are tons of kids who live on the streets because they’ve been orphaned by HIV/AIDS or they’ve been abused or a thousand other reasons. We knew we could do something about that too. But when we got to the point where we both felt we HAD to do something about it, we knew we were in for a wild ride. So, we looked for a great organization to partner with and found International Teams Canada and got involved in their Impact Uganda Program.

What is your favorite vegetable with a nice steak, fries and a glass of red wine?

Fries IS the vegetable with the steak. I have a great dislike, even hatred of veggies. I try to pull it off as a life-threatening allergy but most people just look at me funny.

Why is grace, redemption and forgiveness important in your faith?

Just think about the words. Grace, getting something that I never deserved. God’s unmerited favor to me. Redemption, I have been bought out of spiritual slavery at a great price. One that I could never have afforded but Jesus paid it on my behalf. Forgiveness, everything that I’ve ever done that falls short of God’s perfect, the holy standard has been forgiven. The penalty that should have been mine for falling so far short has been paid by Jesus. These things are so wonderful to think about and only attainable through faith in Jesus.

You are a husband, son, father and grandfather. Give some advice to us young men out there who are just beginning to navigate those roles?

We live in a child-centric culture. Make sure to always cultivate your relationship with your wife. Long after the kids are gone, even after a victory lap back at home again, there’ll just be you and her. Make sure you’re still friends and still in love. But that only happens if you stay connected throughout the journey. Second, don’t get sucked into consumerism. It can happen with stuff but it can also happen with relationships. Don’t like the one you have? Toss it/her in the garbage and get a newer model. That kind of thinking and that way of life only leads to heartache for you and a whole bunch of other people. Third, try to laugh every day. Ok well at least try to smile, it won’t kill you.

The post From Success To Significance appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Life as a Pastor’s Wife

admin — Sat, 28 Nov 2020 15:42:34 +0000

The life of a pastor’s wife is not easy. There is this expectation that she has to be perfect, together, perfect family, perfect marriage, perfect children. Unrealistic expectations can freeze someone.

The next time you run into the wife of a pastor, minister, or evangelist, remember she is human, fragile, broken, and hurting. She knows she is being watched. She can also be lonely. Reach out to her and give her a big hug and just love her.

The role of the pastor’s wife has changed as time has passed. It is not about just playing the piano on Sundays or making sure the coffee meetings are taken care of. They are modern managers who have to multitask and meet the demands of the congregation. They are the quarterback of the team.

I catch up with Carrie Pankratz, who blogs about being the wife of a minister. She is real, vulnerable, and funny. This interview is a tribute to all the women all over the world who serve as the wives of a pastor, minister, or evangelist. My hats off to you.

Carrie, I have never interviewed a pastor’s wife. So, let’s get real and talk. I want to know something important about you?

Thank you so much for taking the time to get to know me.

Growing up, I had always wanted to be a wife and a mom. I got married just before I turned 27, which was pretty old in my circle of friends. Before I got married, I worked with children with disabilities, worked at a preschool, and served as a youth worker in my church. I loved pouring into the lives of others.

I have now been married for 17 years to my best friend, who happens to be a pastor. It’s funny that the qualities that made me fall in love with him are also the same qualities that sometimes make me frustrated now. He is the most selfless and generous person I know. When we were dating, friends would always come to him for help. He would drop everything to go work on someone’s car or help them move. That was extremely attractive to me. I love his servant’s heart. But now, in my selfishness, I am sometimes jealous of his time. I have my moments where I don’t want to share him.

He wasn’t planning on becoming a pastor. He was attending a very academic Seminary to get his Ph.D. and teach Christianity at a secular university. I thought I was going to be a professor’s wife. God changed his heart one day when a woman at a nursing home said these words to him. “If Christians knew how lonely we were, they would come to visit us more often,” That one sentence broke his heart and changed the direction of our life.

God calls us to care for the widow and the orphan. This woman was a widow, and she was also blind. God brought her into our lives to help us see. She reminded us of what is essential. That was when my husband knew that his calling was to be a pastor; to care for the poor, help the needy, and ultimately introduce people to Jesus.

In our first five years of marriage, he was an associate pastor at a pretty large church. There were not many expectations placed on me, which was good because I was trying to figure out how to be a wife. My parents divorced when I was ten, and I didn’t have a great example of what a healthy marriage looked like at the time. Both of my parents eventually remarried, but I wasn’t super receptive to the new relationships in my teenage years. In adulthood, I have come to treasure the relationships I have with my step-parents.

How has the role of the wife of a pastor changed over the years?

I became a Christian at twenty-one and had a wonderful pastor’s wife befriend me and mentor me. She is everything I imagined the stereotypical pastor’s wife should be. She was quiet, gentle, dressed very modestly, and involved in many church areas. I never heard her complain. She seemed like the perfect Proverbs 31 woman. I was pretty naive back then and am sure she would laugh at me describing her that way, but she was lovely. She seemed to have it all together. I think that used to be the expectation of a pastor’s wife, and to some extent, it still is. A pastor’s wife should have it all together in both their faith and in their family. I definitely don’t.

People have unrealistic expectations of the pastor and his wife. No pressure.. talk to me about that and how you deal with it?

Well, this is a tricky one. I have been very blessed to serve a congregation that allows me to be myself, yet I still feel the expectations I described above. Honestly, I think I may put them on myself.

I often feel like I do not measure up to the role of the pastor’s wife. I’m not a perfect wife or mother. The number of mistakes I make is laughable. I don’t always dress beautifully, nor do I play the piano. (I don’t know why, but I feel like pastor’s wives should be able to do that) If I could live in yoga pants, I would. Sometimes it takes everything to get me up and ready for church in jeans and a hoodie. I get frustrated with people and feel resentment at times. I am incredibly aware of my sinfulness. I would love to be that Proverbs 31 woman, but God is still working in me.

I sometimes struggle to find where I, Carrie, fit in the church since I spend so much time filling in gaps that need filling. My husband has an evident calling of pastor and teacher. My role continues to change. I think I have served in just about every ministry of the church. I do it because I want to help, and I love the people in this church like family. Sometimes, just like with family, this causes resentment when I feel like I’m doing all the work. Like Mary and Martha in the bible, I can fall into the trap of focusing on the serving and forgetting to sit at Jesus’ feet and enjoy Him. The minute I take my eyes off of Jesus and His plans for His church, I make myself miserable.

At times I have felt judged because I am not at every event or if my kids are running around the church. I have two extremely active and energetic boys who have grown up with our church as a second home. I have tried my best to help them love the time we spend there. When nobody is there, it turns into their playground. They are making great memories, but not everyone is okay with that. I am not a perfect mother.

It has helped that I have friends who are also the pastor’s wives and feel the same. These are women that I adore and are there for me. They are not perfect either, but they are there for support and encouragement. I want to be that for others as well. Any pastor’s wives out there who may be struggling, please reach out. I’d love to encourage you.

How has motherhood and marriage changed you? I mean you are married to the perfect guy…

Marriage has changed me in so many ways. It has helped me realize how selfish and scheduled I was. It’s funny. I thought I was really easy going and flexible. It turns out that I was only that way when I was in complete control over what I was doing. Throw another person in the mix and I’m a mess. Marriage also helped me understand a different kind of love. My husband knows me better than any other human at this point. He sees me at my best and at my worst. It is in those moments of my worst when he shows me grace after I’ve been a complete jerk, that I truly understand love. It feels safe. It’s a much smaller version of what we see in God’s love, only God knows the ugliness of my heart and still loves and accepts me. I also feel like I am better with him. He pushes me to become the best version of myself… just by how he lives his life. He’s not perfect, but he really is perfect for me. I feel blessed to be on this journey with him for sure.

Motherhood has probably brought about the most change. The amount of love that you can have in your heart for your children is pretty overwhelming. My momma bear comes out easily if anyone has hurt them or I think there is a chance that someone could. Watch out! lol

Parenting is all a big learning process filled with mistakes. I have had to apologize so many times since becoming a mom. I also have an entirely new and deeper understanding of God’s grace. No matter what my kids do, I will always love them. I want what is best for them regardless of whether or not they deserve it. I am willing to give up more for them than I ever imagined I would. If an imperfect person like me can love and forgive that much, imagine a perfect God.

I also found parenting to be more difficult than I envisioned. As someone who wanted to be a wife and mom for as long as I can remember, I struggled a lot. Especially in the baby and toddler phase. I didn’t enjoy every moment, and then I felt guilty about that. I was supposed to be really good at this. I was an infant-toddler teacher before I had kids, but parenting was so much harder. Sleep deprivation and completely losing my identity really had an effect on me. I may even have had some depression as I look back. I wish I would have talked to my doctor about it. I do, however, love the stage that we are in now. I fear that it is going to go by too fast… unlike the toddler phase that felt like it took forever!

I like your article on the difference between cliques and close friendships. Talk a little more about that?

One thing I really struggle with as a pastor’s wife is finding people I can trust and be “not okay” around. That kind of friendship takes time. I have a couple of those friends in my life right now. I also have a small group at church that I am involved in. We meet for bible study, share our struggles, and pray for each other. They check on me and hold me accountable. I think everyone needs those types of people. We can’t be best friends with everyone we meet. Sometimes people see groups of friends who have known each other for a while and call them cliques. I don’t believe they are. Cliques are groups of people who don’t let other people in. Those are not okay in the church. We want everyone to feel loved and included. I think there is a time, though, for meeting with only people you feel safe with. We all need to find a group like that.

We were born and meant to connect. I like how you differentiate between extroverts and introverts. How does that look like in a church setting?

The main difference between extroverts and introverts is that extroverts get energy from being around others while introverts recharge alone. When it comes to church, this is something I am still trying to figure out. I am an outgoing introvert. I need my downtime, or I start to go crazy, yet to others, I appear to be an extrovert. I like people, but sometimes get awkward in groups. I am much more comfortable in an intimate setting with just one or two people. Sometimes at church, the shy introverts can get missed because they don’t feel comfortable showing up to a women’s group or even reaching out when they have needs. Hanging out in big groups all the time is exhausting. I think it is important for people in the church to invite others into their homes. To get to know them in a smaller, more personal sort of setting. Some of my favorite people seem to be much different than me at first, but when I take the time to get to know them in this way, outside of a big group, I find that we have very much in common.

Walk me through the city you live in, the people, the culture, the food, and the restaurants?

I live in a suburb north of Salt Lake City in Utah. Most of the people who live here are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Some would call them Mormon, but that is no longer a preferred term by members). It is a lovely, family-friendly place to live. Our neighbors are wonderful. Coming from Southern California, it is a completely different culture. I appreciate the small-town feel, yet it is very close to the city which is filled with fun restaurants and culture. I love it here. Even though we are not part of the predominant religion, we have, for the most part, been accepted by others.

How do you manage finances on a minister’s salary?

We have always lived pretty frugally. Although we are not “rolling in dough”, we have always had enough. In times of need, everything was provided by the generosity of others. Honestly, I feel that we have been greatly blessed. We lived on one income for many years and were able to get out of debt except for our mortgage. Our cars are old, but they are paid off and get us where we need to go. When I started working, we put a good portion of that into savings. Going back to work has provided some much-needed vacations for our family. I had no idea how much we needed that time until we experienced it.

I am sure it is tough to maintain boundaries and have ‘time’ for self-care. Walk me through your process?

This is a constant struggle for me and I need to be better. I love to read my Bible in the morning and listen to podcasts on my drive to work. This doesn’t happen every day, but it is happening more regularly than it did while I was teaching. Recently I started a “time budget” to try my best to devote time to the things that are important to me. I have become very protective of our family time because my husband has a job where unpredictable things happen. Many family dinners are interrupted by emergency phone calls. He will leave to counsel someone or head out to a hospital to pray. I don’t get mad about those things because it is why we are doing what we are doing. But, it can be frustrating.

Spending more time with my kids and husband since I quit teaching has actually been the best self-care for me. I feel like myself again and am doing what I love. Friday nights are our family nights where we eat pizza and watch a movie together. It is a tradition that my kids love, and it is easy for us since we are usually pretty tired by Friday night. Other than that, my self-care has been pretty non-existent since the pandemic started.

Before COVID, my husband and I participated in an exercise boot camp together every morning, but we stopped in March and haven’t resumed again due to the cost. I am really feeling the impact it is having on my physical and mental health. My day is better when I begin with a workout. It is also something that my husband and I were doing together. I love that. He makes things more fun. We would laugh a lot and make up our own silly exercises.

One new thing that feels like self-care, but I’m not sure if it counts, is writing my blog. For the first time in years, I have an outlet for my thoughts. I love it and it is really filling me. I just need to make sure I don’t let it take away from my family. Our time is so limited.

I want some practical advice on how we can use peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, compassion, hospitality, charity, unconditional love, and forgiveness in our lives?

I have always been a rule follower. So, for me, religion made sense. I could follow the rules and then God would give me what I deserved. I thought I was a really good person because I was a “good deed doer” The problem was that I would look down on others who didn’t fit my perception of “good”. I viewed peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, compassion, hospitality, charity, unconditional love, and forgiveness as more things I needed to do to check off the list. I did good things, but in my heart, I thought I was better than everyone else and I felt like God owed me something.

It wasn’t until I started to realize how ugly my heart actually was that I actually became a Christian and began to exhibit those qualities in my life. Once I realized how much I needed those things to be shown to me and then understood that Jesus gives me all of that… even when I don’t deserve it. He shows me compassion when I am at my worst. He forgave me even when I turned away from Him. He shows me kindness when I am kicking and screaming like a toddler. Wow. That was huge for me. It broke me, but it the best way possible. Then… those things naturally started to flow out of me to others.

I think the way we practically use these things in our lives is to recognize that we are not perfect. It’s much easier to love others when we are filled with God’s love. We can choose to see others the way God sees them, and love them accordingly.

Finally, if I come to your church can I invite myself for a nice meal at your home or at any member’s home?

I would love to have you and your family over to my home for a meal! It might be a rotisserie chicken from Costco turned into street tacos, but I would love to get to know you more. That is the important part. And while I can’t speak for everyone in my church, the people that God has allowed my husband and me to serve here in Utah are some of the most loving, generous, and accepting people I have ever met. I know that you would be welcomed with open arms, offered a place for your family to stay, and a delicious meal. Probably much better than the meal you will receive at my house. lol.

The post Life as a Pastor’s Wife appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

Child of God

admin — Sun, 26 Jul 2020 17:45:09 +0000

Sarah talks about learning through life’s complexities. I talk to her about her claim being a child of God, marriage, motherhood, unconditional love, and patience in her faith.

Welcome to my series on practical faith. I have said countless times that it is easy to memorize scripture. It is even easier to preach it and text it. Faith is challenged when the rubber hits the road. It is a different ball game to put faith into practice. However, people notice unconditional love when you serve them and do not want anything in return, and just be there for them. It is this part of practical faith that fascinates me.

Sarah, welcome to my blog. I want to know a little about you?

Hi! My name is Sarah Styf. Despite being a California baby, I spent most of my life raised in the Midwest. When I married my husband, we stayed in the Midwest for thirteen more years but traded Michigan for Indiana. We became Midwest transplants to Texas five years ago and we love the warmer winters. We have two amazing kiddos (11 and 9) and two middle-aged dogs. I’m a high school English teacher and yearbook advisor who loves to write in my “spare” time.

You make a bold statement on all your social media channels that you are a child of God. Talk to me about this statement. What does it mean? How can we embrace it in our hearts and minds?

Being a child of God means that, that is my first identity. I love Jesus, I love the gospel, and I believe that should drive my every action. Sure, I’m sinful and I screw up (a lot), but at the end of the day, how I approach the world and how I treat people should reflect that identity. I want the rest of the world to know that God loves and forgives us even in our brokenness. Jesus came to rescue the lost. I think that a lot of people have forgotten that and need to remember that in their interaction with others.

Walk me through your dating relationship. How did it evolve to marriage and to husband and wife? I am sure it is a perfect marriage?

Jeff and I met shortly after we graduated from the SAME high school. There were only about 250 in our graduating class, but because I was a junior transfer, we somehow never met. Mutual friends introduced us just because they wanted me to hang out with them after closing at McDonald’s. Honestly, it was a really rocky start, especially since I was headed to Nebraska and he was staying in Michigan. But when we finally started officially dating, we worked out the distance. Our marriage has been nearly 20 years of growing together. I often say that long-distance was terrible but it made us better. We both spent time discovering ourselves and having our own adult lives (as much as college kids can) before we got married and had to learn how to grow together. And we have to work on our marriage constantly. We aren’t perfect, but we are perfect for each other. God knew that which is why I’m pretty sure we didn’t meet until after graduation. We never would have dated if we knew each other in high school. We were too different at that point in our lives.

Motherhood has its own expectations. Anything about it surprised you? What have you learned from that experience?

I didn’t know the depth of the love I would have for my kids and just how different my relationships would be with them. I’ve worked really hard to keep communication open with them and be honest with them (in age-appropriate ways) about everything. I have such deep conversations with my 11-year-old daughter and I hope that she always sees me as someone she can come to. It is the hardest and most rewarding job in the world.

My daughter and son teach me every day about unconditional love, patience, and myself …This is a powerful statement on your blog. Help me understand this statement?

I see so much of myself in both kids in different ways. I’ve learned a lot about my own personality watching them grow up and it’s helped me better understand why I responded to things as a child as I watch them. And being a parent takes so much patience because when our kids are holding up a mirror to us, it is hard to accept. And they are unpredictable. I often struggle with my own kids in ways that I don’t struggle with my teenage students because those kids are the same with each group that comes in. Teenagers are teenagers. But your own kids grow up and they keep changing the rules. Just when you think you have them figured out, they grow up and change again.

I was unemployed, my wife was diagnosed and my mother became very sick. Talk about a perfect storm. I dug deeper into my faith, deeper in my relationships with other people. Talk to me about the challenges you have faced as an individual and how you have overcome them?

I moved during some pretty important periods in my life, particularly during important parts of my adolescence. It is something I still struggle with because trust and relationships were disrupted enough times that I struggle with that as an adult. When we moved to another city while our daughter was a baby, I found myself regressing into my teenage self because I didn’t want to move but we had to move as a family. That was a really dark time for me personally but we worked through it as a family. I really started writing again at that time. We struggled to get pregnant with our daughter, and now I feel the need to be open about that because so many couples suffer through that in silence. We shouldn’t be embarrassed to talk about something that impacts thousands of couples a year. My faith and my husband are with me all the time. God guides me but my husband has supported me through some really difficult emotional times.

I see bumper stickers of ‘I love Jesus’ many bloggers have ‘love Jesus’ as their mantra. Talk to me about the practical aspects of ‘loving Jesus’. To me means loving others unconditionally and serving. I have to say in our individual western culture, Christians are failing.

We need to treat people the way we want to be treated. We need to treat all people like human beings deserving of life. I believe Americans take too much pride in our individualism. Human beings are supposed to be dependent on each other. That is how we were created. We need other people to function as a healthy society. And yes, we need to embrace serving each other. Unfortunately, our current political division makes what should be a natural outpouring of our faith in a political statement, and that needs to change.

There is something catchy about your blog ‘accepting the unexpected journey’ What do you mean by this?

Everything in my life has been unexpected and I write about my life. Using that as the anchor for my blog helps me circle everything back to the idea that life is a journey and we don’t get to plan it, we just have to live it the best we can.

As an extrovert this whole social distance and isolation are making me struggle, what about you as an introvert?

Being an introvert makes it a little easier because I’m not freaking out about seeing everyone, but I do miss my closest people. And when we were all tightly quarantining, it was ROUGH. We were all on top of each other and no one had any personal space or alone time. I really miss alone time.

The post Child of God appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

What is the Catholic Church?

admin — Wed, 13 May 2020 14:31:43 +0000

Amanda Griesbaum is the creator of Following Isidore, where she writes about the Catholic faith, rural life, and recipes from her grannie. She believes the best way to live out God’s two greatest commandments: Love Him and Love your Neighbor, is to learn, practice, and share your faith and do it all with good food! She has not had a neighbor turn away brownies or good conversation.

She was born and raised in Buckeye, making a home in the Show-Me-State. She moved from one Midwest state, Ohio, to another, Missouri, where her husband is originally from. She has three kids, two cats, two dogs, and whatever creatures she happens to acquire. Amanda and her husband are starting their own branch of the family farm while they both teach high school. He is a former Science teacher turned Ag teacher, and she is a former Ag teacher turned Science teacher.

I am fascinated by faith. I have interviewed people from the Hindu, Sikh, Parsi, and Evangelical Christian faiths. The Catholic faith has a special place in my heart. I love cathedrals, art, literature, and baroque architecture, and the Catholic faith is intertwined with my passion. I sit down for a chat with Amanda. In the first part of the interview, we talk about living out the Catholic faith and what that entails, the beliefs, rituals, and dogmas of the Catholic faith, life as a farmer, marriage, and motherhood.

Amanda, I consider it an honor and privilege to interview you. Help me understand what is living out the Catholic faith in rural life means?

As my Rural Sociology professor would say in class, ‘If we recognize that there is a Rural culture, we must recognize that there is an Urban culture.’

And God does the same thing – technically He did it first…

Even Though the Catholic Church is universal in its readings, practices, teachings, etc. (I can attend mass at my home parish, out of state, or abroad, and know what I will be hearing and how to participate.) God still meets us where we are and uses our communities and experiences to teach us and bring us closer to Him.

That to me is beautiful.

In a rural community that may look like having a home canned-goods exchange, blessing of fields, prayers for rain, bonfire get-togethers, talking about hunting and fishing with your Deacons, and introducing your priest to the county fair.

I love it when a new priest arrives at our parish and we get to introduce him to our community!

For someone who has never seen an eight-year-old show a 1200 lbs steer, it’s a bit of a shock. Yet, it demonstrates very clearly the expectation God gave us to have dominion over and care for His creatures. Not to mention the determination and power of a child.

All of these things are where we can share and experience God in a way we understand.

As someone who has lived in rural communities all of her life, we are very close to the cycles of the Earth: its seasons, the cycle of birth and death, sensitivity to the weather, and our reliance on it. We are accustomed to the joys and frustrations of caring for those creatures and land.

We are people of faith and hope.

I use the terms ‘faith’ and ‘hope’ quite a bit. I should probably explain what I mean by those two words. To me they are actionable.

When life becomes difficult you maintain your faith and act in hope. You continue to go to church and pray even when it feels impossible. You still get up every morning and take care of your animals even when the market has bottomed out. You continue to plant year after year not knowing if the weather will be in your favor for the season.

You keep doing because your faith and hope drive you to live your purpose and trust God. You don’t just sit and wait for things to improve because you might be part of God’s plan to make it better for yourself or others. You continue to say ‘Yes’ and take action.

And while country life may seem slow-paced and full of sunsets – and in some ways, it is – it is a life of action, just not in the same way as our Urban counterparts.

We may not be rushing to work just to get stuck in traffic. But I can bet you that farmer in the tractor is moving as fast as he can to get to the next field.

Walk me through the Catholic faith. The beliefs, rituals, dogmas, and how it has helped you?

I wish I had a degree in theology right now! Since I don’t, here are the big ones as far as beliefs/rituals/etc.

The Catholic faith is centered around the Eucharist, the true presence of Christ in the Host (bread) as the Son of God and the Messiah. It is a miracle and a mystery we get to experience every time we attend Mass. It is why we go to Mass – A good homily (sermon) and music are a bonus. We need Jesus with us and in us.

We believe Jesus was conceived in the Virgin Mary by the Holy Spirit. We have a deep love and devotion to Mary because of her ‘Yes’ to God’s will. We see her as being the perfect example of how to love and serve God.

Because we believe in Christ’s death and resurrection, we accept the need to die to ourselves to make room for God’s will. We can do this through the Sacraments of Baptism, Marriage, Reconciliation, Anointing of the Sick, Holy Orders, Communion/Eucharist, and Confirmation. Each of these is a way for us to serve others instead of ourselves. They allow us to be humble and receive the grace of having a deeper formation in the faith through living the life that God intended.

If I could, I would just put the Apostles Creed in here.

The Catholic faith is both a practice of hope and of intellect which is why I love it so much. I rely on my hope of achieving heaven to cause me to learn and act in a way that will help me realize it. It is not a ‘resting’ faith. It is very much a faith of action in devotion, service, and education.

Before my husband and I joined the Church at Easter of 2017, I had always had a love of Jesus (raised Protestant). I also had a curiosity about what else there was to Christianity passed baptism as a ‘ticket’ to heaven. There had to be more.

The Catholic faith encourages learning and curiosity. It feeds my soul and my desire for knowledge without feeling like I am betraying my beliefs. Rather, I find, the more I learn and question, the more my faith and security in Christ and the Church are strengthened.

One very particular practice that I have adopted since joining the Church is attending Adoration. A time that I sit with Jesus where the Host is exposed and is never left alone. We don’t need a repeat of the Garden of Gethsemane.

So I sit and stay awake with Him during my 2 AM weekly date night. (How cool is that? I get to have regular date-nights with Jesus!)

I can feel Him sit with me. And sometimes that is all I do, just sit with Him. More often than not I will journal. It may be about a struggle I am having, something I am grateful for, or just something I want an answer to. I will write and pray. Turns out the Holy Spirit likes to communicate with me through writing, gets me out of my head.

After I write, then I read Scripture. And it has never failed to show me what I need for that night.

And I don’t plan out what I will read, I just close my eyes and open my Bible. It is a beautiful experience and one that I am missing terribly since Covid-19 began and the chapel closed.

Being near Jesus in the Eucharist is only part of being in Communion with Him.

I am continuing to develop my relationship with Him so when I can sit with Jesus again, I will know Him better.

I admire farmers. It is because of their hard work, dedication, and creativity that I get food on the table. Talk to me a little bit about life as a farmer?

Beautiful and tragic.

The ‘FFA Creed’ says it best:

‘I believe that to live and work on a good farm, or to engaged in other agricultural pursuits, is pleasant as well as challenging; for I know the joys and discomforts of agricultural life, and hold an inborn fondness for those associations which, even in hours of discouragement, I cannot deny.’

My husband and I memorized these words when we were in high school as members of the National FFA Organization. Today, as current/former FFA Advisors, these words still hold a place in our hearts. We believe in the tradition of farming and the future possibilities the agricultural industry holds.

We both have that inborn fondness for agriculture. Our parents and grandparents instilled them in us just as theirs did for them.

We have experienced great joy in being part of the ag industry. It gave us our first jobs, created community, and provided us with our purpose: To secure America’s future in agriculture by educating the next generation. This also includes beginning our own branch of the family farm and making it sustainable for our children.

It has also caused us the greatest pain. Jeremy’s father was killed in a tractor rollover accident in the pasture beside our house. We struggle with the loss of him every day. He was the one we were supposed to expand the farm with. He was the one who was supposed to teach us everything. He was supposed to be the one to watch our children grow and be there for them as they learn how to care for the land. We were supposed to watch him grow old. But none of that happened.

Yet, here we are. Still pursuing our goal of farming despite its tragedies and because of love. The love and passion Ralph had for his animals, his land, and the people he served were passed on to us. His charisma and devotion was something you couldn’t help but catch if you were around him.

Even when the markets drop out, a stubborn cow finds a hole in the fence, when we wish the farm ran on a 9-5 schedule, or the worst happens – we will never regret choosing to farm. It gives us everything we need. Time with family and friends, lessons for our children, a home and community, and a respect for God.

I want to know a little bit about your family. How did marriage change you as a person? How did becoming a mother change you? Any surprises along the way?

Fun story, my husband and I met in Washington DC at a leadership conference through FFA. I was from Ohio and just completed my Sophomore year of high school and he was from Missouri and had just graduated high school.

You want to talk about God bringing us together.

This was the first year my FFA chapter had gone to this annual event in decades and this was Jeremy’s last chance to go.

This conference is offered something like 8 different weeks in the summer, with two hotels for each week, with like 500 kids in each, with those divided into like 30 groups.

And we were there during the same week, the same hotel, and the same group. I will let you do the math on the odds.

One two-step and a swing dance later we found ourselves long-distance dating for 3.5 years. Until he moved to Ohio after graduating from college. Then we waited another 2.5 years before we got married.

I had the education to finish and I was worth the wait. He thought so too.

We have been lucky to grow up together. We developed as individuals and as a couple in our time together. That makes it difficult to tell how marriage changed us. What I will say is we appreciated our time together. We didn’t live with each other before marriage so getting married wasn’t just a formality. It was a change. But a natural one that felt right and comfortable.

What did cause a larger shift was becoming parents.

I always wanted kids, like two, but never saw myself as the ‘mothering’ type. Jeremy, however, was very much into being a dad. It was cute and still is. I love catching him in moments with the kids when he is reading to them or playing with them.

It is very attractive and makes me love him more. It also has made me love being a mother. I am now a person who is ‘give me all the babies!’ just pile them on. Which came as a surprise to me! Even with the three that we have now, who are very close in age, and the chaos that comes with it, I still would love more.

Each child, not only my own, is such a precious gift that is full of purpose and potential. I can’t imagine life without that possibility. Which is why, now more so that I am a mom when I see my students who struggle with home, or a child mistreated, or hear of abortion, my heart physically aches knowing what could or should be.

It has also caused me to have a greater devotion to Mary. I love thinking about her as a mother. I love looking at my kids with her in my heart and wonder what it was like to watch Jesus learn how to walk. Did she laugh when he caught a cat by the tail, did she run across a room to fish something out of his mouth, did she hold him and pray for him to fall asleep when he was fussing and she was tired? How did she help form his faith? Did she have patience? Did she feel that same mix of love, wonder, and sadness that all mothers carry?

She helps me every day by showing me how to love her Son and in turn my husband, children, and community. I’m far from perfect but she helps keep me on track – or at least prevents me from going completely off the rails. Motherhood is hard.

The post What is the Catholic Church? appeared first on Four Columns of a Balanced Life.

What is prayer?

admin — Thu, 25 Apr 2019 12:48:32 +0000

Prayer is a form of communication or supplication directed toward a deity, higher power, or divine being. It is a practice that is often associated with religious or spiritual traditions and is found in various forms across different cultures and belief systems.

In prayer, individuals express their thoughts, feelings, gratitude, requests, or devotion to the object of their worship. Prayers can take many forms, including spoken words, silent thoughts, rituals, or written expressions. The content and purpose of prayers can vary widely, ranging from seeking guidance, expressing gratitude, asking for assistance, seeking forgiveness, or simply fostering a sense of connection with the divine.

Different religions and spiritual traditions have their specific practices and beliefs regarding prayer. In some traditions, prayer may involve specific rituals, gestures, or recitation of sacred texts. In others, it may be more personal and spontaneous. Overall, prayer serves as a means for individuals to connect with their spiritual beliefs, seek comfort, and find a sense of purpose and meaning in their lives.

I talked to Pastor Beth Graf about prayer.

Beth, a pleasure having you onboard. Please share with my audience a little about you?

I’ve been married to my high school sweetheart for 26 years. I’m a mom to two amazing teenagers. I’m a former E.C.E. and Kindergarten teacher. Currently, I’m the Ministry Health Pastor (part-time) at Sanctus Church and a certified Spiritual Life Coach in my private practice. The best part of my life is the incredible adventure of following Jesus Christ for 43 years!

This month you released The Truth About You: God’s Thoughts For You. What is it about? What is the main message? Why should we read it?

I’m thrilled to share that I have recently published a children’s book on Amazon called “The Truth About You: God’s Thoughts For You”. While it’s geared toward younger children, the book is full of “identity-shaping” truths for all ages.

Amazingly, all the words/concepts in this book come from Listening Prayer with my daughter and son when they were 4 to 10 years old. After they would say their bedtime prayers, we would pause and listen to see what the Lord Jesus wanted to say to them in response. I recorded all the simple, profound truths that came to their child’s hearts. Two years ago, the Lord impressed upon me that He wanted other children to know these same truths, so He inspired me to create this book!

There is also a bonus section at the end for Parents/Caregivers to help their children hear from God for themselves. Children can easily hear from the Lord if they are shown how.

I know you were a pastor for prayer and now a ministry health pastor. I want to know what is prayer.

From my experience, prayer is an authentic, ongoing conversation with God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. You speak with honor and transparency to God and He speaks lovingly and truthfully to you.

Your depth of knowing God depends on your choice. Let me explain – To know God the Father and the Holy Spirit intimately, you first must welcome a relationship with Jesus Christ, the Son of God. The reason for this is that Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross is the only thing that makes us perfect and holy again. When we personally accept Jesus’ sacrifice and invite Him into our lives to lead us, God shifts from being outside of us to the inside of us. This internal dwelling of Jesus Christ is what can make our relationship and prayer life more profound and intimate with God. God is no longer, “the universe” or far away, we can know and experience Him profoundly within.

One final thought, to grow in your prayer life requires making it part of your everyday life. Just like exercising your body or brushing your teeth, make it an intentional holy habit. For me now at this point in my life, it’s like I never hang up the phone on God, I’m communicating with Him and He is sharing with me constantly.

Many people treat God like a genie in a bottle and buy into the prosperity gospel. What should we know about prayer? Do we really need it in our daily lives?

When I was first following Jesus, prayer was all about asking God for what I wanted and for Him to help me with my plans. Now after years of following, surrendering to Him, and becoming more like Jesus, my prayers are often, “God, what do You want? Have Your Way. Your kingdom comes, Your will be done.”

I have tried to release God of all my expectations of Him and what I thought was the way He should answer and respond to my prayers. It just led to such disappointment. Yet, what would our world be like if God were obligated to fulfill the will of every human being? That would be disastrous! Thankfully, the LORD is obligated only to His will. So now when I pray, I ask the Lord what He wants regarding situations and people, listen for His answer, and then pray it back to Him. As a result, I see incredible and specific answers to my prayers.

Let’s be honest. Prayer is not natural. Give us some practical examples of how we can get better at it. How we can make it a habit?

We all seem to make time to brush our teeth, why? Because it’s important for our health and we value our smile.

In making prayer a habit, it’s so important to first realize that prayer is incredibly valuable! For some reason, God has chosen to work with humanity to see His will fulfilled on the earth. Prayers that aren’t prayed, won’t be answered by Him. I used to think that God didn’t really need my prayers and that He was just going to do whatever He wanted anyway. However, as I got to know Him and read the Bible, I realized that although He was Sovereign overall, God still decides to use our feeble prayers to usher in His will on the earth (Matthew 7:7).

Once I realized my prayers mattered, it was motivation to make it a habit.

I recommend the following on how to get better at prayer:

Ask the Holy Spirit to teach you how to pray.

Be intentionally aware of God’s presence in your everyday life.

Create a prayer rhythm in your schedule. Start simple with a short prayer time once a day. As you find it beneficial, increase the length of time or frequency. For me, I have an intentional prayer time in the morning, as I get ready, where I give God all that I’m facing that day and ask for His help. Before bed, I also get on my knees and unload all the stresses of my day on Him and pray whatever else the Holy Spirit brings to mind.

Make room for spontaneous prayer in your day. As stuff comes up, have an internal conversation with Him or out loud when you’re on your own.

When you don’t know what to say to God, pray for a Bible verse that resonates with you. The Lord’s Prayer in Matthew 6:9-13 is helpful. Writing/journaling prayers are powerful as well.

Help me understand as a pastor what women’s empowerment means to you.

It means fair opportunity, respect, and an equal voice at the table.

The more I read about Jesus, the more I am impressed. He was always surrounded by women. He cared for the prostitute, and the menstruating woman, and talked to them. This was unheard of in His time and culture. What can we learn from this and apply it to the 21st century?

I don’t fully understand why women have always seemed to be “less than” men – not taken as seriously, marginalized, objectified, covered/hidden, silenced, or poorer. We can truly learn from Jesus who honored women and gave them a voice and significant roles to play in His life story and mission. It was an ordinary teenage girl who was chosen as His earthly mother and a former prostitute who was first given the gospel to share with others that Jesus was alive from the dead.

Jesus empowered the marginalized, those that others would overlook or even reject. He loved them, taught them, and then entrusted them with His mission of sharing the good news of His salvation. Jesus had both male and female followers who were valued and called to fulfill His vision. We’re all in this together.

You have been married for a while and are a mother. Please give my audience three practical tips on being a mother and wife.

As a wife and mother:

Ask God to help you be unselfish and give you wisdom all the time.

Communicate honestly, respectfully, and kindly – treat your husband and kids the way you want to be treated.

Let go of control. There are seasons when children are young and need you to protect them but as they grow, give them space to breathe, discover, and take risks. Don’t feel the pressure to change your husband. Leave him and your kids in the trustworthy hands of God and be free of worrying over them.

Beth, we can read our Bible, trust God, and pray all we want. However, we have to be intentional in dealing with our issues, hurt, pain, anger, resentment, and other challenges. Give me some practical examples of how we can do this.

Forgive others – truly from your heart. When you forgive, it’s not that you are agreeing that what happened to you was right, it’s choosing to let the person off your hook and leave them on God’s hook. Un-forgiveness, bitterness, and resentment take up too much emotional energy. Let it go. You’ll find it so freeing not to keep track of every wrong that has ever happened to you. You’ll have more time to think of other things and feel more positive emotions – anger and bitterness are “joy-killers.”

Forgive God and yourself. In our brokenness, we can hold unforgiveness toward God in our heart for times He let us down and allowed things to happen to us that were painful. Release God of your expectations and forgive Him, it’s just a block in your relationship to Him if you don’t. The truth is He’s perfect, He can’t do anything wrong, it’s our pain that distorts our perception. You can’t be perfect, that’s why Jesus lived a perfect life for us and died for our imperfections, that we would be made right with our perfect Creator God. Let yourself go free of unrealistic expectations and ask for Jesus’ help moving forward.

Let go of shame. It makes us hide from God and others. God made you to shine for Him! Ask Him to forgive you and He will.

Renounce lies you believed about yourself through pain and trauma – lies like I’m fat, I’m ugly, I don’t matter, I’m unworthy, What I have to say isn’t important, unlovable, I’m not good enough or I don’t measure up. Like shame, lies keep us from being all God wants us to be. DON’T HOLD BACK, SHINE!

Know the truth about God and who He really is according to Scripture and know the truth about you and how He sees you. Walking in these truths will set you free.

I know you went through a serious physical challenge a couple of years back. Walk me through how you dealt with it and came out thriving at the end of the tunnel?

When I was 27, I came to a place in my life where I wanted to experience God. I knew about Jesus but I didn’t really know Him – there’s a big difference. In desperation, I cried out to the Lord to encounter me. I wanted to know Him and He came to me. His peaceful presence overwhelmed me and as a result, I learned to love Him and His Word – the Bible. I also gained an intense desire to worship Him and put Him first and began to discern His personal thoughts for me and others.

When I was 41 years, I became very sick and started to lose weight for a whole year. Eventually, I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis (bowel disease) and hospitalized in September 2012. I remember when the GI specialist said, “I think I’m going to upgrade your diagnosis to Crohn’s Colitis”. This was devastating because there is no known cure for Crohn’s disease. It felt like he had dropped 2 tonnes on me and that I’d been given a life sentence.

When he left the hospital room, I immediately cried out to God and this was the memorable dialogue that ensued.

Me: “Lord Jesus, I know that what You say is the truest reality! What do You want to tell me right now? I need Your voice.”

Jesus: “HEALED!” (I was astonished!)

Me: “Do You mean the ultimate healing in death?” (I frankly felt so awful and was in so much pain, I wanted to die).

Jesus: “No.”

Me: “Then when will You heal me, God?” (I wanted His healing yesterday).

Jesus: “Soon.”

Me: “Is that according to Your sense of time or my timeline?”

I never got an answer. But from that moment onward, I clung in faith to His word HEALED even though things didn’t initially change. One important thing I remember doing was not agreeing to the doctor’s diagnosis and owning it. I never said ”I have Crohn’s” or “My disease”, instead I would say, “I’ve been diagnosed with Crohn’s Colitis”. I took God’s word to me seriously and I wasn’t going to agree to anything less than HEALED.

Long story short, listening for His voice got me through such a dark time when I was stripped of everything. I couldn’t even mother my children and had to go stay with my parents for 2 months. I was broken so profoundly but I kept hearing God say to me that He would raise me up and that was the bright light at the end of a dark tunnel. I realized that HOPE is imperative. To not have hope is deathly. His voice was so reassuring and hopeful.

Prayer also helped. So many people at my church and my family were praying for me faithfully. I prayed constantly. On multiple occasions, I was blessed to have people visit and pray over me asking God to heal me. Praying against the enemy of my soul and breaking off his legal claim to me was incredibly beneficial too.

Dealing with my emotional pain, especially fear, was healing for me. Science has proven that our emotional brain is the lining of our digestive system and with Crohn’s Colitis affecting my whole digestive system, addressing my emotional baggage was essential.

But ultimately it was God. I remember the day in July 2015, I had spent a rare 5 days in a row alone with Him. The Holy Spirit lead me in a deep healing experience and I was remarkably set free from a lot of fears in my life and even a spirit of fear. The LORD told me that because I had let Him deal with the root cause of the illness, I could go off Imuran, my medicine. This was very risky because the drug managed the Crohn’s Colitis. But I took a leap of faith and trusted God’s voice over anyone else. That was almost 4 years ago and I’m eating everything. I gain weight and I lose it when I want. I don’t have irritable bowels. I don’t have any further symptoms.

All I can do is praise the LORD and agree with Him – HEALED!!

To sum it up, learning to discern and obey the true voice of the Father, The Son (Jesus) and the Holy Spirit, eating well, exercise, dealing with emotional pain/fears, natural supplements/probiotics, medicine, healing prayer – God used all of it to restore me.

Finally, how do you find balance and place priority in your own life with regard to food faith finance, and family?

I don’t always do this well. It’s tough. I was recently talking with someone and they didn’t like the word balance and it got me thinking. Sometimes there are seasons where you need to give more to your family, sometimes there are seasons when you need to give more to your faith and relationship with God and sometimes you need to focus more on your health.

I don’t know the answer to this, but I do know that the closer I am to God, the more the rest of my life/responsibilities are harmonized.

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